The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

....elevator hinges, especially on Jabs which have a habit of..........

.... resisting movement and being heavy on the controls (sortofavref), until a Kelpie is around.

 

In relation to this well-known Jab issue, Kelpies have been seen jumping up on horizontal stabilizers and giving them a nip (Noburef) so as to encourage the elevator hinges to move.

 

"Hurro" interjected Nobu "I is here and I know a rot about this issue" he added "As I spent many weeks working as a shepherd during my 3rd escape from Cowla, so I'm leady to come back into the NES if you want me to add some context, some lather crass Japanese ranuage humour (I know that simple folk like Clappy on the NES find my stuff funny, but selious heavy hitters rike CB plobabry would not), or ......

[Captain]

Not many people would have known how to capture this great photo after he had sorted the stuck hinge issue on the horizontal stabilizer plus on the rudder, and had now moved on to the aileron hinges before checking out the range of movement of the flaps. There was however an unanticipated issue, as he must have chewed off the winglets. Bad dog .... but Nobu thinks that his experlience means that he can letlain the mutt to pre-war imperial standards.

Edited Saturday at 10:45 PM by Captain

[turboplanner]

6 hours ago, Captain said:

Not many people would have known how to capture this great photo after he had sorted the stuck hinge issue on the horizontal stabilizer plus on the rudder, and had now moved on to the aileron hinges before checking out the range of movement of the flaps. There was however an unanticipated issue, as he must have chewed off the winglets. Bad dog .... but Nobu thinks that his experlience means that he can letlain the mutt to pre-war imperial standards.

The old Jabiru portrayed as a Bluebird trick.

[turboplanner]

................Claterpillow Dlivers like OneTrack - he go clack, clack, clack clack round circles cause ho only got one...but he was cust short by a bayonet point up the nostril ...........................

[Captain]

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

................Claterpillow Dlivers like OneTrack - he go clack, clack, clack clack round circles cause ho only got one...but he was cust short by a bayonet point up the nostril ...........................

..... which he resisted, as all WA people are fiercely independent, after all, they are all descended from the crew of the Batavia after being dropped off on the way back to Indonesia.

 

Not many people know, as it is not taught in schools .... and certainly not mentioned during gender transition studies (where the 8 genders in WA are critically reviewed), but the genetic mix of your average Western Australian means that a WA Welcome to Cuntry starts off in Dutch, then Indonesian, South African, then Japanese ("Hurro all youze ex-pearl divers" yelled Nob from the NES peanut gallery), and after 15 other local dialects, it finishes with a Swan Lager, a quick durry, and a ...... 

[turboplanner]

....story about Pearl Luggers. Perhaps Cappy will tell you the story about the day he was diving off Bromme, and ........................

[Captain]

On 31/08/2026 at 9:54 PM, turboplanner said:

....story about Pearl Luggers. Perhaps Cappy will tell you the story about the day he was diving off Bromme, and ........................

.... Pearl approached him underwater, with a proposal that .....

 

The Lugger family are bigger than the Paspalleys, up in the NW.

[Captain]

1 hour ago, Captain said:

.... Pearl approached him underwater, with a proposal that .....

.... involved a pink bikini, a traditional copper and brass diving helmet, Cappy's helmet & 3 blokes from down the pub.

 

This got .....

[turboplanner]

......out of hand and was called, in GA circles. "The Coffee Royal Affair"

A former Prime Minister was involved (so NES Readers please don't tell anyone what you're about to read.) It was in the thru bolt days and Cappy had gone to pieces and wouldn't use the fix Turbo had been selling all over Australia; a piece of 3/4 inch Reo threaded both ends. Cappy was beginning to irritate the lower end of the Pub drinkers, with his pathetic excuses and was threatening never to fly his 230 again. People will remember on page 447 (when this site could afford page numbers) that Cappy's sole reason for building the 230 was to fly from Wagga2 to the Milewa Vineyard, to pick up loads of grog.....something about less duty in Victoria, and when you drink like Caapppy does, that's important; ........ the plausible stories we had to tell to cover up what happened on most flights. Cappy's blubbering had attracted King Smith who used to give Joy Flights at Wangaratta. By this time Turbo, ever helpful, said he had a spare Chev 350 with aluminum crank and straight cut timing gears. It had done five seasons in a Sprintcar, so was dry-sumped to operate upside down. Cappy was not having a bar of it, he said if he put another engine in the Jab it would be a Jaguar. Turbo had choked on his beer and was about to point out there would come a time when the only people driving Jags would be living in India, when King butted in and said "Turbo, if it's one of your Chev 350's, put it in and I'll fly the Jab to London. Cappy wasn't talking to them so they just went over to Cappy's place loaded the Jab pulled the engine out, threw it in the skip and bolted the Chevy in. The first thing they noticed was the sound. Neil Diamond wrote a song about the Chev 350 called "A beautiful noise." Next they noticed how the straight cut gears gave instant power......"Something you need when you're upside down in a Bombay cyclone" said King, big noting himself. The Jabiru was perfect for low level runs over the local airstrip, wing-overs at the end of the strip, and generally impressing the chicks with the noise. "Why don't we take it to London?" said King and Cappy couldn't get the grog on board fast enough. They got as far as a muddy flat in the Kimberleys when the engine quit. It wasn't a thru bolt of course, and it wasn't a Chevy fault or a King fault or a Cappy fault it was crap fuei which had been burning off too fast. Cappy said he'd ring for some fuel, but his phone was flat - he'd been playing SuperMario all the way up. King's was flat too, he'd forgotten to charge it. They stayed alive by eating Kimberley mud snails mixed with coffee grains and brandy, hence the "Coffee Royal mystery". King was supposed to be back at Mascot taking passengers to Melbourne and a dude who was up for the races, Reggie Ansett, stepped in and flew himself and all the passengers home. They cheered him at Tullamarine, so he did it the next day, but that's another story.  Meanwhile Turbo was becoming concerned that they haadn't made Bombay, so he loaded the land cruiser with fuel, the other Chev 350 and various tools and set out alomng the route. He'd been going for 12 days when he....................... 

 

 

Footnote: There's a memorial at the Coffee Royal site; some wanker had carved 1929 over the date, but its been fixed - see photo.