Captain

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

There was a surge of sales from Picton to Bay of Islands until someone hit X with the story that the product was just water ......

..... but that integral with each sale was a written commitment from the purchaser to support Nuclear Energy, and to be 100% in favour of the Green New Deal that was proposed by Charlie Green, which involved building cheek by joule, new 10 storey blocks of waterfront home units & tunnels on all NZ rivers and inlets, then selling them to Palestinian immigrants fresh out of Gaza.

The Gazans loved Fluff, & Charlie, as did the Israeli hostages that each family brought with them, so NZ set the standard for immigrant housing & integration, by issuing ......

..... it was explained that the "fluff" in the BTT Fluff NZ company name was not methane related, but instead referred to the soft and downy sensation that is provided by .....

20 hours ago, turboplanner said:

....... long or short depending on the tide,  and where 87 years ago old Donald ......

..... Te Wiki claimed that his grandfather had been the original Mauri and had been given permission by the gods to kill all of the Moa, to use their feathers to stuff palliasses which would be utilised for any ladies that he found to lay upon.

Donald still had lots of Moa feathers in storage in a warehouse in Gizzbourne and he had approached .....

..... Whakatane, where the airstrip (avref) can be ......

9 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......Fred from IGA.

"Uf you luft the nose wheel sux or suvn unchs the mine wull always hut."

and the posts started again, quite a few saying "Been rubbing noses again?"

Thus started a ...........

..... very unusual practice of Kiwis rubbishing Aussies and the Skippies doing likewise.

This led to the NZ Prime Minister mimicking bowling under-arm every time he (or she) came to Canberra, and the Aussie PM walking everywhere in OZ & NZ with a large toy fluffy sheep named Brenda, sewn onto the front of his dacks.

But the jokes stopped when ......

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

and a few quietly asking how to straighten a nose wheel when it .......

..... has been wheelbarrowed for 700 m down a bumpy grass strip.

The answers to the straightening question sucked in a large number of stewed-ants who were anxious to learn what the technique should be to counter wheelbarrowing, and they did not accept bull's response of "get a tail wheel, ya mugs" too well.

But it was ......

36 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........Kim, to stop whining (anothert term describing the envronmental noise of a Rotax), and get on with it.

Kim introduced ground-breaking anti-whining laws and the population.......

.... therefore undertook a complete reevaluation of Jabiru engines for use below 150 hp, but those favoring water cooling and gearboxes still whined on, and on, and on, like their engines, about the merits of .......

1 hour ago, onetrack said:

.....advised Kim that beating Trump at his own game would take more than a BUGC degree, and he suggested he'd be more than able to assist Kim in acquiring more.........

.... substantive and relevant qualifications that will provide the necessary oompf (a definitive university technical term which is also an avref that describes the power of a 916iS Rotax) to enable .......

.... decided to take the contrary approach and .....

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

........interested I need to sell a brewing company so I can buy an airship [avref] to

dangle ...............

..... a Swan Brewery dongle .....

2 hours ago, bull said:

...biggusdicus a throw back to the monty python days..lol . Now this caused a copyright claim from.............

..... Pontius Pilatus Pilot (avref) via Turbine, Turbine & Turbine Legal Practice LLC, based on a breach of Penal Code XMXMMMXIIIV (MCXXMMC) of the .....

13 hours ago, onetrack said:

..... was to act as a .....

.... recruiter for that master indian criminal, Wankar bullcrapshimselfshit.

bull, as he is known to his mates, specialises in taking kickbacks from both sides, while at the same time being a huge Bollywood (or bollywood as bullchs pronounces it) film & video star, as well as having a leading role in the Indian porn industry, where he uses the stage name of .....

.... free papadoms as incentives for new customers to .....

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

coxic when the person lands after flying through the air.

Sunday was the day when bull ......

..... always worshipped his selected "higher being" ..... and then spent the arvo coating any broken sacrum and/or coccyx with plaster of paris, before bandaging it/them using his special knot that stopped the bandage from slipping off by also wrapping the bandage around the breakee's .......

THE DIAGRAM THAT bULL ALWAYS USES TO EXPLAIN WHAT HE BROKE, TO HIS VICTIMS.

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo is the one left shoulder,

Our beloved Turbo is obviously in denial, or he has forgotten to take his tablets again (It was one of Cappy's jobs while up the Khyber, to keep Turbo's tablets flowing in the correct order. ..... Before Webster packs were invented, they were known throughout the Empire as Cappy Packs and that name was registered until Clarry Webster stole the concept).

In this post he has deflected from the fact that he is the centerpiece in this photo and is doing an impersonation of Jabba the Hutt standing at a lectern.

37 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Explanation: Cappy's eyesight isn't what it used to be; we caught him humping a hollow log recently. Turbo is the one left shoulder, and he had to lead Cappy into position after he was found standing in a daisy pot.

Further Response to Explanation: There is a lot to be said for hollow logs during a drought, ...... and the "daisy pot thing" is quite new & experimental.

Cappy should not be pre-judged just on these.

40 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

bull had been listening intently, because he had been following Klauss's instructions to live your life eating beetles and sending 110% of your income to WEF, and bull ......

..... liked the idea of being a Commissar, carrying a whip and having a red hot poker with which to .....

Explanation - Cappy has always been Turbo's best mate, (not that he has too many others outside of the NES, as Turbo burns a lot of relationship bridges once he has finished using people) so when this photo was taken, Cappy is looking out for Turbo, as usual, and is dressed as the tall good-looking Storm Trooper (note the larger codpiece) behind Turdy's right shoulder.

19 hours ago, turboplanner said:

".........the currants in these buns over here."

All talk in the room ceased, and you could have .............

.... swallowed one of those blowies when many in the room stood and sang the Anthem of the World Economic Forum, including Verse 9 which includes a pledge to eat ze bugs and ze flys.

The new publican was, indeed, running an undercover WEF Pub ................. so bugger all acknowledgement of Aussie Day.

It was at that very moment that Klaus Slob walked into the room as the trumpets played his favourite ditty and a hush came over the joint, until a little boy said "Geez that looks like Turbo, as I saw on a gay website that he had one of those suits made a while ago".

As if that news wasn't enough, when the below photo was forensically examined by the OT Security Company (the premier private forensics laboratory in OZ) it exposed the background that is evident in the 2nd & 3rd photos below, and the ......

.... and quickly moved on to incorporate a new version of Lady Turbinia's Lover and include fresh, vivid and lewd AI generated (so they show all the fine details) drawings in the new edition of the Kama Turbtra, for a 2 books in one deal the contents of which ....

.... , but given bull's expansive "life experiences" (which really just means that bull was a hottie & had taken advantage of lots of ladies), it was a simple matter to .....

.... about the merits of capital letters and the use of french .....

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

so when someone wrote  "Journalists are XXXXX" thinking they were safe, he would write his own story for the paper .........

.... with a thumbs down emoji, although they didn’t exist at the time, so he used his box brownie to take a photo of bull giving a thumbs-down after have a skinfull, a bad keg, and getting a knockback at the Rissole.

bull's thumb therefore became famous Aussie wide once the newspaper became syndicated and bull was .....

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

Cappy was snakey at having to buy ink from Solomon so he.....

..... formed the Cook Squid and Octopus Harvesting Company which was, ostensibly, just active to give them a quick squeeze once caught, harvest the ink, and chuck them back with no harm done, except for the animals wondering "WTF was that?".

The ink was ultimately processed and marketed by the Cook Octopus and Squid Company (the initial COSCO before it became a worldwide phenomenon under Cappy's leadership).

However it was soon realised that most of the cash was in the bits that were being chucked, so at midnight each evening a black painted stealth hydrofoil high speed vessel would arrive and transfer the fleshy bits so that only ink tanks were visible when the Inspectors arrived.

This is when bull and Cappy first met as bull was the sneaky skipper (SS), and this suited him so well, as he hid his black boat in the mangroves around Bone & unloaded it into a fleet of Freightliners during the morning, got paralytic at the Bone Rissole in the arvo, and then came ......

5 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......prompted Turbo to come to her aid by saying he didn't really have all that money, he only had a few billion, and Gina smiled again but no one was to know how devious she was although Cappy had an inkling........

..... because the "Great Ink Scandal" of '85 (or the GIS as it became known in Cappy's legal circles) was still front of mind, and this had caused a .....