Captain

No worries Bigglesworth's mate (not that there is anything wrong with that).

I know where you are.

But with the Xmas/New Year holidays approaching, I regret being unable to get back to you before about the 30th.

You are only about 7 stubbies (or in your case, Alcho-Pops with an umbrella in them) from my holiday home, so you'll be fine.

If you see any Jabiru's, call them up on the air-to-air frequency, ask them to throttle back, and then follow them to safety.

STOP PRESS

Tubby gets sued for not acknowledging the copyright on his Piddling Pup poem. " I should have planned that a bit better" he said to his Coleague, BigLes who urged him to "Publish first, acknowledge copyright later" see www.hisatmosphere.com/tubby's_incarceration69

So Pete converts his J160 to a J400million and heads up to show Geoff, his mate (not that there is anything wrong with that) in Mildura, what fairy (not that there is anything wrong with that) lights, and a paint-job, look like.

He makes expert correction for the drag (not that there is anything wrong with that) of the lights and is tracking straight and true with his balls in the centre (for reduncancyPete has a slip indicator on both sides of the panel), however just before Moulamein his speed decays and he needs to fight for control (which is unusual in such a well balanced aircraft as the Jabiru, when flown by such a well balanced pilot as EquilibriumPete).

"Bugger (not that there is anything wrong with that)" thought Pete. "The lead must be caught around the windsock."

"I'll ..............................

Falling asleep with the boredom he..

..... decided to look a up the Area Forecast page of the BOM website.

"No, bugger it" thought MrBig. "Nobody ever uses them. They are a waste of cyberspace for a young fit bloke like me"

"I was also going to have a look at the NOTAMs too" he added, "But there is no point, as I am NOt going to TAMworth ......... until the Count-Tree Music Festival is on late January"

BigLes also pondered "Why does Tubby write so much about me? Perhaps he has looked at my BumBook site and has taken a bit of a fancy to me."

I'll have to ................................

So BigLes has finally done something useful.

He has proven that it is possible to swipe an ASIC for fuel, with it all charged back to DOTARS.

A cunning plan by the 24/7/11 Butters Gov't to rejuvenate the aviation industry.

"Now watch all those doubting Thomas's go and apply for an ASIC" said 8/3/2.5 Julia.

This initiative made a huge difference to BigPete who no longer needed to go cap in hand to shewhopaysthefuelbills, and Planey was able to order that Masserati with his pension cheque.

The sales on the ClearPropShop went thru the roof, if'n it had one, Ian bought 2 Milleniums, there were more Cheetahs than Jabirus, all Forum members received a dividend cheque of equivalent value when we reached 3000 members in the New Year ............ and life was good.

"We love you, BigLes" was the cry, led by Ian and Le Crapp.

Then Bigles woke up, and guess where his hand was?

It was on his ......................

Slarti's head jerked up and he said...

It looks like it really is connected to my eyelids, like the old joke says.

So when I wink, I .................................

do you have any more rubber bands?"

"I have a CD of the Oakridge Boys, if that will do" said BigLes

Look, we'll give you old guys more time to think up something - OK?

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm ..........................................

:pig: I'll check in on you lot - and you had better have been using you know what. :star:

":raise_eyebrow: :clown: i_dunno" you, EmoticonPete. As it looks like you aren't in charge here any more. The new breed have superceded us both.

There were about 80 posts over 40 minutes last night. That's even better than your efforts with the Riverland Lass.

But Compliments of the Season to you and thanks for the entertainment here during the year.

Le Crappee

"Fight fair yer bastard" said..

Said Ian, who takes his responsibilities on these Forums very seriously.

"You guys should lighten up" was the corus from the cheap seats.

"This all looks a bit like pprune" said the goodyeardangler.

"Don't talk to me about pprunes" said the lion "You should see my cashews after BigLes latched onto them .......... and I have to comment here that I believe that he kept his teeth clenched a bit longer than would be considered appropriate in refined company" he added.

"If I'd have had my hands free, I would have skunt them .... just like them thar rabbits" said Worthy, using an american accent to disguise his RMW shirt and knife.

"Can I have a bite too?" said .........................

Welcome Kev.

You are in good company here, penny-wise.

As they round the first pylon, which happens to be the dunny...

....... the tubbyplaner came out, for he had been eating skinned rabbits which BigLes had sold him in the pub the night before, and he was a bit crook.

"Geez you are on the nose, even up here at 500ft" said Slartibuttplug

"Who ever flies that high over a built up dunny?" said BigLes as FastPete lapped them both for the 2nd time.

Oliver sudden the Riverland Lass came out of the dunny too.

"That's gross, but you are a sly old dog there Tubby" said ShrivelledLes. "I'll take a pic and stick it on my bumbook page with all the other legends I have met. Then we'll ....................

....thought I logged onto pprune...

If you think this is like pprune yyou sshould llook hharder.

Go up to the Nnever Ending Sstory and you will see that we are all great mmmmates here.

Ggeoff

Finally he sees..

...... the mayor of Chuca coming towards him.

"G'day BigLes" he says. "I'm BigPete, and I bet your Mount'n Gauge isn't reading too high out here, unless you are with the Riverland Lass, of course"

"Thank goodness somebody else knows lots of details about the Hitchhiker's Guide" said SlartiButtPlate "It must be prerequiste compulsory reading before you can buy a Cheetah"

"What do you Jabiru jibberers read?" BigLes asked even BiggerPete (as they had them out for comparison).

"We read ...................

It was Biggles ........ he wanted to get permission for a .....

This is getting pretty far fetched now.

That will never happen.

"I'm getting sick of you Jabiru winkers calling my crafted pieces of aluminium sheet a "tin can". And stop referring to me as Slartbuttcrack too, or I'll hit you with my hotplate". He said while he rolled a .........

.......... little left of the runway.

........ gain credits towards passing human factors exam?"

"We can't read your writing" said the RAA office. "Please confirm that 2nd last word is "factors?""

Le Crappee

The text of my Biggles is in the Sierra

Just then Slarti appeared around the corner....

"I'm getting sick of you Jabiru winkers calling my crafted pieces of aluminium sheet a "tin can". And stop referring to me as Slartbuttcrack too, or I'll hit you with my hotplate". He said while he rolled a .....................

On behalf of the previous stalwarts of the NES, particularly Le Crapp, GrandePierre, Planey, Paley, Geoff and HiHo I would like to welcome BigLes, TubboPlaner & Blablabla246. It is good to see some additional contributors with warped senses of humour too.

"I think it's great too" said the Riverland Lass. "I'll scan facebook and see if any of these new contributors are better sorts than Planey and BIGPete, and if so I'll give Planey the boot from the double room @ Narromine, particularly if there is a CCC amongst them."

He decided to try a fast taxi...

"Wear you want go maaaate?" said the taxi driver.

"Talk slow and I put in 2 Geee Peee Esss"

Tee hee, I'll be at avalon if I can find it.

The Avalon Tower received a text message that read "Greetings chaps. This is the famous Biggles W Orth and I am bound for Avalon via the CBD and the intersection point at Tullamarine, then tracking direct not above 2000 ft (unless I feel like going up a bit) ............. and what do you mean I have to get some clearance or other? What is the cross-wind as I am coming straight in when I get there, so don't radio back as I have Garth Brookes cranked up to level 31".

PS Where is Caroline?

"Give the lad a break" said the tower supervisor, "He is just a colourful character with a way of writing that makes unreasonable people bristle. And what trouble can he get into with his uninsured Cheetah over Tulla, anyway. You guys should lighten up a bit".

"Come on in BigGles and we'll park you next to BigPete in the display area"

With Caroline the Riverland Lass giving Planey the slip, he has been left with about 5 Viagra tablets that are looking for a home.

What will he do with them, or who will replace Caroline?

The Crappy has the iced Volvo's ready for Narromine and Avalon, and will also arrange another truckload for the Wide Bay Airshow too in 2009.

But we need some coffee, however don't worry about spoons as Planey will be able to stir them about 5 times ..... and will be able to prop the RAA Marquee up too.

However where is PPPPPPPPPete?

I am considering buying a Jabiru J250 or J230. I just had a demo flight and like the flight characteristics but found the Trim and Rudder controls very stiff. In fact I was unable to move the Trim control during my demo flight. /

 

Welcome ... but what you found above is not normal. Both are light and easily moved in flight. Suggest you try another example of a J230/250 before you make a final decision.

 

Hope this helps.

It's all in the way we word our stories. I can make a circuit story sound like the world nearly came to an end!

But to take your example, if your circuit story included words of derision like "Does anyone really do a pre-flight check on every flight?" or "Does anyone really stop before entering the runway?" you'd expect a bit of a reaction, wouldn't you.

If your "ripping yarn" was disclosed as a work of fiction @ the start, then that might be a different thing, but this site and most of those that populate it are attempting to also promote "recreational aviation" as well as having fun, and I believe that anything that depicts recreational pilots as the cowboy sector of aviation needs a level of supervision or critique.

I'll leave it to the viewers to evaluate whether Mr Worth was just being a colourful author or whether he carries his pallette over into his flying ..... but I reckon that Caroline has him all worked out. She wasn't in Toc, couldn't find the airport in Shepp, her phone might have been out of range and the dog probably ate her homework.

By the way. You've been around. Do you, like BW, only navigate with a map by what you fly directly over the top of? I find that looking out to the side for a few recognisable features to be really useful, even up to 12 nm, or is that just me?

PS@captain Caroline happens to be one of the few people who call me "sensible and responsible"

Few people call me this, but they're the ones who know me the most.

 

It always annoys me, because deep down I know its only too true.

 

Hey, how about I meet you some airport on the weekend, thats if I don't have to work (depends on the timber supplier), or the weather turns bad (depends on God).....

 

might be interesting to have a chat.

No worries mate. If nothing else it is sure to be entertaining in one way or another.

Or better still, come to Narromine next Easter and the rest of the blokes & blokettes can be part of the fun, too.

On a different tack, have you ever considered that your insurance company might hang onto copies of your tales of derring doo, to process as part of your next claim?

I did pass my PPL theory with 88% at 15...... I'm not entirely stupid.

as for listen to the radio and fly......Does everyone out there really get a TAF/ ARFOR before every flight?

And try NOTAMS too. Eg Toc can sometimes be closed while explosives are loaded into a twin out in the middle of the field. Sure it mostly happens early, but not always.

Yes I have flown that area a few times. Did you not notice "The Rock" and Rand and the white stockpiles at the Kaolin mine + the town (and restricted airspace) at Oaklands, and the town of Berrigan, the dam at Yarrawonga, the rail lines with numerous easily identifiable silos, and the Riverina Hwy? Or were you texting Caroline and listening to toof-toof music.

While you take the line that the rest of us should "lighten up", perhaps you should consider "serious-ing up".

Or is this really just a wind-up/joke and you actually do follow half reasonable practices?

I hope you don't get banned as there is a lot to learn here.