Captain
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Everything posted by Captain
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.... riff-raff off Aircraft (avref) Pilates, who are often scouring themselves all over various topics and forums (forae) that ..... Please note Cappy's spelling corrections to Tubb's post as we can't have anyone "genufucting" here during hours when school kiddies and Stewed Ant Pilates (SAPs) might be lurking about.
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And has needed to make 60 annual edits to include new yuppy multi words like "Hii guuyys" and "Turbine Enterprises" to reflect their domination of western culture.
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...."Purges" is the kind & gentle word for it. Based on Cappy's decades as a leading Veterinarian (in the field and also in academia), what Turbo does is probably better described as "Scouring" in the worst possible sense of that term. Apologies for belaboring this point, but the NES always demands that we get the terms correct and accurate.
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...... purge your enemies to your heart's content, and that also means that you can ..... Knowing him as I do, as a best mate, I can say that when Turbo "purges" he usually does so like a man who has eaten 5 crook mussels, 4 rotten oysters and a bucket of manky prawns such that you wouldn't think that his body could take it any more (so Cappy will refrain from posting some of the videos that he has taken of Turbo in the past, mid-purge), but in the use of the term mentioned in the post, Turbo will arrange for anyone that Joey or Idi or Tung don't like to be taken around behind the dunny and terminated using the services of Turbine Purging and Termination Contractors PLC.
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..... Joey Starlin, Chairman Mao and Idi Armin "As it will make the exterminations faster and with Turbo as your Head of Security you can also ......
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..... a lot more per kg than bull gets for his by-catch. The Sharkus-Hairybackus is a well know killer, so Turbo .....
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And there, dear readers, plus our tens of thousands of NES lurkers, endeth the NES, there being no way to continue. So has it been deliberately shut down or has Turbo's computer/tablet/phone, or whatever else he uses, simply run out ....'s. If so, Cappy would be happy to lend Turbo 5 ..'s until payday ....... or pension day.
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FAIRNESS WARNING FOR ALL NESers. It has just come to Cappy's attention that the above image may possibly have been enhanced by AI, .......... so Grot's mum was certainly ahead of the game with her AI skills. The bloke at lower left is from Turbine's Prehistorical Nails & Beauty and is giving it a pedicure and nail trim, which can be dangerous if you trim the nails too short so that it hurts.
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..... , and in considering Grot's predicament it pays to remember that prehistoric crocodilians (PCs) were not the pissy little 20 footers that Turbo and Cappy sometimes wrestle today for the tourists at Steve's joint (so that they can check out Bindi & her mum). Back then they were more sizeable and below is a pic that Grot's mum took with her box brownie, when men were men (well partly developed Homos-apiens anyway) and the Crocs were proper full sized, although ..... That is Grot standing fully erect for the 1st time, at the bottom of the arrow.
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..... crocodilian .....
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..... that this is ideal material for making the bangy bit in the centre of a bolt bomb, [which were all the rage when Cappy was at high school (Yes, dear readers, he did proudly go that far with his edumacation)] so he scraped the red bits off the matches (which were thereafter known as "Heads" or "Blunt Toothpicks"}, put them inside the nut, added a cap from his cap-gun, screwed in the other bolt and headed around to throw it at Throg's mum's cave, after which ..... See the latest Hamas video below .... all liability denied.
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For those NESers unfamiliar with "The Big and Expansive History of Mankind" as written by Cappy, published by Turbine Press, and for sale in the city via Turbine and Robinsons & on the interweb via Turdazon or AmaTurd, the evidence is now clear from original neandertal cave paintings found in France, and in identical Egyptian hieroglyphs from which the following is a direct scanned copy.
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It is little known that the first use of the wheel was to use the timber offcuts to make skateboards. This invention made the Neanderthals very jealous as all of their females loved the freedom and antisocial acts of the Homo-S skateboarders as they zoomed around the front of Neanderthal caves and buggered up their paintings with their wheel tracks.
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..... had invented the single greatest advancement for homos-apiens since they developed the term "Hunter-Gatherer" and Grok Turbine had come up with "Redhead matches", but hadn't yet worked out what to do with them, until .....
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Hence why there are so few children in Nepal.
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As all NESers would know, it is not easy being the Campside Cook, a Forward Scout and the Commanding Officer, but the Cooks have performed that role ever since Fred and Wilma first did "it" in the back seat of his peddle car. Wilma getting ready for once they drop off Barney and Betty. All NESers should applaud Onesie's clever play on the Flintstone name. ..... perfected the tail dragger (dogwithwormsref) undercarriage, the Unicycle, the Menstrual Cycle, the Malvern Star, and the .....
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If any NESer wants a kukri, Cappy can get you one cheap via Cappy being the Grand Poobah of the Knights Templar. Cappy can also get you a special life insurance & funeral deal (mainly funeral) if you want to come and fight for us in Syria.
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..... spent time with the Gurkhas in order to hide his activities behind the lines in China, where he became so expert and precise with wielding a kukri that one of the many Japanese restaurants in Tibet offered him a job chucking eggs across the BBQ, using his kukri to make roses out of radishes, and ...... What Cappy's great, great, great grandy can do with one radish and his kukri.
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Mind you, this is because the Bok Choi is the same tenderness as a palm frond. And even the water is hard.
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.... to earn the additional campaign ribbons that get the chicks in every Anzac Day. But a kukri on each ear can be deleterious to one's shoulders, but would surely be handy in the event that a Gurkha tries to ..... A brown kbar, which is what the enemy does when it is used affectively.
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Most Stihl owners ask that question until they graduate up to a Husqvarna or Honda chainy or Whipper Snapper.
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...... as to save wear & tear on his Gerber Multi Tool, not to mention the Dersert Storm cammo KBar strapped to his leg, and the .....
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..... ability to chuck Harleys over his shoulder came from his family's long-standing practice of flicking pigs over a height stick, then after their manhood initiation program (sometimes involving circumcision with an early model Leatherman), they flicked steers (but never heifers, as the family has respect for the females of any species). Ted then strutted down the middle of Bayliss St, pulled his Leatherman from its pouch, and .....
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Cappy thanks his mate, Turbo, for this explanation and for straightening out his misunderstanding. Cappy apologizes for any angst that this may have caused.
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..... there was Doubtfire, stepping forward to protect the Cockies with thighs that are the personification of fat lady's thighs, and also with biceps like fat lady's thighs (all 100% unshaven) and with her firm long black truncheon erect & at the ready.[Some NESers who have dated Doubtfire in the past have questioned her ethnicity and trans status, but we shall leave that for another post]. So for all NESers that like their ladies to be carrying a bit of beef and to be on the cuddly side (and I know that you are out there), I invite you to consider the SaA's predicament and ......
