Captain

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

think about what might happen if CT was convicted of animal cruelty and banned from owning an Airport.

If he quietly helped things along a little by leaking to the Newspapers that there was a scandal at DG, and  dropping a few leaflets around saying how he had been an exceptional Airport Director on the Khyber Pass, he might just be able to rake in the money that CT was getting, so he ...................

..... initiated a major publicity blitz with a view to totally discrediting the CT.

The main tenets of his push to rubbish that CT of a bloke was "He flies a plastic fantastic, so not really a proper AUF type person (where you need to be grey, stooped, a little bitter and fly 2-stroke rag & tube), he is a member of ISIS & Hamas, plus he voted Yes and is of tribal descent." ........... and that is precisely where he stuffed up, as the Press Conference immediately disolved in mayhem.

"That's no good" said one of the reporters "That's a non-event & we can't report that, as those tribal dudes can kill wombats to their heart's content (the little ones always taste the best), turtles, dugongs, puppies, little pussies, baby koalas and ......

..... one of the wombat's little nippers who had just learnt to walk and was at maximum cuteness, so had come along to show her dad how lovely she was. 

Some say CT deliberately pulled the shot onto the nipper, yet others claim ....

The baby wombat ..... pre the small hole in the front bit.

32 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....."woke" and immediately raked in $27 million in the first week, so he ................

.... sent Crappy a 20% commission and said "Keep those statements and actions coming, son, and then .....

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....it’s bringing in millions each day.

Turbo also reserved P$ssed to make Royalties off Cappy but it has been slow going.

So .......

...

 Turdo went to the next best thing, which, with Crappy, was .....

.... the fact that the internet word "post" is derived from the TMBC patent for his Posty Bike and therefore attracts a great deal of annual revenue because Turbo recovered his crappy decision about the bike, by licensing the word to Marky Mark Z and more lately to Elon at X, where .....

4 hours ago, bull said:

.....and totally missed the tram and collided with CT on his posty bike as he went down the shop for a bottle of milk. Now that same milk was all over his............

.... person, and his posty bike, which was an early model designed and developed by the Turbine Motor Bicycle Corporation before they did their deal to sell the design to the fledgling Honda Motors (in one of his few business errors Turbs was heard to say "The post office will never buy bikes to deliver the mail, so we may as well flick this horizontal single piston, 4 stroke, step-thru design, even at a huge loss"). The design was therefore subject to .....

21 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......wrench the two ...................................

.... of them from under Loxie's .....

44 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

...and looking around, ran up the first thing he saw which was Loxy’s leg. Ahlocks.........

..... initially tried to reject the feeling, but found that while somewhat reviled by the notion, he enjoyed the pain as the wombat used his large claws and considerable weight to ......

.... as the shockwave knocked them base over apex he said, surprisingly calmly, "Oh, that .......

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

The owner wouldn't sell on principle; he said it belonged in GG, but now the fire was racing towards that little shed, still intact but with a lean caused by that slide and it was Loxy's job to .........................

 

..... enter the shed to remove the 7 x 44s of avgas, the 12 x 10 kg bottles of propane, the 40 pallets of stolen cans of "Start ya Bastard" and the ......

33 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......wombat hole while fighting a grass fire beind the Pub.

Why he did that when it was the grass that was on fire may nevet be known, but after 30 minutes the fire had spread to 2.2 square kilometers and the hole wasn't going anywhere, or so we thought,but then the side of the hill liquefied and slid down through GG as the locals call it.

Under normal circumtances this would have been no loss, but in an old shed was the original Facet Opal, almost the original Ultralight and a cornerstone of the AUF in its day.

It was now f.....................

..... rustratingly for the a europeans, and for the Darraweit Guimians, called a Fright Design CnT 101 .....

11 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Once when we were helping out in Grong Grong ....

..... my trusted lieutenant put his hose in a .....

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

bottle the POH fell down, and that was 678 pages!

In desperation he struck a match .......

..... and radiod to Ahlox "G'day Loxie ..... Your face and my .......

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......of Wagga Wagga Draft.

He ......................

..... was .....

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

The old geyser started the engine, bounced it off the back of the trailer with a burst of throttle, took off between the posts down the road and started an aerobatics routine from ground level.  It was magnificent, with hammerhead stall after hammerhead stall after, well he had to pull out of the fifth one after he scraped the road with the fourth, but ......

...... that type of thing is the heart, soul & tradition of the DYM, so he just HAD to give it a go, with the chance of becoming a DYM Legend. He therefore pushed the throttle lever thingy even further through the firewall (you can do that in a beercan because of the wonderful properties of aluminimium), and the crowd gasped as the beercan lifted and clawed its way skyward like an FA18 at the Grand Prix, so when .....

3 hours ago, onetrack said:

 it was only some old geezer who looked like he was wearing a crocheted quilt, and who..........

...... had crocheted undies that were threadbare because .....

2 hours ago, onetrack said:

(Dear NES'ers, OT takes his hat off to Cappy for inventing the winning "new word of the week", with his "Parsiphical" contribution, which must have taken some time, along with a dictionary and a thesaurus, to "dream" up.....)

While your Crappy is a great bloke, dear NESers, he does not deserve this adoration from his Sand Groper colleague (ohh the sand, the sand) as Crappy fell asleep while trying to remember the names of Andy's cat characters, after Crappy originally didn't enjoy the performance and spat the furball so did not go back after intermission). This just shows that if Andy didn't have a Parsiphical Cat as a character, then he should have.

On 18/01/2024 at 6:11 PM, turboplanner said:

....the ill-fated Boxer powered Subaru called the Newvita.

The words were:

"Don't cry for me Riverina, I didn't buy one"

"I didn't ...................."

 

.... want one, the truth is I never liked one"

Then the crowd responded "What's the buzz, tell us what's happening, what's the buzz, Caiaphas?"

Loxie then responded with some stuff about a Parsiphical cat wearing a dream coat while standing at the barricades speaking french and feeling Les Miserable ....... so the crowd immediately switched off and went back to concentrating on topless chick's, XXXX, who has the best swag, and .....

7 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......came up with the Ute Muster Dream Scene and got 3.8 million views of FB in the first month.

It ..................

.... was described by Mr Turbinestein as "A triumph akin to what little Andy Lloyd Weber-BBQ achieved with his ditty about .....

16 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....rotor and started to sing "The wheels on the bus go round round round" and the chorus of choreographed actors chipped in with "round round round" and the Elvis air to ground speaker, which normally swears at firebugs and tells them they'll be caught! chimed in with, the final "round, roumd round" .....

.... however "round, round round" did not satisfy the Uteys that were into punk rock, or those with a hankering for Slim Dusty ..... nor the Gay Uteys Collective (the GUC) who were all Chad Morgan fans.

This gave the Skippy composing duo of Onesie & Turbinestein a challenge that took them 55 minutes to overcome, when they .....

5 hours ago, turboplanner said:

"Elvis has not left the building!" he said, but there was not much laughter. Instead ..............

..... an Anne Margaret impersonator, who did look somewhat like bull, red hair and all, came (walked, not came) down the catwalk to the main stage and looked Elvis in the .....

2 hours ago, onetrack said:

Ahlow thought for a few seconds, and then said, "That's great! - and the fees are fine by me! Just send the bill to.........

.... Turbine Promotions, who promote and manage the Ute Muster, and they will look after you, as an Elvis coming in will not only solve my problem, it will put on a good show for the punters and it will clean the joint up by blowing away the rubbish, condom wrappers and the problematic .....

Crappy apologises for the double bugger post. Internet is very dodgy here in the Exumas.

..... that the Ute Muster crowd went mad, as they are prone to do.

Because he was still tethered to the Ute, Loxie could not fly(avref) back to Denni International Air & Space Port, so he took an alternative approach and .....

..... that the Ute Muster crowd went mad, as they are prone to do.

Because he was still tethered to the Ute, Loxie could not fly(avref) back to Denni International Air & Space Port, so he took an alternative approach and .....