The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

............and some who had alway gone to Vinnies for ther $2 clothes (because the poor people didn't need them if there was so much in the shops, began dressing up. Soon whole suburbs were changing there ways and you didn't see too many people going to funerals in T Shirts, shorts and sandals any more. People even....................

[Captain]

..... started to wear Abe Lincoln top hats with a Samuri or Kamakazi band around it, in order to show that they supported .....

[turboplanner]

..............freedom. Some blue-faced Scot went to a rally on the steps of Parliament House, but ..........

[Captain]

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

..............freedom. Some blue-faced Scot went to a rally on the steps of Parliament House, but ..........

..... nobody could understand him, and it wasn't even Mel Gibson, it was the little bloke from REM (but that didn't stop the press gallery from getting it wrong again), who .....

 

 

Mel Gibbo giving a passionate speech to BR on the steps of Parliament House. He loves her red scots ranga hair.

[turboplanner]

....could blame them; it's not every day you're confronted with a blue face and a big sword.

 

Not many people know that when Mel had his farm out of Albury, Turbo was his equipment advisor. He had the best utes in the district, and at one time asked Turbo to build him an Ultralight. At that stage Recreational Aircraft were just that. There were none of these faux Cessnas around which confused most of the general public. Turbo stayed up on the property for a week, starting with a length of Aluminium Irrigation pipe and hanging together quite a neat frame. Wing Covering came from Dean St Blinds which created aa slight weight issue but this was offset by selecting an aircooled JAP swing saw motor which could cut down big trees, then with its single gear to the wheels, tow the logs to the saw benches. It was a little bit hard to see over the top of the Jap, but Mel said he didn't mind; he'd had to drive weird machines where you sometimes couldn't see and had to rely on the Director. He was driving one of these monsters one day doing everything the Director said, when he said "Two sugars in mine" NES readers would appreciate that in remote driving that would have been hard, and Mel hit the local sewerage truck. He flew the Freedom (named by Turbo), all overs the property and was one of the Movers and Shakers in getting Holbrook up. Then he became famous and for years the Freedom was hanging on the roof of a local latte shop. In later years.......................

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

In later years.....

.... Mel went one better than Freedom flying, when he found religion and made a killing with religious moves out of Hollywood.

 

Turbo was part of this inspiration too as he had spent several years in Moore Theological College after he made a mistake in his application, as in typical Turbo fashion he actually wanted "A-Lot-More College" because, as a youngster he was a ..... 

[Captain]

14 hours ago, Captain said:

as a youngster he was a ..... 

..... greedy little XXXX, due to his ....

[Captain]

17 hours ago, Captain said:

..... greedy little XXXX, due to his ....

.... feeling entitled by bearing the Turbine monica.

 

Cappy on the other hand is proud of his Cook heritage, yet still humble, and has recently been in Tahiti to single handedly rebuild the fort where Jimmy undertook his transit of Venus observations.

 

Following that, Cappy is retracing the Endeavour's tracks from Tonga to Tahiti using the data from James' prototype data logger (made from timber, hence the use of the new term at that time of "logger") and his related automatic sextant machine (which was a ASM and is like a GPS, but a bit harder to use, particularly at night).

 

So presently Crappy is 614.9 NM from Tahiti and 726.2 NM from a landing in Tonga.

 

Will all NESers please pray that the spears will be kept in locked & approved storage after the last spear amnesty, and that ......

[turboplanner]

.........Cappy will not repeat the same mistake as his ancestor and start touching up the local hula dancers.

Cappy was one step ahead of that episode, he never went more that three steps from the encabulator powered Drifter he'd resurrected from .....

[Captain]

7 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.........Cappy will not repeat the same mistake as his ancestor and start touching up the local hula dancers.

Cappy was one step ahead of that episode, he never went more that three steps from the encabulator powered Drifter he'd resurrected from .....

... a chook shed find, which are much harder to deal with than barn finds, because ....

[turboplanner]

.......the chooks tend to peck at the wiring and fill the Drifter with feathers, and their chook live for some reason like the seat cushions so on anything more than a 15 minute flight the occupants are scratching...........

[Captain]

3 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......the chooks tend to peck at the wiring and fill the Drifter with feathers, and their chook live for some reason like the seat cushions so on anything more than a 15 minute flight the occupants are scratching...........

..... lice out of their hair.

 

"Why you got lice in your hair, as you should have put that with your Gung Pow chicken" commented Nobu, who was still entertaining the Ambassador and a heap of Cowla grandmas in Cowla's Ambassador Motel, which is soon to be converted into the Japanese Embassy.

 

"Not lice" mate explained Cappy "He means lice ... little insects that look like Turbo as a kid."

 

"I'm confused" leplied Nobu "But to get it sorted, me and the Ambassador and our PM with the melons will have a few capps of chino with Mable from the 8-mile farm (she hid Japanese prisoners of war, so is the Cowla equivalent of Ann Frank and that other chick from the French resistance, combined) and see if she will .....

[turboplanner]

......Organise a party Saturday night. These parties had a bad habit of lasting until the early hours of Monday morning, but more about that later.

 

Cappy has raised an interesting detail in "Mabel from the 8-mile farm."

This piece of war history is still under the Official Secrets Act, and nothing has ever been released.

NES Readers are recommended not to loosen their lips about this piece of history because Australia has precious few Warships left, and the Rougue SAS ex soldiers are hired to shut people up.

 

However Turbo is prepared to take the risk, out of pride in Mabel Buttock, Australia's version of Schindler and his list.

 

Mabel didn't have a very happy schooling being the butt of many jokes and catcalls of "They're SMALL", but this made her tough. She spent most of her day in the library until School Bus time for the run out to the 8 - mile Farm.

Her parents were in the cropping and sheep business.

Turbo had the pleasure of flying over the 8 - mile farm a week or so ago and it's as pristine as it was in WW2. Dingo Gully, which sheltered the little columns of Jap prisoners as they were escorted to freedom has not been degraded by the erosion,  which is a credit to Mabel's son Saito Buttock and Grandson Minato Buttock.

When WW2 was at its height, Mabel had ridden a horse into town to watch the film Schindler's list.

It was said she was very thoughtful after that, and without telling anyone, got an old binder out of the shed and cut 20 acres for straw.

Her father Gordon McTavish Buttock was bemused at this but she said she wanted the hay for the horses, and that's what Gordon told the neighbours.

People who have travelled to Japan will remember going to night clubs and seeing the sextet dancers.

There were only two dancers but the cleverly arranged structure each was tied to contained two extra Straw Men.   [For NES readers this is where the "Straw Man" argument comes from.]

Mabel started smuggling straw men into the camp two by two, with the Straw Men dressed as cleaners the same as Mabel.

No one looks at Cleaners, and the Australian Guards ignored them, (They were from Queensland and Tasmania).

Six hours later three cleaners strolling out through the gates didn't ring any bells, and at the 8 - Mile, Mabel started Australianising them with the Queensland clothing of the day, Brylcreem, and spray tan in a dark shade, so they looked like Queensland Cane Knackers.

They then had to ride up the gorge, over the secret trails of the Great Divide and down into Wollongong, where everyone else looked the same anyway.

From there it was a ship to Malaya where they stayed at a Turbine Resort for the rest of the war.

In fact they stayed on three years after the war until Grantley Turbine booted them out.

In this way Mabel Buttock saved three thousand lives, and after the years of Tech School in Malaya many came back to Ford and were the backbone in producing the Ford Falcon.

Not many people know that Mabel Spent her last years in the Royal Suite of Melbourne's Windsor Hotel, paid for by Cappy's father who .....................

[Captain]

29 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

 

Not many people know that Mabel Spent her last years in the Royal Suite of Melbourne's Windsor Hotel, paid for by Cappy's father who ......

.... had lain with Mabel on numerous occasions, and found her adequate, but then who wouldn't, when the alternative was to .....

 

Crappy is exhausted after that big read of Tubb's last post 

Edited 2 hours ago by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......be exposed with Cooks Tours blasted in the media for shipping out thousands of escaped prisoners, or even .....................

 

Turbo was trying to turn the page but suspects that EEn uses elastic pages.