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Captain

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Everything posted by Captain

  1. The below photo has just come across Cappy's desk, relating to a separate criminal matter that was so serious & erky perky that I refused to represent the person involved. But as a matter of interest, one of those shown below is our old aviation buddy & Wagga X 2 fairy AHlocks, when in his prime. I think that he is the skinny bloke on the left, because I know that Locksy gets giddy when sitting up high on the engine.
  2. .... elected as Mayor each year, and .....
  3. .... in 1953, when Maisy Murdoch committed the unforgiveable, and unforgettable, public act, which still gets her ....
  4. .... also a few of the CWA cake bakers/sellers. It is a bit disrespectful for Turbs to refer to bull by the epithet "it", because as he well knows, this was our very own dear bull, as demonstrated by the lack of a capital "B". Our NES occasional compatriot, bull, had been doing the same Rodeo circuit as has Turbo, and as mentioned by Tubb in his last post, possibly the same "Chicks", and someone (probably a competitor who hated bulls good looks and other charms) lit the stream of toilet paper when bull came out of the thunder box with the paper accidentally caught is the back of his stubbies, so there was action aplenty when the fire burnt all the way up to his ......
  5. .... be an undercover Jedi Knight, although the light sabre was a bit of a give-away whilst under cover, so he developed a procedure to insert it wrapped in a condom, like the drug mules do, but an accidental triggering of a light sabre when in that position could cauterize a ....
  6. .... and that's easy for Turbo, as opposed to the rest of us on Wreck Frying, who are judt mere mortals and who therefore, each day have to strive & .....
  7. .... enough to buy a tank of fuel and a ....
  8. .... on the way to the MCG to play The Pomms the next time they tour. His plan is to just chuck the same ball that ruined Mike Gatting's career, after all, how hard can this caper be, then bask in the glory and the adoring ladies + get a promotional gig with Advanced Hair Studio and also a ......
  9. .... a rug with Liz Hurley and believes that he can now join the Aussie cricket team, as he has been where Warny has been and thinks that it can't be too hard to also chuck a ball with a bit of spin on it. So, his baggy Green is on the ......
  10. .... ing rings for her royal offspring, one of whom is the spit of Turbo, and has become well known recently because of.....
  11. ..... before she became Queen, and thereafter Turbo was always up to .....
  12. The opportunity to see big tips is the main attraction of the see thru mirrors.
  13. Turbo is 100% Tom C, and this is one of his advantages, as he only needs a shallow trench when up the Khyber, and he can fit into his 'Vette without banging his head. Tubb/Tom also did all of the flying scenes live in Top Gun. Cappy now awaits more dots from Turdy, so that the NES can continue, and our hundreds of readers, (and Bernie), can enjoy the Tome as we plough on towards 2000 pages.
  14. .... they have see thru mirrors in the changerooms, and they invite people of Turbo's significance to sit in the secret lounge chairs, with coffee & cake, to enjoy the show, and then take advantage of the .....
  15. Dear NES crew, I am reliably informed by one of his concubines that Turbo experienced the earth shake for him at 2 am yesterday. However it was just a 4.7 quake at his Korumburra Equine, Wagu & Hunting Estate (with 4000 m paved strip)
  16. ...., yet TP still looks "hot" IMHO, and that must be due to the Turbine family's genes, which are obviously....
  17. ... a picture of my grandma, who is about the same age, as .....
  18. ..... turned off the special "Dodge the Muijarabeam" feature of the autopilot. "Wow" said the Hostie "That thing really does crank (Turboref) up the G's when it gets to 90 degrees of bank, as my nickers have fallen down due to the extreme force that you used to dodge the Moodyjarahbeams. You are my hero Cappy, and I'd like to reward you with a ......
  19. ....., who had the Avid Flyer fitted with a 5 axis autopilot, with all the buttons pressed and active, so he was sitting back with his feet on the dash & fiddling with one of the hosties, who had brought him 5 frozen maggots + a cheese & onion sanga, as an excuse to ......
  20. .... was however, as is often the case with Cappy, overcum with Sundat holiness, and had also developed a taste for maggots,especially frozen, after his time in a Siberian Gulag, because of what he did to ....
  21. .... which was a special festival on their religious calendar, and the Hindu god Sundat was looking down on everyone and enjoying the spectacle. Sundat is the god of Self-Abuse, so the crowd were getting right into it, and they were .....
  22. ..... , just like the difference in the way the dates are expressed in the US, in the Riverina the correct emergency number to call is 119, but always take care to use the 2nd 1 first, or your call will be diverted to a scam joint in Vietnam. The VicPol walloper punched in 119, but in her panic used the wrong 1 first, and suddenly a voice like "Hanoi Helen" came on the line and she say "Ten dorrar prease" and then ".....
  23. .... until the cute little VicPol copper ca......
  24. No wuckers Turbo, as "All that work on the doubtful" is always a perfect excuse."
  25. .... and when questioned by VicPol, Turbo just explained that his yellow Taser was just a new range of yellow Tens machines. The VicPol copper said to Turbo that she had a bad back and a Tens treatment had been recommended by her Specialist, so Turbo told her to lie down and relax while he dialed up the taser to George Floyd/ Mosque Priest levels and he .......
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