Captain

..... qualify for the GYFTS program (NTTIAWWT), who won't blab to some future Republican Commission and .....

....hang around public toilets soliciting.....

...... Minties and ...........

.........people were lurking around ready to give him the dreaded "Unhelpful" Tag, which in turn triggered the awful digit after the forward slash in "likes"Although Turbo had held back from this despicable action to save his childhood friend Ratso from the scar of a forward slash digit, Ratso had branded Turbo for all time with the slur (the other two coming from 13 yo nerds), and............

......... one of the 13 year olds replied "I may well be a foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious, or alternatively I may be a single-minded expert in a particular technical field, but at least my world-wide moniker isn't TurdBro and unlike you, I don't ...............

.....apparently shoot down 747's and take out certain engines mid-flight, get caught in aileron hinges, contaminate the environment, and send the Murdoch Press into fibulations, and .................

....... are well known for breaking Jab thru-bolts and Axe exhausts.

"How do you know that?" asked Turdy.

"Because U AV to fix them" replied Andy who, in preparation for the upcoming elections, was busy glad-handing RA-Oz members, kissing babies and making babies at every possible opportunity, especially when ............

........... it was explained that nobody discusses something as passé as a "Model Aircraft" anymore.

And the GhostDog continued to circle waiting for the chance to attack.

"Yes Tink. Get with the program, dude, you dinosaur" said Salty, then added "Here pup" and continued "These days "Model Aircraft" are known as UAV's, even when flown on a control line using a rat-racer design powered by a 1.5 cc Taipan diesel. And being a UAV, you can ................

......his old aircraft back, so he could stuff up his landings, incurse, and get lost between the two Waggas and Henty."I'm desperate" he said, "I'd fly anything, even a Jab"

 

Madge thought about this for a wile and said "You......................."

............ would be a shoe-in if you apply to be a CFI ...................... which in your case would stand for ...................

My Aunt was sitting out in the garden writing her diary with her pen and drinking her usual nightcap of a couple of bottles of red .......... (Johnny Walker) .......... when she made the observation that the consumption of too much alcohol over a long period can adversely affect your memory ......... and even worse, it can badly affect your memory.

langorous lingerie and lissom limbs...", at which point he began to sweat in a most unattractive way...

......... which was pretty normal for a lascivious locksmith who longs for ...........

My Aunt is very disappointed that Andy's election statement does not make a feature of his contributions to the NES and she deplores the fact that he has tried to hide the entire series of hat incidents.

.....likes to lick long.....

...... loquacious lizard-like ladies (or locksmiths) who lack ....................

"Ahhh.... g'day", real suave like...

...... "I am Hermione the haemophilic hermaphrodite who ..................

..............Andy shat up with a start at the word ambitious. "I've always wanted to fly an ambitious aircraft" he said "It would be wonderful to be flying along, see a large lake, and have the choice of ................."

....... hitting blue bits instead of always worrying about hitting the green or brown bits (AvRef) after the amplitude of my PIO's (AvRef) increased when I scoff down a handful of amphetamines (ChemiRef), which some might consider to be amphibolous, then land (OptimisticRef) on the blue bits, hit a few amphipods, then amble over to the ample chested amoral amnionic amoeba who runs the Blue Oyster and say ".................

...wondering which hand to use. Should I be ambiguous and use both of them or.....

........ be ambidextrous and use both (like the 12 incher can & does), or be ambivalent and use none, or be ambitious & ............

.........which is quite different to a square wave or a sine wave, in a quantum physics aspect. The lee wave tends to created a sonic effect which in turn sets up a frequency vibration in the through.......

............ the entire CWA network when the monthly magazine featured an article titled "How frequently do you use your vibrator?".

Madge replied via a letter to the Editor which said "Almost daily." and Madge's revelation was then discussed around every tea urn & sandwich spread in the country (plus the blokes having a mid-morning scotch down at the Men's Shed couldn't stop wondering where Madge lives so that they could see more of her vibrator and her Fowler Flap), then she continued "Because I have sore feet and that Dawn Fraser advert got me ................

..."its a well known fact that the listener hears better when the brain isn't being bothered by images of ugliness from the eyes"......"Being male, or so we are lead to believe but have no evidence for or against that proposition, Tubs does better when his brain only has to focus on one thing and that's why......."

..... when Turbs is with Madge, he can only look at them one at a time.

"His heads swings from side to side like he is watching a ping pong game" said Madge "And the side to side swing of his melon builds up an oscillation (AvRef) which makes his ........

EDITORIAL NOTE .............. The Editor notes Ahlox's huge left hand in the photo in post # 9150. Is that a man-hand, or what?

In contrast, consider Turbo's left wrist (NTTIAWWT) which is also consistent with some of his many posts.

With that moustache and haircut (and wrist), not to mention the uniform and jackboots that he always wears when driving his Corvette, you can see why Turbo was such a hit at the last G&L Mardi Gras.

Your Editor contends that Ahlox's huge left hand is consistent with his performance as a Moderator on Wreck Flying and comes (sic) from many years of left-handed .................

........ the section of the Authority that oversees RA OZZ, except for the bit about Eva Braun which was onsold to Ahlot for use in his character study for his appearance in his self written play at the Blue Oyster, which he had tentatively called The Eva Braun Follies or Fun with AH, or ...........

........... EvaLocks - The Gay Icon (NTTIAWWT), or .....................

AHLOCKS IN COSTUME AND IN CHARACTER DURING A BREAK IN REHEARSALS, PLAYING OPPOSITE TURBO. There are rumours in the Gumly Gumly Chronicle or a romantic entanglement, both on and off the set.

........ the section of the Authority that oversees RA OZZ, except for the bit about Eva Braun which was onsold to Ahlot for use in his character study for his appearance in his self written play at the Blue Oyster, which he had tentatively called The Eva Braun Follies or Fun with AH, or ...........

EDITOR'S SPECIAL NOTE ......................

All new Forum Members should note Andy's thru-bolt adjustment tool and exhaust valve special removal tool that is located in pride of place on the rock in that above photo. He takes it everywhere that he goes (because he HAS to).

That same tool is used to "true" Axe crankshafts & to adjust exhaust systems prior to re-welding, although in that case the tool is imported from Europe and is 50% more expensive.

Signed .......... The Editor and the Wreck-Flying Special Moderatti Panel

....... .................. but my fee was also to be paid in BHP Shares which is blue-chip script that I needed to exchange on the black member's market for a bulk quantity of thru-bolts, exhaust valves & water-proof hats, however the script with which I have actually been paid was from .............

......... a blue-movie which was partially written in sanskrit (a suspect sacrilegious sanskrit script) in which the 12 Incher starred back in 1971, when ................

Ma tante has located her plume out in the jardin and dropped me a note this morning to make the very relevant point that when the theatre manager in post # 9143 described the CASA rump-checkers as the "most fun, friendly and erudite that had ever attended any of their performances", that doesn't mean all that much as all previous performances had been in H Division at Pentridge.

ANDY'S STAR'S DRESSING ROOM IN PENTRIDGE (Note the new-fangled appliance in the corner that has saved the lives of several hats).

.........."Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work we go............" which drew a rousing cheer and standing ovation from the audience, which on that night consisted of a block booking of the Ramp Checking department of CASA who.....

....... the theatre manager declared as the most "fun", friendly and erudite group that he had ever had attend any of their performances. "Those CASA Ramp-Checkers are a laugh a minute ..... and so worldly wise, yet down to earth." he added.

"They are not fun-guys" responded Ratso "They are more like toad's-tools."

And the same judgement was later passed by a shop down the road from the theatre which sold adult marital aids.

Then Andy piped up to take the gloss of that magical evening. "When Tink mentioned a problem with the script in his post #9140, not only was he referring to the crappy content of the writing, or the fact that it was printed in Kaiserzeit Gotische calligraphy .................. but my fee was also to be paid in BHP Shares which is blue-chip script that I needed to exchange on the black member's market for a bulk quantity of thru-bolts, exhaust valves & water-proof hats, however the script with which I have actually been paid was from .............

"...........I don't know how to flyyyyyeeeee", but trouble was brewing with the script.......

.......... which was medieval Kaiserzeit Gotische calligraphy that Andy couldn't read properly (and as all of you NES thespians know, a script written in script is a pain in the arse to perform), however when he sang the 1st verse of "I don't know how to flyyyyyeeee" the CASA Inspector and the RA-Oz Ops Manager jumped from the wings (TheatreRef) in tandem (SkydivingRef), checked the status of his latest BFR (AvRef) ("What the **** is a BFR?" chanted Andy), then they handcuffed (BondageRef) Andy while they sang that rousing duet .................

......is expected to seamlessly float out above the audience while singing..................

............ a duet with Marcia Hines (although Andy, as ever, would have preferred a 3-Way) in a rendition of that well known song from JC Superstar, .......................

....Urgin Mary, is going to be the Choirboy - silent of course, but sure to be a hit in his little red jumpsuit. Epaulette is going to be the newborn baby Jesus, and Ahlot will be the lamb. Ratso of course is the donkey, Salty , B12 and-bull will be the three wise men from the East, and......

....... Madge will play the Virgin who is an Urchin that needs no Urge'n. (But can he remember back that far to those days when he was unsullied ..... you may well ask?).

Turbo will continue his Forum role as Satan, then double as Lucifer (and we'll see how long it takes Ahlow to extinguish THOSE fires), The 12 Incher will get it out and do double duty as the Snake (Like Peter Sellers in Dr Strangelove), Eeeeeen will play Noah to save us from PPrune two by two, but the starring role will be Andy and his Hat who will take the role as Abraham, then glam-up to play every one of the Angels (except Doc Neeson) ..... however I do hope that Andy wears new undies then keeps his legs together when he flaps his wings as they lift him up on those wires, when he .................

.........© That Jesus really was the fifth member of the Beatles ...

The TurdBoy has raised a very interesting point here which Ratty and Ahpox often ponder in great detail over their weekly coffee and cake philosophical discussions while looking at the ladies walk past in Baylis St (NTTIAWWT).

Whereas there are numerous depictions of HaMashiach Yeshua from 2000 years ago, below is an actual photo of the Save-Your getting ready to rock.

You read it first here folks and the NES breaks new religious ground, yet again, where the cult of the Hannover Holey Tram was borne, Yoko & that sheila that recently dumped Paul have been booked for next year's Nativity Play ...... and praise be to our Good & Chief Shepherd, St Madge of the Blessed .............

My Aunt has belatedly asked me to clarify that in the interests of religious harmony and to maintain the status quo (another band that he may have dabbled in), Hesus is not the left handed one, otherwise the Brothers would have belted the right-handed kids on the back of their hand with a ruler.

...... orv-course-it-will, eh" replied-bull "well,-eventually-anyway-if'n-I-can-keep-it-point'n-ruffly-in-the-right-direction, which-is ...............

............ supine-and-with-these-black-round-softish-things (AvRef) {editor's note ... The Editorial Panel believe that bull is referring here to his "wheels" (AvRef) unless perhaps he has other round softish things that hang down below him ....... which are also black} pointing-down-and basically-below-me,,,, which-would-be ................

".........You might be a space man, but will that two stroke make a full stop at 300 feet [full of avrefs PLaney], or......."

...... orv-course-it-will, eh" replied-bull "well,-eventually-anyway-if'n-I-can-keep-it-point'n-ruffly-in-the-right-direction, which-is ...............