Captain

..... , but that didn't stop him from standing on the parapet at Masada and singing the praises of Eddie and Bucks. "Geez" said BeBe "If we can get this Hezbollah trainer johnny to sew harmony between the Cats and the Magpies, we can have additional faith in getting our 2-tooth Hamas problem under control." However, Chris Scott stuck his beak in and added "...........

...... had trouble during training when their little hats fell off as they took their training kicks for goal. Chris Scott had for months been saying that a training camp at Masada was questionable, and this was proven true, when Patrick Dangerfield fell off the Masada Fort site after handballing an IDF supplied Intercom to the Hezbollah (ex-Collingwood) trainer ........

...... he had hit the Damascus to Jerusalem water supply pipe and the desert was quickly becoming flooded, eventually to fill the Dead Sea and form a resort. "I'll just say nothing, they'll never know, and I'll buy up the Masada hills as my family home, my boy" he said to the young Bedouin Achmed bin Turdybine, who replied that "........

..... he has been banished to Masada to dig up some more scrolls. It was either that or go undercover in Tehran, which was a bit of an issue for him as he has ringlets that go down to his nipples & the matchbox on his forehead has been superglued on. So Masada it was and to keep him company we sent him a .......

.... which encouraged him to play his standard reprise of "Hubble, bubble, toil and trouble" and then the highlight of the night "It's long way to the top if you want to sing a sonnet", where he finished up smashing his lute, wearing school shorts and being pelted by lady's farthingales & breeches. It is a great credit to the NES to have a subject describing the current issues of the State of Israel, concurrently while examining the musical tastes of the Shakespearian era. The NES has therefore been now elevated to academic excellence and while this is a bit intimidating for someone of Cappy's modest intellect, Turbo is thriving.

But not the Banjo or the Uke, which were exempt as part of a group of instruments that included the Piano-Accordion, the Jew's Harp and the mouth organ.

...... originally assumed that this was an attack by the IDF because they had misspelt it & thought that Achmed bin Turbine (Turbo's real name is Archy) was a Hammas spokesperson, but that was incorrect and Mossad have this morning sent through an apology, which said " ......

As a student of Phsychology for the Working Man (PftWM) Cappy has written a thesis for his post doctorate award and he postulates for the 1st time in human history that the above lines are a metaphor for the power of music to move and affect the human soul. The reason is that in Shakespeare's time, sheep's guts were used to make strings for musical instruments such as the lute, the viola & the violin. EEEan - In addition to the AOs, given the heights to which the NES has soared (avref) recently, may we please have a new Forum title for Aviation Philosophy.

As someone with a PhD is Philosophy, although it's only from Melbourne Uni's Moorabbin campus, I hang on his every word and I have heard Turbo express that many times, although he usually says "Wow, man, that's really deep" . However the singularroot or bull will surely provide the explanation of what Billy S had in mind when he penned those lines.

......, consider the 110-octane leaded option that has popped up at all airports, where the guts-to-octane ratio almost tops the ...... And to satisfy Cappy's philosophical nature, he just pops in the following for NESer's interest, which is one of Cappy's favourite sayings, although he doesn't get too many opportunities to use it at Garden Parties or Fly-Ins.

...... that the present world shortage of binoculars has been caused by the Martians buying them all up and cutting them in half, prior to ingesting them with a sauce made from .......

And one of the last times that Starlink's satellites were ever doggy-doodoos splatter free.

...... which are automatically ejected towards the Sony Music HQ, but which have been giving Starlink grief because some are splattering on the antennae of their satellites, hence Cappy's Starlink dropping out sometimes when he wants to log into the NES. "Don't mention logs" said Elon "As it is Nipper's that are giving us so many problems, and he must be a world champion as to quantity, because .......

.... as Nipper the RCA dog had just strangled one over beside the phonograph and they didn't want Roy or Chet to step in it (but they didn't seem to care too much about One-string or bull, although bull, who had the nose of a beagle [in both sensitivity and appearance] then quietly said to One-string "geez louise onesie, did you do that?"). Roy and Chet carefully ...... Here is Nipper, pretending that he hadn't done it over the back in the shade behind the gramophone. But he does look thinner.

..... ppreciably formidable fangs, while others were just barring up for a ......

..... him a kiss, then made a hand gesture which suggested that Albo might be a w.......

Twiggy has just given me a call and NESers will be pleased to hear that the Colombian kiddie, seen in this picture on the right, has acclimatized well and just 8 days after joining the mining crew, he has this week been promoted to the position of foreman. He is a born leader, and production has increased as a result.

..... that was a shame for the Shaman. [bull stevens is soon to release "shame for the sharman" on a new album, which is sung to the tune of Tea for the Tillerman]. bull immediately sparked up and said "hola, old mate, so what's ya name and where did you get that useless yellow stuff from?". "My name is Dr Twiggy Sharman and I have been digging for that yellow stuff using a Panamanian government subsidy, which I am about to declare to have been a failure, so that they will consider the pesos (they are actually called Balboas in Panama, but Peso sound more romantic) as p1ssed up against the wall and I will then absorb the company into my 407K3 pension fund which is administered by the Guna Accounting Corporation (the GAC) that is based in the tax free San Blas Islands. "well" said bull "you seem very well set up and have obviously taken some good advice." "No sh1t, Sherlock" replied Twiggy. "what is your cost of production?' asked bull, probing for all of the good data. "Bugger all" replied Twiggy "As we use underage orphans from Colombia and they ....... Below are all of the Board member administrators of Twiggy's 407K3, with 2 new Colombian mine workers. The Board members look after the kiddies until they stop whinging about the conditions down in the pit. (Note how Twiggy Shaman has always been progressive & ahead of his time by the quota of females on his Board).

..... using the converted dentist's chair with the new stirrups welded on, which bull always takes with him for such occasions, he invited .....

..... were ready to take on Liberace and Elton John (who cannot be differentiated from Liberace these days) in the Vegas Strip show scene. bull's son was also keen to race down and reduce the number of virgins, but the more experienced bull suggested that they just stroll down to the enclosure of maidens and .......

..... under cover display of Corvettes from the Turbine family collection (which kicked the asses of the Jay Lenno and Adam Corolla collections, combined). However, finding a venue big enough to house this 'vette collection was not as hard as locating 16 certified virgins to wear the maidens' costumes (as a practicing Gyno it was Cappy who was asked to do the inspections and certifications), and that .....

..... , looking for a promotion headline, he arranged for Lionel Rose to challenge Mike Tyson & Cassius Turbine to a WWF style tag team boxing match. The ticket sales, all handled by a JV between TurboTek & TickeTurd, went crazy and even Choc Mundine and his dad bought front row seats next to bull & Connor McGregbine, where they ......

..... and doing a Chinese/Vietnamese Siamese-twins, ass conjoined double-act outside Jimmy Turbine's Boxing Tent at the Easter Show.

..... was searching for a new chant that would keep the lefties occupied for a few years. And then it came to him ... "From the (Chagres) River to the Canal, Lefties will always be anal", which became the official ......

...... assumed, which you should never do [see Footnote below], that because they were 100% non-catholic, that they must all be Jewish and that Panama is the new homeland. That made Colombia & the Darian Gap the new West Bank, and Costa Rica is Syria, so Turbo saw himself as the new Golda Meir, and because he looked so similar he decided to fill the power vacuum by ....... Cappy can't remember whether he took the below pic of Golda in her prime (Cappy was a leader in the Knesset at that time) or Turbo during his over-the-ears long hair trans experimentation phase, and you can't tell as they look identical (and have never both been seen in the same room at the same time). [That badge is from the Red Corvette Owner's Association, but that doesn't help identify the photo as Golda had one too and used to take Cappy for a Friday night cruise up the main drag in Jerusalem, before they went parking up on lover's lane at the Golgotha lookout]. Footnote - Wise saying from Confucius Fong from Cabramatta NSW ....... "All NESers should never ASSUME anything .... as if you do it will make an ass out of U and me."