Captain

Gee Whizz, :big_grin: I'm back too. Now there's a coincidence........

(OK Le Crappy, your que I think..... (exit stage left...) AbstinancePete

In the interests of propriety :black_eye:, Le Crappeee has nothing to add.

If Planey :heart: and Petey :broken_heart: may have had a tryst :yin_yan:, an assignation, a get-together, a rendezvous, a centratante, a , a :pig:, a :devil:, or a , it is purely up to the consenting adults involved and not for Le Crap to discuss further or pass judgement.

And according to the rules of these forums (or is it fora) and the manner in which all members use nom-de-plumes (or is it nom-de-pla) there remains no way to know for sure whether or which of them is a bloke thumb_down or boke-ette :thumb_up: (or which of them played which of those roles ), so I will just stay schtumm and leave it to other contributors to make up their own minds.

(However Le Krap does have it on good authority that prosperousbutnotportlyPete is not 37-25-36 (although he may possibly be 37 high ), and while he may have had the wood on Planey , he has not been to the Oaks for some time ..... although I cannot and will not say what deviatePete does with knotholes ).

It is also none of our business whether feelingviolatedPete is a mortar-scratcher or a pillow-biter, however I suspect that he will be watched more closely by Ian and the other Forum Police at Avalon next March, then at Narromine next Easter, and at the impending Echuca Fly-In.

Kind regards to all

Crappy QC, GJ, TCC

The pen of my Pete has been in ??

Well said Hiho.

But your faithful Barista is a suspicious salacious solicitous salty seadog, and poses the following innocent question:

If Planey, through his own admission, goes away for a week to play snake charmers with his 37-25-36 "friend", and UptonogoodPete just happens to go off the air at the same time, then 12 good men and true could, I contend, only arrive at the following possible logical conclusions:

1 Planey is BigPete.

2 BigPete is 37-25-36 and is actually goodlookaPeta.

3 Planey has been bitten by the snake and and paramedicPete is sucking the poison out.

4 ParamedicPete may actually be ParalyticPete and morallyendangeredPete.

5 Planey can't remember where he put the tablets.

6 It is all a massive missunderstanding.

7 Planey did remember where he put the tablets and it is massive.

8 Planeys 37-25-36 may become 39-58-41 in about July '09.

9 This is all a huge coincidence and falselyaccusedPete is actually innocentPete.

10 Planey may not survive the entire episode, and they'll never be able to close the coffin lid.

After all, what other conclusions could there be? ..............................

Regards

Le Crap

Planey's pencil is in ???????????????????

N.E.S. BREAKING NEWS

Planey buggers off for a week of debauchery and the N.E.S. grinds to a halt (a bit like Planey).

AllwashedOutPete is nowhere to be seen.

Julie Andrews is compromised and the von Trapp nippers are in danger.

From whence will any help come?

Sunday rolled around .........

While away, my laptop unit which is a :heart:37-25-36 :heart::hug:model, is unable to receive progress reports from the NES, and I too, hopefully, will be suitably distracted while playing my snake charmers flute which I got on prescription.;););)

Use extreme care with that stuff, Planey.

I know a bloke who took 2 of those snake charmer tablets because he had 2 ladies coming around to visit him. He ended up with both wrists in plaster after the girls didn't turn up.

As a highly credentialed Barista (good one Planey, wish I had thought of that), with considerable time in the Supreme court in MacQuarie St, and someone who has on rare occasions been called a w#nka myself, I can assist you with a coffee if you choose to sue either the snake or the charmer.

I am also pleased to report that Starchy Nell gave me a call yesterday morning and he doesn't sound like too bad a bloke, for a Starchy. Let me or Pete or Geoff know when you are ready to upgrade and we'll give you a reference that will get you through the boomgate in Bundy.

Obregard

Barista Vittoria Le Crappee

The coffee beans of my aunt are in the spresso machine

The popular missing Victorian flier BigPete - Who says and what proof do you have?

 

 

 

has this morning been found fit and well - Who says and what proof do you have? From the photo in the Chewka Daily which appeared in these forums, neither appear to be correct descriptions

 

MrPete is very well known for getting himself into tight situations - He is a bit prone, however that is not a correct description of the Riverland Lass

 

 

 

after fleeing with the Von Trapp family singers - He was almost von trapped on that occasion.

 

On this occasion, he had gone to visit FriarPuk for a few days to assist with looking after his sheep, but wound up washing socks by night instead. It would appear that last night he’d been allocated duties watching over the sheep while seated around a campfire with other drunken shepherds. The Friar is well known in the local community for his rather potent home-brew, of which more than generous allocation are issued, to keep out the cold night air. - I expect Pukky to issue legal proceedings if you go ahead with this as part of your article

 

During his ordeal, he’d had his wristwatch stolen and lost all track of time. - It is well known that Pete has trouble knowing what day it is, let alone what the big hand and little pointy hand are saying.

 

However, as the night wore on and every one started to fall asleep, hearing the Captains distant calls yodel-ay-eee yodel-ay-eee yodel-ay-eee groan" Now where is BloodyIKeepGettingCapturedPete this time?" he made his escape and wandered off into the darkness. - That is why the nursing home have issued him with the ankle bracelet (and tell him that it is a J160 to keep him happy {and pacified}).

 

Just as dawn was breaking, he was spotted by PC Plodd, who was making his way to be first in the que when Macca’s opened. - More legal action expected from Victoria's finest, or they'll shoot ya.

 

The well intoxicated flier was seen to be unsteady on his feet before falling over again.

 

When assistance arrived he was singing “While shepherds flogged my watch at night, while seated on the ground. An angel of the force came down and picked me off the groundâ€.:thumb_up::thumb_up::thumb_up:

 

It is good to know that he is expected to make a full recovery after a few strong coffee’s and a bit of sleep, before making a full report on the forums.- Can't wait for that one.

Planey.

The above was sent to me by the Managing Director of the Oaks and Bendigo Chronicle and is a true copy of the Editor's comments after this article was filed.

Due to the obvious questions that this raises, do you wish to consider your legal position after filing a copy on these forums?

Kind regards

Barrister Le Crap (a tortology, perhaps?)

The reporter's pen is in my aunt's back hallway.

hey cap though i was reading never ending story:loopy:;);) neil

Apologies also to Geoff for sidetracking his thread .

Just one comment on those pee bags. I have used them when going cross-country in my sailplane and they work quite well :star: .... however they should be insulated as I find that there are few things worse that the feel of body temperature pee thru a thin plastic bag ... however trying to keep it in when you are busting is certainly one of those worse feelings .

One of the joys of powered flight :thumb_up: is that you can land at the nearest strip, duck around behind a "Mens" tree and then take off again :thumb_up: :thumb_up:.

I trust that the above in-depth technical discussion of such core aviation matters is of interest to most forum members. If not, I apologise .. yet again.

Regards Geoff

PS - Can you help me out here Pelorus 32?

Even Pelorus 64 couldn't help you out of the pickle into which you have painted yourself.

Just do a search here on Jabiru to find the dipsticks - sorry Cap't I just couldn't help myself...Ian runs away in fear of being "mass murdered"

The trouble that you have , Ian, is that if the Jabiru owners take their high-winged bats and aircooled balls and go home, you will lose half of the members of the forum.

So there ............... (but your post was mildly amusing ... for a Rotax runner).

Regards Le Crapp

GynoPete :confused: is considering a career change ........... and help him mind the flock :thumb_up: for a while, up in the mountains said TheSoundOfMusicPete ......

(I hear it's not that far from Rootax land, I might be able to help them with the rough running...)

And rubberglovesPete's change of career has brought the NES almost full circle to post #189, with the Von Trapp kiddies waiting for him at the airport and that Julie Andrews sheila being mistaken by some idiot correspondant (that would be me) for Julie Anthony and Mary Poppins.

And Le Crappee being transmigrated into a Hauptman (again).

Auswedersehn

We haff ways of making you fix the pen that ist in ze garden

No Chris.

Have a look on the jabiru website for the paper on Dipsticks, which shows them all and the levels to which they are to be filled.

Most of us find that if you fill it more than half way up the graduations it will put oil into the catch tank.

This has also been discussed extensively in other posts here, so suggest that you do a search.

"Strange" thought grimacingPete, "that noise sounds like a Rotax but somehow it's different. I wonder why."

"Geee gastricPete sounds terribly crook" thought shewhopaysthefuelbillsmrsPete. "Even worse than usual, because that is why we built him that thunderbox right up there in the back yard, and that is why me and the nippers took out all that surance"

"Oh" she said "It is OK, it is only a Rotax".

"I thought trumpeterPete might have dropped a big-end"

(And shewhotreatshisillsmrsPete was also glad it was just the porcelain that Pete was pounding).

Regards

Le Crapppee

The rotax of my austrian aunt is running a bit rough in the garden

Unable to a respond at this time, gynacologistPete has just gone for his early-morning stroll-------------------------- down the back yard

You have the wrong Pete there, Planey.

That is porcelainpounderPete.

I was referring to doctoroflettersgynoPete, who often lectures on that subject using the Riverland Lass as a model.

Hope this helps.

Le Crappee

The Pete of my aunt is down the back yard.

Planey who takes his Metamusil regularly, thinks this must be a blast from the past

"That's strange" said the medical practisioners who are members of this forum.

"We don't understand why Planey still needs metamusil after taking his daily dose of the NES" said Dr Le Crap.

"What do you think gynacologistPete?"

Regarde

Le Commode

(It's Fun to Fly in a J-one-six-tee {0000})

Geoff

Just one further point. Kev has suggested the Peppercorn at Narromine and I have stayed there too, but if you haven't been to Narromine before and plan to overnight there you will find that the caravan park also has cabins that will have you within an easy walk distance (about 200 m) of the tiedown cables & the aero club.

Regards Geoff

Well Captain :heart: (sigh). I knew it was to good to last. Seems we are back to being mere mortals as far as our newfound title descriptions go.

Ho-hum never mind. :confused:

Like you Pete, I am dismayed that we are both back to merely being Air Commodes.

I guess that is what you get for offering your Mum as a plaything for Le Crappee, and what Le Crap gets for typecasting Slartibuttcheeks and AdminIan as the Indian Chief and the Fireman in the Riverland People.

Once a commode, always a commode I guess.

Regards

Le Crap

My aunt's dunny is in the garden

Geoff

Pete has it right (as usual).

I've now flown it a couple of times. Get over the Great Divide as soon as you reasonably can once you leave Bundy along a couple of those valleys, then head down the western plains or slopes.

Moree, Narromine, Leeton, Narrandera, Tocumwal etc are all good possibilities. I have done Bundy/Gunnedah/Toc in a 160 in one day of 10 hours flying but that is a long tiring day.

Main thing, I reckon, is to get west of the mountainy hard bits ASAP and then really enjoy the flight down the flat bits with the big paddocks.

Hope this helps

Geoff

"So now that slartibuttcheeks is out of the cupboard (refer to his pubic confession in post #491 - not that there is anything wrong with that), we'll have Rossskoe dresssed as a sssleek and oiled up (but prop-less) spotted Pussy (Cheeter), BigmanlyPete in his cowboy uniform with his shiny sssixxx-sshooter, the Plane-driver as a Qantassss pilot (aren't they all?), and Ian dressssed as an Administrator because everyone knows what they are like (not that there is anything wrong with that)"

I now expect complaints from Paley, the Fryer and Hiho for being left out of the line-up.

Will those NES contributors please advise their position and what costumes turn them on.

The Crapster

...... but word has it that the Captain is trying on his black leather jacket ,hat, and false moustache, and has been practicing the arm movements to dancing to YMCA.

Paley and Geoff are not too fussed about it either, so that leaves only the Thrustalot's and our crossdressing-mate to practice his steps.

 

Left clonk, step right, arms above the head in the shape Y. M, C, and an A etc; etc:

This is spooky ............. for how does Planey know all of these secret(e) things, and why on earth would our dearly beloved (not that there is anything wrong with that) Planey take a chance on the Thruster drivers putting a contract out on him.

"Who (clomp) cares about (clomp) Planey (clomp-swish)?" said the Leatherman Crappee.

"I (clomp) have a new song to sing and a new (clomp) group of (swish) characters (thud) to make up the 'Riverland People'"

"The song is 'We love to fly in a J-2-3-0, which is to be sung to th tune of the YMCA and we bend into the form of the J & the 2 and the 3, before we all moon the audience".

"Oh, heavenssss, thatssss no good ssweetiessssss, because with the 4 of usss in this band, that will make it a J230000" (Not that there is anything wrong with that).

"So now that slartibuttcheeks is out of the cupboard (refer to his pubic confession in post #491 - not that there is anything wrong with that), we'll have Rossskoe dresssed as a sssleek and oiled up (but prop-less) spotted Pussy (Cheeter), BigmanlyPete in his cowboy uniform with his shiny sssixxx-sshooter, the Plane-driver as a Qantassss pilot (aren't they all?), and Ian dressssed as an Administrator because everyone knows what they are like (not that there is anything wrong with that)"

Now, darlings, after me:

"It's fun to fly in a J-2-3-0000"

"Join the mile high club in a J-2-3-0000"

"Don't land in strong winds in a C-H-E-E-T-E-R-0000"

Cheersssss

Le Crappeee

The leather pen of my aunt is in a garden in Kings Cross

This is BigPete's Mummy.

PS Don't make me come down there. :devil:

Dear BigPete's Mummy.

Knowing heredity as I do, and if your daughter the Riverland Lass is any indication, what are you doing for dinner tonight?

Le Crappee .... (who might just be about the right age for ya.)

I'd be willing to show you what I can do with my aunt's pen, in the garden.

:devil: :pig:

Welcome back, Planey.

We were starting to get worried that you had either fallen off your perch, were trapped in that malfunctioning security gate, or had fallen off your wallet after doing that cashey.

Regards

Le Crappee

(The multimeter of my aunt is stick in the control box of the security gate)

PS ....... "to pray for a crop-failure." (Good one - oops clomp-swish-thud)

Numptie

I've been studying both of those routes recently and the VTC says that on the coastal route you need the "Willy Clearance Delivery" on 130.35 both ways.

On the inland route I can't see anything in the VTC or ERSA that contradicts what JL has deduced.

But if anyone knows otherwise, let's hear it.

Geoff

as PartyAnimalPete has to partake in the merry making ;) and drinking :thumb_up: at a family gathering.

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin:

 

PS My Aunt's garden is full of pencils.

After considerable merry making, affectionatefamilyloverPete spotted a vision of loveliness across the room.

Could it be, thought closefamilyadorerPete?

Or was it the drink playing tricks on him?

For it was the Riverland Girl.

"You are a vision of scantily clad loveliness" said closefamilypersonPete "And you were fantastic the last time we were together" slurred familyadorerPete. "I felt that we had a real connection".

"I agree said the Riverland beauty, and of course we do have a "connection"".

"For a genealogical investigation (and a quick dna test) has shown that I am your sister"

Whizz-thud went fallingdownincestuousPete, doing an impression of Le Crappee's rubberless peg-leg. ("And I was rubberless too" thought Pete).

Le Crappee

"I'd also better cover up what I did to to my aunt in the garden with my pencil" thought Pete when he woke up.

PS Beat me by 1 minute there, fasttyperPete

"When you refer to the bum of the ship, do you mean the keel?" asked frenchily challenged Le Crappee.

"No" said the secret agent, whose english was equally sheet-haus. "We don't want to keel them, we just want to shake them up a little".

(And so the never Ending Story became the one-man secret story, whose aunt's pen has got lost out in the garden)

:broken_heart::yuk::hittinghead::hittinghead:

For the Crapster has received an email offer from Cirque de Soleil .....................(et what are vous like at planting bumbs in multi-painted ships?).

"I've never been anywhere near a sheep's bumb (be they multi-coloured or just plain)" said Le Crap, "Although I know a few blokes in the NES who may have".

"No, you dopey Skippy el bastardo" said the secret cirque-us man "Would you be willing to put a bumb in a sheep for us (une bateau in ze harbour)?

"You are on the wrong side of the Tasman for that mate .... eh, bro?" said Crappee, who was antagonistic but not animalistic.

"Most people think we are a fancy circus, but we are really the Secret Circle division of the Gov't, going after any GreenPeace gymnasts why are trying to save dumbells and rings-of-fire"

"I know a few blokes in the NES who fit both of those descriptions too" said Geoff.

"There's .................................