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turboplanner

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Everything posted by turboplanner

  1. ......perform like no other, and particularly better than the Hawaiians who'd never seen a surf board in that era and thought it was some sort of pet animal. CCVII, showing financial skills that were handed down through the generations to the present Cappy, suggested a Surfing Festival, Winner Takes All. Every male on the Island nominated and they all raced into the hinterland to cut surfboards from the standa of giant hickory trees. Two weeks later they were all lined up. A wombat gut airship was tethered on the beach so judges could carefully observe all the moves like breaks and stuff, and they were ready..................
  2. "....Members of the KFW$BC shall follow the Rules in the Rule Book at all times." CCVII, a bit of a stickler for rules was getting excited and asked to see the book. In his own era no one could beat him in defining a paragraph, or pointing out the importamce of a particular comma. "We don't have one" laughed (AK), and CCVII stood there in awe of the exquisite skill of these odd people, cannibals, who would have a great laugh when the equivelent of a CASA FoI tried one on. Even better (in the eyes of some serial law breakers, when they'd finished laughing the tribe would chop him up and eat him for lunch. An older warrior hopped up and invited CCVII for a spin, One Leg had been out fishing when a storm came up and blew him way out into mid ocean. Sick of eating the fish he caught during the next month, he'd chopped off his leg because he knew humans tasted much better that fish. They spent the afternoon drifting around over the Hawaiian Islands looking for ....... The people of Redbanks in the Burra District of South Australia regularly reported cars being hit by wombats - three injured in SM but always there was someone who immediately corrected their English to "wombat hit by car", so that even today no one is following up on controlling these dangerous animals from South Australia.
  3. ..Captain Cook VII awoke in a strange place. There were Aerial vehicles floating through the air enjoying the popular sport of banana peeling the beachgoers, CCVII quickly became one of the targets in his out of place clothing. He was standing on the sand of Kealakehua Bay in the exact spot his ancestor had been speared. Back home, he'd been trying to invent a batteryless alarm clock using AI, and AI did what it does and turned it into a time machine uncommanded. CCVII had a Drifter so he was most interested in the aerial vehicles and after returning the banana peel up its owner's nose, asked him for details. Putting his finger to his nose and blowing out the banana peel, an affable Kamehamea explained the balloons were made from Diprodon guts, and they filled them up with the green gas seeping out of the secret places, but wouldn't say any more. CCVII was itching to fly so........................................................................................
  4. Turbo has been moved to tears thinking of the generosity and self sacrifice of Ned's brother Seamus Kelly, who never got the recognition for the many raids he carried out in northeast Victoria and the Riverina while his lazy bro Ned was entertaining journalists at the local pub. Also at the sensitive way his friend Cappy had depicted Seamus. He respectfully asks for a dot or two.
  5. No, we're using Google every day these days and that contributes to the reach of the site.
  6. and measured, before becoming a folk hero for centuries. It wasn't until Turbo was in Jerilderee one day looking for a hard to get Facel Lite MkII powered by a Bluehead that he stopped off at the Kelly Museum and read the Jerideree Letter, He then realised the real truth of the Ned Kelly Legend, which little Jimmy Chalmers copied this week. Ned should have started with a Cat Farm, but history got in the way, and horses couldn't......... True Story: Turbo had been at the Brisbane Truck Show which started on a Thursday with serious Industry entrepreneurs coming through looking for deals on 600 trucks for their project and finishing on a Saturday night where most of the action was keeping four year olds from falling out of Kenworth Cabs. About 9 pm on the Saturday night when Turbo's legs ached from days of standing on concrete, a man with a beard walked up, smartly dressed and introduced himself as Rob Kelly. Smartass as he was, Turbo couldn't stop himself saying "Are you one of the NED Kellys?" The man stepped back his eyes opened wide and he said "Yes", how did you know?" Turbo admitted to being a smartass and Rob said "did you know the story?" and spent the next hour explaining how at the seige of Glenrowan, they managed to get Ned away, and one of his brothers stepped into the armour and the rest is history. Ned rode up through NSW and finished up settling at Ipswich where he married and lived out his life and is buried in the Ipswich Cemetery, under a different name of course. They finished their business pricing up a truck for the dealer and Rob went on his way. "Truck Shows" Turbo thought, and forgot about this unlikely story. Some years later Turbo was reading the Saturday Newspaper, and there was the story; a team of investigators had traced Ned at various locations heading north and were researching the graves in the Ipswich cmetery.
  7. .....Ned Kelly had been hanged. Not many people know it was at Corowa. They had to put the body in a box marked SichuanRight Good Tea and rail him to Melbourne's Old Gaol (which was youngf then of course) to be hung again, before ....... It's been noted that Cappy used gliding terms in his last post. He was never a raghead, but one of the best gliding afficionados in the Country. Up on the Khyber Pass, he and Turbo built a glider from packing cases, Bully Beef tins and string. He would launch between the bursts of enemy fire. There was no problem with friendly fire because it was up in the glider. He would do a quick reconnoitre, take a few shots of the lines with his Brownie, always managing to get those lifts which allowed him to land higher up. Turbo infiltrated the lines lower down and told the Khybers stories of a ghost ship from God piloted by a Debil Debil, and that helped to hold the lines down.
  8. .....shipping container you were for the long drop (located 35 km north of Walla Walla, once suggested as the Capital of New South Wales. Turbo has been overwhelmed by trhe detailed knowledge of Cappy and OT about the Mexicans. Turbo only got as far as the Tijuana Jail before .......................
  9. Choapas and Choapas. It wasn't long before there was a Choapas installed as Mayor of Las Choapas Choapas, The Shire President retained his job as Harry Coapas after changing his name from Dixon by deed poll, a "Welcome to Las Choapas Choapas smoking ceremony was sent down by the great Rainbow Bird to the six tribesmen on the Choapas River, the airport was renamed Las Choapas International Airport and Space Port [avref]. The coffee shops were selling Tequila and Fajitas, the renowned Wagga Wagga lawns had all been grubbed out to show the real Riverina dirt, and the BNS balls now had rules.............
  10. ......rabbing some time between fires on the beach at Surfers, and had been talked into selling the BOB to an retired Member who used to post on this site. The Member (we can't tell you his ID, but he was from NSW, had made a fortune selling Thruster parts or what the customers throught were Thruster parts. In those good old days every fine day saw thousands of Thrusters flying through the air, not all using Bernouli's Principal. An avid reader of the NES, he loved the lurid stories reported in NSE, and was looking forward to turning Wagga Wagga, a backward town these days into a smaller version of Las ..........................
  11. ......the purchase of the WAGGA WAGGA Blue Oyster Bar. Long time NES viewers will remember (but not tell of) the BOB which was Loxy's creation and baby and grew to be a multi-million dollar relaxation centre for the Riverina when there wasn't a BNS on. Loxy's cover had been the local Fairies/Fiaries/Fries Fire Truck guru as a cover but now was reluctantly selling it. Of course anyone reading the News knows that all the Tobacco joints have been burnt down now, and the protection racketeers have started on nightclubs, but you wouldn't know this from that persuasive spiel of Loxy's and the price .......................
  12. ....attending rag shows with the "Do we know you?" latte class where the wives spend $1000.00 on clothes at the Peppermint Grove coffee/clobber shop every morning whether they need them of not. As much as Turbo is so proud of OT's achievements, he notes the bandy legs, not from riding horses on the Stations like Turbo did, but from sagging under the weight of lifting off CAT D3 tracks off the bull gear (not a mention of our Bull but a sprockety thing). Turbo also notes the AI two day growth; don't we all use that today eh. It was at one of thise rag shows, where both Turbo and OT had become bored by the stream of extreem female humanity walking past, that TurbOT was born and the rest is h..............................
  13. We don't need th have extreme left politics rammed into us at every opportunity.
  14. ........for the biggest CAT parts outlet in the Southern Hemisphere. OT had stocks of 48 different types of grousers, these days referred to by the "in" people as "Undercarriage" parts, despite no record of any Cat machine taking off or circling an airfield, although there are plenty of records showing 40 tonne Cat D8s running stright down steep hills in angel gear to get away from bushfires, the only way of slowing down being to knock over trees on the way down. CAT men are tough men and ...............................
  15. .....gear (avref) and taking off (avref) for the high (avref) life. The fact that all the people in Perth live on one street does make it hard to get new ideas, but OT just slugs it out on Peppermint Grobe like the rest of .........
  16. ..........her fleece-lined boots, and RMW jeans which made him look like ....................
  17. ......extensive plastic surgery, done on the cheap in Somalia, which is why, at first, people gasp at the apparition of a chessboard with lips. You get used to it in WA; in the eraly days the PS was done in Bali, on the beach; they weren't going there for the surfing or ........
  18. .....popularity of Rangas on the wane (possibly due to the Ranga fire bombing of pet stores in Adelaide) it's easier just to use peroxide and distance yourself from the more extreme politics of the ............................ Always watch Cappy carefully. Astute NES readers will see he has moved out to Micronesia. (This apparently the result of Cappy no realising Turbo was joking when he said Micronesian women were the best hula dancers in the Pacific.) This post of course shows Turbo can hold on or let go at any hour of the day with ease.
  19. .....bigotry, tapestry, carpentry types who flooded Social Media with tears at the slightest change to their status. The Party had been gaining strength in recent years, competing with Pauline Hanson's One Nation Party for votes and ...........
  20. .......wing of the Labotr Party which was terrorised by......................
  21. ............"You wanna be on the Hormuz Strait Team next week?" with just one eyebrow rising. Sam had been reading Don's book "How I tell Congress what to do" and she was irritated with that little sandrabbit Liteneasy, so she ...........
  22. Turbo politely disagrees with the amateur assessment offered above. A short view of TurbineAussieInventions Inc's website shows the installation of the now ubiquitous use of TurbineDrizabone platinum engine shrouds on all 2026 machines, achieving a power increase of 26.3%, and the TurbineAkubra rocker covers made from a secret metal, which increases power by 7.365%.
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