Captain

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

"Ok my goodness gracious me, Camel burgers now only one dollar" bull started taking a liking to Ahab the Arab, and .........

..... bull bought 2 dozen burgers with the lot (he could identify the bits that were camel-ish but he didn't have a clue what all the other stuff was).

Then bull explained his purchase "At Risdon airport, burgers in the cafe are about $25 and that's just for bog common wagyu beef, not this exotic stuff, so I am saving $24 per burger, which is a bargain, and by buying 2 dozen I have saved myself $576, which is almost enough fuel to get me home."

Onetrack thought this was a great idea, so took an Emirates flight to Cairo and ..........

6 hours ago, bull said:

Ps - Crappy stuffed up his Mawson and Shackleton references, but he knows that all NESers are forgiving about such things. And also conveniently forgot that the jackaroo was a tail dragger  so the aircraft that turbine extractions had found was not the jackaroo of the famous Bull from the NES but a long lost flying mount of......................

.... some other unlicensed AUF flyer. This was a clever ploy, as by saying he was unlicensed meant that it could have been one of hundreds and those AUF members all look the same.

As much as Crappy respects & admires his friend bull, he needs to point out that it was not Crappy that doesn't know his nose wheels from his empennage mounted little wheels ........... it was the great Turbo, who Crappy respects and admires even more than the aforementioned.

23 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........Sahara.

They welded the nosewheel leg back on, bull gave it full noise and he was up and away. The Turbine guy......

.... then called out from the ground (he was also an employee of Turbine ATC) "Hey bull, old mate, watch out for those pyramids" but bull had always wanted to visit Egypt + the Sahara so he .....

35 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

..................reluctantly agreed, and picke up the shovel.

He poured perspiration as he shoveled, but calculated his immeasurable wealth and  future membership of the Millionaires Club as he shovelled on........................

.... and the Jacka came into site, looking a bit like Mawson's ship in the ......

Ps - Crappy stuffed up his Mawson and Shackleton references, but he knows that all NESers are forgiving about such things.

IT LOOKED EXACTLY LIKE THIS

BUT SMALLER AND MORE PLANE-LIKE

6 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The nosewheel and leg came up straight away, and bull raced over to explain the rest needed to come up in one picece; anothe deal was struck to ...........

..... do a cashy, job-and-finish, so the driver agreed not to tell Turbo and bull would also give him a few cans of VB and access to bull's 40 acres of opium poppies with 10 minutes of free picking.

The TEC driver .....

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Eventially the Jacka ran out of energy, and he was able to start cutting steps up the side of the hole with his snow shovel. He ........

... had always been one to be 100% prepared, so a snow shovel in the luggage compartment of the Jacka just seemed logical to bull (after all, it may be needed in Tasmania in summer too).

As bull climbed out of the hole, snow shovel in hand, he considered what excuse he might offer to the inevitable AUF and NTSB enquiry into why he turned the Jackoff into a PistenBully, and he .....

2 hours ago, bull said:

The wingtip vortexes[avref] from Nobu.s drifter caused the little jackaroo to invert !Hmmmm thought Bull as he..........

..... applied skill, daring, muscle memory & a good dollop of luck to counteract the numerous laws of physics and fly coordinated so that ......

21 minutes ago, onetrack said:

Nonetheless, our intrepid bull decided to push on in the Jacka to go visit CT in DG, and get in some target practice - totally unaware, that upon even just entering the airspace surrounding DG International Airport, he would become the target, and......

..... that was just a few of CT's inebriated mates having fun (just a few DG dills plinking with 22's & an old rusty three-o, so how much harm can those little rimfires & some 1940s DOD ammo do anyway?), but what bull in his Jackoffroo had not anticipated was that there was also another of CT's Mafia body disposals going on just as bull decided to do a high speed beat-up down all 6 kms of runway 27, so as bull approached terminal velocity and the little pointy thing on the little round gaugy thing had gone around twice to be past VNe for the 2nd time, bull was feeling the ..... 

35 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....parking tickets from Moorabbinstan Airport which ...................

.... are normally waived because the Mextorians usually have to be paid to go anywhere near Moorabbistan, which until recently had been declared to be more dangerous than Kabul & Kiev combined, and that was only a small ..... 

14 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........headed for the warm welcome he new he would get from all Victorians, landing in the city of Sale where he was given a civic reception before.....

 

... he was approached by 2 Vicmanistan Gov't types who wanted to discuss bull's landing & other tax status (landing fees in Dan land are now more that land taxes), monies that bull still owes to the Stand-With-Dan fund, outstanding donations to buy red T-shirts and a couple of .......

A MEETING IN THE VICMANISTAN GOVERNMENT OFFICE IN LITTLE BOURKE ST, BEFORE 2 OF THEM HEADED DOWN TO SALE TO HAVE A "CHAT" WITH bull

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

The farmer got off with a handfull of ribbons.........

.... which is the 1st time that bull had heard of anybody "getting off" using those. "But to each his own" thought bull, who has seen some pretty kinky stuff in his time, and he .....

1 hour ago, bull said:

.little jackaroo just kept on humming and he soon arrived at King island to refuel, after a bouncing dodgy landing he taxied up to the bowser to find out he had...............

... fallen into the money-grubbing hands of Turbine Petroleum, Turbine Airports & Exorbitant Landing Fees Corporation, Turbine Snacks, Burgers & Milkshakes, Turbine #1s & #2s Dunnies, Turbine Immigration King Island P/L and .....

2 hours ago, onetrack said:

Accordingly, he fuelled up the Jacka, loaded up a change of clothing, pulled out his 1960 aviation charts and picked........

...... the VanDiemen'sland Transit Lane, where he followed the strobe lights past Strahan, Savage River, Stanley (he only cleared the nut by 30 ft after being on climb for 60 minutes), then across the Straight where the strobes were well spaced (and so was bull), but he flew (avref) on to glory and the .............

16 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........Jacinta Adern; running out of options on a mountain slope with no brakes........................

.... and that is when The Voice came back into the NES again (see Turbo's earlier posts on this contentious subject).

There was a clap of thunder and The Voice said, "You just HAVE to vote in favour or you are a racist, even though I cannot provide any details" and on this occasion The Voice did not have the loud booming authoritative voice that you would expect, and which had undertaken that chat with Moses, .... but rather it was the sniveling sound of Albo in his rented acubra, where he & Jacinta were "like that" and years ago at one of the Labor Youth Conferences they had even ......

9 hours ago, Captain said:

..... confirmation that Onesie receives a royalty each time his image appears online or in a cartoon (it is little known that Dick Dastardly was styled on the MonoRoot's appearance and personality) and from the movement of his right hand as per bull's above post, you know where that comes from and that since his early adolescence you can tell that he has also regularly been polishing his ......   

.... personal presentation, to the point where he is now Western Australia's equivalent of .....

40 minutes ago, bull said:

or advice here ! Well said Cappy [whilst twirling the ends of his fighter pilots mustache] I think we should start with.............  

..... confirmation that Onesie receives a royalty each time his image appears online or in a cartoon (it is little known that Dick Dastardly was styled on the MonoRoot's appearance and personality) and from the movement of his right hand as per bull's above post, you know where that comes from and that since his early adolescence you can tell that he has also regularly been polishing his ......   

32 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....you could pull a battery out in ..............................

.... while at the drivein, but never forget to remove the speaker before leaving and heading up to kissing point.

"What's that got to do with it Crappy?" yelled Willis. "Come on mate, I'm in strife here, so give me some assistance or ...........

7 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......extrapula.

It was then that he decided to jettison the battery. They would have thought of....

..... that at Nissan when the Leaf was created, but then again, the ED was conceived on the back seat of an FJ way back in the day, when .......

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

he realised that option had gone, and tried to release his harness by ..........

....... but the crutch strap (you need a 5-point harness in an ED to withstand the forces), which had been to this point chafing his damaged ........

10 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

90 minutes later there was a sound a bit like a cat spitting, and flames started coming up from underneath Willis. It.........

........ is just experience" Willis thought "And experience is valuable because it makes you stronger.....  unless it kills you. Plus I should be able to relate this in a paid article in Flying magazine next month".

However, as the flames increased and the height (avref) got lower, Willis experienced that sphincter pucker (avref) that most pilots know.

"Geeez, that hurts even more" he thought "I've got a pucker only inches away from my damaged .........

10 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

...elbow as he turned to get the bandaid.

Turning back, he slammed the bandaid ...............................

........ right over the end, which was not the original end because that had been shot away, but like an amputated arm, Willis could still feel it, so he was unaware that the iodine stain and the radical shortening was going to have an adverse effect on his ...........

3 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

"OW!"  Willis yelled as .......

.... the paramedic sloshed 1/2 a litre of iodine on the wound, then laughed" ..... (just like Cappy's mum used to do every time his skin was breached).

"Are you a paralytic paramedic?" yelled Willis as he winced and writhed in the iodine induced pain, but that was nothing, as the paramedic then hit it with his ......

57 minutes ago, Captain said:

(Turbo was a todger dodger).

"In addition to being a todger dodger, Turbo has always had a bit of a dodgy todger too" commented Mavis with a knowing look in her eye.

11 hours ago, bull said:

.Turbo ,who had to dodge to one side as the bullet sailed past his ............

.... todger (Turbo was a todger dodger).

11 hours ago, bull said:

.the shooter ,now this pissed him off a bit and he let loose a volley of 20 shots 5 of which penetrated Turbo,s t..........

....odger.

The paramedic asked Turbo "So which do you prefer, mate? For the shooter to have missed as in bulls scenario (A) or story option (B) where bull had you to copping a large caliber round to your ..........

Cappy notes bulls attempt to divide the NES and send thousands of readers off in diverging directions. bull appears to have exhibited a bit of a nasty streak since his neck 

Just say'n.