Captain

12 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

...across Texas.

Granted it did look a bit strange when bull took gutso's front paws and gutso danced the waltz on his hind legs.

Some people even said.......

..... that this may indicate an improper relationship under section 204 of the Texas penile code, unless of course bull identifies as a female Red Setter, in which case it would be hunky dory and everyone would be rooting for gutso as he.....

41 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......pitot tube. Luckily bull had a big pitot tube. It was painted green and he.......

..... thought that it looked very patriotic with the wattle yellow of the gutso juice In front of the eucalypt green of the pitot tube, so bull, being a super Aussie, naturally broke into song by repeating "girt by sea" 20 times to the tune of waltzing  .......

10 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......the Diversity Act of Tasmania and was accosted by 6 sets of identical twins.

There used to be a law in Australia that it was mandatory to carry a firearm in any aircraft carrying an animal, but it was rescinded after too many pilots shot passengers, so bull was restricted to giving gutso a good cuff under the ear, but the angle didn't make it easy to get his hand out of the way and gutso bit him on the piggy to market finger.

bull ........

 

..... cocked his Piggy-went-to-market thumb and pointed his Piggy-stayed-home finger at gutso (in a .22 behind the ear out behind the barn, type of gesture that all country dogs know, after they have eaten a few chickens or upchucked on their owners).

gutso thought that this was the end and went wee-wee-wee all over his seat in the Jackoff.

To say that bull was disappointed was an understatement, but in usual bull form, he just ......

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

..... he went for the Big Chuck.

 

The rotating aircraft sprayed undigested pieces of steak and a yellow liquid all over bull who ......

..... said, as he wiped the yellow liquid (which looked a bit like hollandaise sause, but from inside a pooch) from around his mouth, off his blood red harness and from inside both cups of his new bose noise cancellors "oh gusto you naughty boy/girl/thing" (bull is very sensitive to canine gender conventions, as he had in the past fallen foul of ......

18 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Wingman showed him how to hold ......

.... his liquor, grow a moustache and wear a cravat, just like the Spitfire pilots in the BOB (not the Ahlox pilot types at the Blue Oyster, but he was referring to the Battle of Britain).

bull threw himself into the lessons with gutso, which is his dog's name, and he .....

24 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.....inability to identify which way to push the stick to correct things like spins, sporran dives and sh!t so he kept on showing it all over the place until he'd fluttered down low enough to land. Suited bull so he'd never bothered to change it and of course ........

..... bull loves being inside the box.

He is known by his aerobatic mates as "box-man", and similarly, as the ladies have declared at the Bone Rissole, bull is their ".....

10 hours ago, turboplanner said:

GT500 and Sportair jump 50' at a time like going up a magic ladder, and it neede some magic because bull would light up a smoke for the climb phase and ...........

..... yell "Smoke On" as he pretended to be a dashing Matt Hall in his Extra, after which bull looped the loop and flew back through his own smoke, which was not easy to see when it just came from a filter-less 70-year-old Craven A.

bull's natural POI has won him several aerobatic competitions, where bull thought that he was a naturally skilled aerobat, however these wins were actually a result of his ......

5 hours ago, turboplanner said:

The Jacka would handle the takeoff quite well, but when it hit the Hinkler layer it would start skipping - a climb of a few feet then an incipient stall.

 

bull would..........

.... counter this naturally using his standard heavy handed bull's own pilot induced oscillation, which used to see his .....

10 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.........language we can’t repeat here. staggering in the air at about 500” (AMSL) from the direction of YSCR. ........

.... and as most aviators or aviatrixes know, that step through and after 500 inches (AMSL) has always been a bit of an issue for the Jackoff, as they move out of ground effect and into the glorious .....

..... strange clunking type of .....

.... promising to henceforth no longer occasionally defy the good Lord's laws of gravity (avref), nor to ....

..... bull, a good man with a disdain for capitals and a slight drinking issue, had mistaken what the tbensi bloke had said and bull thought that he was being invited to join in with consenting adults at the tbensi Friday night piss up, to get hammered.

Imagine his disappointment when he .....

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

..... but they paid big monet .....

NES OBSERVATION - Given what large Monet paintings are worth these days, this is HUGE. 

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

......bitten.

bull called in aviation expert .........

.... , E Paul Ette, who is a brother (or sister, NTTIAWWT) Tasmanian, to sort out .....

11 hours ago, turboplanner said:

bull was not amused ......

.... and when bull gets snakey, the rest of the world gets .....

3 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......these people were a pushover, but bull........

.... is made of sterner stuff and had just completed the 1st human test of the Fathership.

To say that he was ......

20 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The ships were each going to have a Wheeler Scout [avref] operating. The ships looked like Aircraft Carriers once the runways were fitted and immediately .....

..... attracted the attention of the Chinese, because bull had named the Mothership AUKUS and the Fathership UCKTHEM, therefore the Chinese, the Nth Koreans and the Houthi Rebels considered that ...... 

12 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........increase the operations tenfold.....or even twelvefold.

Cappy raises a salient point here. All we ever hear about is Motherships, and this is just another nail in the road to female domination where us males will be rationed .........

 

..... , but no longer will this be the case, as the milking capability of the Fathership will be offered to any interested male of any species. 

In addition, Turbine Business Efficiencies have today issued a 340 page Report which indicates that tenfold or 12-fold may be a doddle, so 20-fold is the new target, and the operations of the Fathership became bigger news than Donny T on the ABC, where Media Watch even claimed that ......

5 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....plastic bags and sell them in the markets in competition with conventional trawlers like bull's. However bull had issued a world-wide press release explaining what Bovear does to the reproductive organs of little children and men. Withing a few weeks bull was needing the trawlers he'd ordered plus another six, and ......

...... he also contracted Turbine Shipbuilding in Korea to build a Titanic sized Mothership to freeze the lady prawns, plus a cryogenics capable Fathership to freeze the boy prawns after they had been milked, so as to ......

11 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....interest was the recent story in the British magazine “The Lancet” which had discovered that the extended veins were a symptom of a type of cancer that was transferable to anyone who ate the prawns. Sales had dropped and bull started to worry about his $6 million order for another three CAT powered trawlers. Could he.....

..... deflect this by having Barry Obama say "bull's prawns are safe and effective" and then by bull feeding his prawns Bovear to stop their methane production?

The methane, pre expulsion, makes them float to the surface so that the Chinese can vacuum them into .....

16 hours ago, turboplanner said:

The case attracted the attention of bull who had extended his fortune by building a chain of restaurants called the raw prawn, and he thought he could increased traffic with a drink called "Prawn Bite", but it was failing because of the constant lines of smelly people asking for bait and .....

...... the fact that bull's prawns have the biggest sh/t chute ever known to man, such that each one needs to be deveined using a chainsaw. 

The reason for the .....

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.... who was three at the time the Vietnam War broke out, but spent the duration of the war in Canada in case he was called up,

Side Comment - It is a sad fact about Wreck Frying, and an even sadder reflection on our white Caucasian privileged skippy background, that we all tend to think that those behind the Forum names are white Skippy blokes that we would like to meet for a beer down the Rissole.

Well Turbo has obviously assumed & fallen for this about Onesie, who alluded to the following in a recent post, and whose real name is Tuấn Minh Trang Phương Nguyễn. This is why he remembers the Mekong leaches so well and is why he looked exactly like the bloke that shot may mate, & forward scout, Jimmy .... before J was Dusted Off.

Tuan came to Aussie on a leaky refugee boat and landed in NW WA, then gravitated initially to Perth to open a French Bread Shop (yeah sure, it really was French), then changed his name initially to Won Tlack, which became onetrack as he achieved "a full blown Michael Jackson" and bleached himself white, then went 100% Skippy, even to the extent of becoming a good old Aussie Rascal (after quitting from being the boss of the Vietnamese gang that controls Freo) and going on to run his great CAT Spares Scam.

I am proud to call OT a mate, but I never take my dog when I go to visit him, as he makes a great Bun Bo Hue.

.... then noticed Turbo's whisky marketing master stroke, as Tubb always includes 2 Mekong leaches in every bottle of his whisky, gin and other assorted hooch.

At the sight of the leaches looking out of the bottle at him, with their vicious little mouth parts seeking his succulent pink flesh, OT convulsed then commenced to bleed from several remnant leech sores that had started to heal in 1989 but had not quite finished, so OT .....

20 hours ago, turboplanner said:

"Looter?" he asked showing some amusement, and OT had to walk nearly half a kilometre before ....

..... he calmed down enough to undertake a search on Google Maps for the nearest Turbine Screen & 3 D Printing Establishment.

OT, ever a man interested in the latest technology, felt that 3D Printing is the future and he was keen to see if Turbine 3D, the most advanced and price competitive in the world, can print using HT Steel and ESCO or Hardox wear surfaces.

The bloke at the Turbine 3D joint considered OT, standing there before him, and said ".....

5 hours ago, turboplanner said:

..... As many people know, you don't DO this to OT and get away with it. The Great Boulder graveyard is testament to the many smart alecs who tried to take him down.

 

His eyes narrowed as he saw the sales manager coming towards him in boiler suit and thongs.

 

He reached for his ..........

.... Kurdaitcha slippers and his proven favorite bone, made from a sliver of either the jawbone of an ass or the arsebone of a jew, Cappy can never remember which, and OT headed for ...