Captain

..... "Isn't that spelt phart in polite society, and at our age how do you sneak one out without shi......

..." said Cappy pointing at a very questionable part of the happy snap "What were you doing trying to stick THAT in THERE?" .... then he allowed the silence to sweep over them before Lyall blushed with embarrassment, while at the same time becoming a little aroused, and he ....

..... 'd for four" (million). "Will you take a cheque?" Cappy asked, but he had previously been debanked a couple of times to stop him from running as Prime Minister, and he was officially designated as "Working Class" ........ so when his new cheque book was issued, the writing bits and the number box were limited to 3 figures and a dot after the 1st one "So I can give you a few cheques of $9.99 each and we can .....

For new NES or AUF members, please be aware that not many people know, that the structure atop AUF House is designed to attract and channel cosmic energy, which enables the AUF President and entire Board to be infallible (which many already thought that they were even before they started to glow with cosmic power).

.... and the self-made working class members within the AUF, as well as Turbine Assorted Charities & Turbine Salvation Navy (the tambourine whizz-kids), rushed in to buy the item(s) with the purpose of donating the original as a centrepiece in the foyer of AUF house in Canberra, and with full sized copies to be placed in the foyers/coffee shops (AUFbucks [an AUF registered franchise]) of each of the AUF State Office towers. The bidding started at ...... AUF House in Canberra was made as a copy of Parliament House, only bigger.

..... , and knocked Leonardo's (DeVinci, not Turtle) designs into a cocked hat. With that, Bernie's sketches (see below) were in demand from the Smithsonian, the Brownstonian, the Louvre and the Perth mint, because ..... Bernie's production design sketch (Rev 3) of a Sikorski Blackhawk, which Leo knocked off to use as a water pump.

For the Intellectually Curious members of the NES, here is the south-up cuneiform map of Degilbo, all as discovered and translated by Bernie. The blank circle at 3 o'clock is WA and the one at 9 o'clock is Bone. The blank circle at 10 oclock is vitally important as that is the Drug Squad looking for Blue Meth production. Woowoonga Creek is obviously as important as DG's sacred 5 streams of the apocalypse. PS ... Is Degilbo really the arse-about spelling of Obliged? And here is the original before Bernie sorted it out.

..... while the TV was idly playing in the background. And that is when Bernie glanced up and saw his 1st program of Breaking Bad, looked at Walter's RV then considered his own, looked at Walter and gave consideration to his own bad-boy image, then considered how much time Walter was dedicating to his production of Blue Meth and resolved that this left plenty of time to still do justice to his Frill Neck research. So there you have it dear readers, as you have witnessed the precise time that Degilbo became twinned with Daraweit Gwim as the Blue Meth production hubs of the east coast, and when the .....

Crappy is impressed, as this is very perceptive by OT. But Crappy knows that most NESers are intellectually active and curious, so they would all know that all cuneiform tablets also contain a map of the known world which shows points of interest and intellectual highlights. The blank section at mid left of Crappy's tablet represents WA. ..... that Doubtfire had been taking lessons from Krissy, and Bernie had become the BRS of Degilbo, because when Bernie went down to the Degilbo Pattiserie & Coffee Shop on Coringa Rd for his usual triple shot Latte and freshly baked Pane-Chocolate, seated around him in the outdoor eating area overlooking the beautiful vista of Woowoonga Creek & the Cemetery, were photographers from Channels 9 & 7 + a kid from the Degilbo All Denominations Private School who had taken a freelance subcontract from Channel 10 to see if he could get an up-skirt type closeup of BTP or BTDFOD as he had become known ... Bernie-The-Persuitee, or Bernie-The-Dezi-Freeman-Of-Degilbo. With the hundreds of Outside Broadcast vans in the main street, plus the thousands of usual tourists doing the Degilbo self-guided adventure tour, Bernie decided to bugger off up to the "Good Night Scrub" National Park and to "Paradise" Dam, both of which had been named by Bernie after he and Doubtfire had spent a torrid night consummating their affair (Doubtfire always fell for Bad Boys) and, it is a little known fact that .....

Apologies for the delay Bernie, but I had to wait for the mud to dry, and because of the size of the tablet, I have had to omit the full list of my qualifications and awards.

No worries Turbs, as I will send him a message in cuneiform script.

Come on Bernie, remove the didgit.

This is obviously a post that Bernie would wish to respond to, so Cappy, ever the gentleman and mate, will allow that to occur.

Not many people know that Turbo holds the Guiness Record for being told that by good looking females, ............ and by quite a mass of scrubbers too, but to now also be in record contention for being told that by various AI ladies (Tubb always opts for the lady's voice) is a new low, or achievement, depending on how you rate such things.

..... it, and once Cleo (to her mates) realised what had happened, she also recalled that this snake had been shown several times in a bible picture book that she had loved to read as a little kiddie. With near to her last gasps, Cleo realised that this was the same snake that had given Eve the apple and after taking advice from her Soothsayer named Alexa, she said "Geeez Louise, this bloody same snake has appeared as the Bronze Serpent (ref Numbers 21:4–9 & John 3:14–15), as the Viper that bit Paul on Malta when he was shacked up with a Maltese Princess and having a break from active apostilling (ref Acts 28:3–6), and then finally as his(or her) big final gig as the Cosmic Serpent/Dragon (see Revelation 12 and 20)". "Heck, you know a lot of religious stuff Alexa" said Cleo as the poison took effect. "No wuckers, Cleo" responded Alexa "And you can cut the over dramatization as it's just a run of the mill python and while they might give you a nasty nip (Noburef) on the nork, they are not fatal". "Well tell Markanthony to get his arse in here quickly for a final one, just in case you are wrong ..... and tell Bernie to watch his step with that snake when he comes across it in a few thousand years .... although I know that he is a tough nut and is much more worried about Eastern Browns & Red Bellied Blacks out there around Degilbo". Alexa took Cleo's instructions seriously, remembered Bernard's name (Bernie to his mates and the Wreck Frying aviation community) + his day after Xmas '46 DOB, and ......

.... poor Bernie, who pushed him (or her ... NTTIAWWT) away and said "It'll take more than a few poxy scales to stop me from becoming archaeologically famous, ......... and rich, so f........

.... a pile of rocks, which it knocked over, and there under the rocks was a cuneiform tablet which Bernie could read, and which said "This tablet, and the bloke what wrote it, are much more ancient than those Tepe joints 450 kms up north". "This will make me more famous than Howard Carter and Bruce Pascoe, or that bloke who discovered Algebra" said Bernie, as his thoughts turned to buying a bigger Prevost RV with all the royalties. Meanwhile, the Python got really snakey about this change to the storyline and the realisation that he was about to be written out if the NES, so he .....

Given his fame, Cappy can only assume that Bernie is applying his attention to archeological research around Degilbo, and may have located one of the 1st Nations (or whatever they are called now) megacities recorded by whatshisname (or whatever he is called now) in his book Dark Emu.

.... that Kurdish lady, which is way more serious and suggestive than just being wrapped around her lower half. Surprisingly, Bernie, who had been involved as a geologist in Kurdistan for half a century while trying to become even more famous by finding the precursor civilization to Gobekli Tepe, knew the Kurdish lingo and said "Ez jî bi marê xwe re lîstinê hez dikim" and they both fell about laughing before Bernie decided to go-the-grope, and the non-viper ...... Bernie wants to locate the mob who were hanging around in Kurdistan before the other mob who built this. (Not the cover and the walkway, but just the rocky bits).

..... but then he realized that he had made the fatal error that all herpetologists and ophioligists dread (or whatever are their new 1st Nations names), because (not many people, or whatever they are called now, know) that pythons & other constrictors are not Vipers. By way of further explanation, Crappy deleted the bottom half of the photo of the Kurdish lady, as that python is constricting around that lady's lower bits, and it may have appeared to be suggestively pornographic, such that younger readers and aviation stewed-ants would be badly influenced accordingly. His hoarse voice sounded just like ...... NESers will have noticed that Bernie has been adding comments at bottom right of several posts lately, so he and his converted bus are being drawn into the vortex of the NES, so Bernie and his RV are just about f#&$*d too, like the rest of us regulars.

.... explain what happened, people looked at him skeptically when he said "I have been kurdaitched" and everyone assumed that he had teamed up with some stunningly beautiful Kurdish lady who had taken his v..... This is a pretty ordinary image of a basic Kurdish woman, but you can see how it might have elicited OT's interest.

.... rag Kurdaitcha man (or whatever they are called now) who, in response, pointed his bone (or whatever they are called now) at .....

...... like a Fraser Island (or whatever it is called now) Dingo (or whatever they are called now) that had ....

... oblivion, until he realized that the word "flying" (avref) had been used and this was an activity in which he possessed extreme skills, muscle memory and ballet expertise. So, he deftly pirouetted, then demi-plié'd (made famous by Demi Moore in and the fillem "An Officer and a Gentleman") and he .....

This event made history, dear readers, as this was the 1st time that Krissy took her Box Brownie and recorded the teacher detaining bull ..... and it is a matter of law enforcement history that what became known as "the great billiard room detention" was the precursor of modern arrests at airports with media attendance .... and even at 11 she was "hot" and wore a Cadbury chocolate as a medal (see evidence below). ..... their relationship blossomed as their eyes met, just before bull's eyes wandered down to where they usually did (many ladies took offence at this, but bull also had a lot of success), and he ..... Her initial medal ..... but the chocky is a bit stale by now.