Captain

...... all the usual f'n Q mod-cons, like various quantities of assorted driftwood, an old drifter, the back left door from a FJ Holden, a '55 Harley with a clutch problem, a 55 year old bloke with a crutch problem, some Vegemite, ............

........ reminda mee off my brother Andy (whicha means "Brave" and "Manly" in the Wiki list of Portugese baby names), but the only Andys that I know are nothing like Manly, .............. as they are more like Dromana or Bondi or ..... some muddy creek in f'n Q covered with sand-flies and mangroves, or....................

..... am keen to know the genus of who or what I will be spending the night with."

"Obrigardo" said Paulo the Portugese, who was a dark swarthy stranger with a dark swarthy secret.

But TurdBro the mulato was swarthier and said "............

........'s all this about?" asked Madge (who is still trying to be nice to everyone to maximise the yield of votes (RAARef)), "Does anyone have an app that will translate from Tink's Mexican into .............

....married already, and started to get teary eyed.Reaching for his ever-ready whiskey he said "........

"I pay be missed but I want everyone to know that I love Loxlie like a brother, and that has great nigsificance down Nongedand way, and .................

.... it out."

Then it really hit the fan, as Andy was jealous of Thing-a-Lot's success, bull was concerned that Thing-a-lot would work his way through all of the available partners before bull had a chance, and Brine was worried because Gay Marriage laws were passed in the ACT yesterday and he thought that Loxie might be ............

.... anyone-a who rides-a white bike is a very kool guy."

"I agree Vale" responded Brine "And what's more, AhLox may be a bit suss, but he is OUR AhLox and we luff heem (said with the accent of the old Polish lady with the pony in Seinfeld (my seester's had AhLox, my brother's had AhLox and we all luffed heem)." {Dear reader ........ does this mean that AhLox has been involved in a ménage-à-cztery with that family .... stay tuned for more breaking news]

"Now hang on there" interjected the ruiner of Hats and the 12 Incher in unison "We think that luff might be too strong a term (a bit like the terms that Colonel Franklin uses when he discusses those aircraft from S'n f'n Q) and we think ..........

moderati extraordinaire who specialise in special deviance, and not only that but are one eyed, and even...

...... handed.

"But being uni-ocular, uni-globular, uni-molar, uni-cameral (and thank goodness he only has one of those) and uni-que, our best and favourite Moderattori was flabbergasted and said in a Valentino Rossi accent ".............

...... frighten off replies from the regular NES'ers.

"Yes" said ElRatto "All this talk of std deviation is sure to concern old Loxie, who is extremely sensitive to standard deviance, after all he is one of the ...........

Or also install a GPS to aid monitoring of trip progress, take the guesswork/calculation out of true speed, obtain an indication of winds aloft, know for certain your vmg and time to run.

...... put the hard word on her.

"Good point, Salty" said Ratsack "Except if your girlfriend (OptimisticRef) is uni-cuspid, in which case he would look like the belle of the ball."

"And speaking of balls, there is a strong chance that he is also uni-globular, in which case she ...........

... his finest feature.

"Well, I don't think he's all that bad, really, all things considered" said Mavis "And being duo cuspid is ..............

..... that pug face with the eyes about 3" too close together, and that tail that sticks up exposing everything, which are all off-centre by about ...........

..... it will be a considerable improvement over your usual ..........

..... your nuts for a necklace (a nut necklace (NutRef) is all the rage around the Harry Hawker aero-porto for the receipt and despatch of those new fangled flying machines), before I shove your giblets into .............

......... a lot, as inebriated or not, Ahlow had never needed a date rape drug before (hence his nickname of DFSA'ee).

"I don't understand" said the constable from the Canadian Club Mounted Police "Does that mean that you are also ............

... it was 8 hours bottle to throttle (AvRef).

"Don't youze worry about that" said Tubb (JoRef) "As I've been much more pisseder than this and still flown home from Moorabin to ye olde Bange-it-Holme."

"I have to be paralytic to fly, as it's the only way that I stop worrying about the danger" said a new Forum Member who was looking for someone to post him a backbone (FrightenedStudentRef).

"I agree" slurred Ahlox and I am the leader of gli Magsniffecent Moderphartti (Forumref) and I give us all permission to continue slurping 'cause I reckon that 30 minutes throttle to bottle will be fine, or it was before the Human Fat-chics course (inebriated AvRef) became PC, and as we all know, PC stands for .................

....... dance the night away, before they ...........

... with Salty playing live doing a Bill Haley impersonation (kiss-curl & all) and Turdbro in support impersonating Bill's Comets, as after all, Turdy is pretty burnt out.

AhRox is then booked to do a Chubby Checker set, and the FlugelViszler will 2nd bill for him doing 2 hours of Aretha Franklin numbers (Aretha will be supported by her brother Buddy).

Andy & the 12 Incher will then .............

...... don't you worry about that" said Mavis "As Birry was a real goer, but after Ho's success, on 2nd thoughts he may have either been Pol Pot or Mrs Nehru, and on reflection, Ruddy does look a bit like Nelson Mandella when the light shines from the NW ....... and Julia does have that Ahlox walk, so perhaps ...........

...... TurdBro, because of his recent stories and jokes."

"Hurrro" said Ho "Prease don't knock my brother Turdy as I am indeed Harold Chi Min (Chi Min is actuary Vietnamese for gesuntheit) but my mates call me Hally Holt Min, and as a past Plime Minister of this gleat Countly I can onry say ................

defiler@coffs[/email]' date=' post: 27041, member: 0"']So...anyone seen a Szara Tardis?" he asked hopefully....

... "No, but I know a tardy Zara" was the reply.

"So are we back again talking about matters relating to Harry Holt's swim across the Channel to Dunedin?" asked ElRatsack

"What about passengers?" asked Harriet

 

"Well.........."

"What" replied Andy who was a bit bowel-centric "Pass engers? I have trouble passing what goes into the hat, let alone trying to fit engers through ............

...... we would use him as part of our sausage sizzle, and if possible also invite the 12 incher to judge our bratwurst making competition this year, because even though we told him time and time again, Loxy always chose the worst bratwurst and not the best."

"Well then it would be called bratbest wouldn't it." replied The Locky who was ever applying the cute yet simple logic that had him elevated to the top of the Magnifficenti Moderatti, and now has him primed to be elevated to lead the 2014 version of the Spanish Inquisition if everyone's dad will approve having him move in just down the hall in the Value added tax-o-can.

"Geeez-Louise" thunk bull-who-had-been-trying-to-have-McLox-installed- as-the-Anglican-bishop-of-bone."I'll-have-trouble-competing-with-that, (a bit like GWS competing with the Swans to get Buddy), and-I'll-have-to-now ..............

Note - Original post edited by my Aunt to disguise just which churches were being referred to, as Ratty is getting on & needs to keep his nose clean + give some thought to studying for St Peter's final exams.

.... Andy does with his hats. We both use them, abuse them and then move on. Except that when I tick a box I use a large permanent Texta which Nanna just can't get enough of, yet Mavis much prefers the mid sized Pental white board markers (which she can rub off before moving on to the next bloke)."

Then Brine thought about it, phoned the CWA central office where he could hear 20 urns being tested in the background, and sandwich making courses being conducted in the next room to the lamington appreciation classes, and he asked "Do you girls ever meet at the Blue Oyster, would you trust Ahlow to dry his hose within 30 ft of one of your meetings, and ..............

........ when I invented the Hobbles meter (clever return by El Ratty to almost an Avref), which I originally did to record how long Nanna and the hot CWA chicks took to boil their urn."

"Well I never" replied Andy, who thought .............