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Posted
52 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......free copy of my next Youtube Influencing Sequence and also.........

... a picture of my grandma, who is about the same age, as .....

Posted
46 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......Turbinia Pokahontas..........

...., yet TP still looks "hot" IMHO, and that must be due to the Turbine family's genes, which are obviously....

Posted

..........not made in China, but blued, sewn and jeaned by the Navajo in Flagstaff Arizona.

 

In fact, Turbo always buys his jeans in ChuckxJeanswereus because.....

Posted

Dear NES crew,

 

I am reliably informed by one of his concubines that Turbo experienced the earth shake for him at 2 am yesterday. 

 

However it was just a 4.7 quake at his Korumburra Equine, Wagu & Hunting Estate (with 4000 m paved strip)

Posted
1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

In fact, Turbo always buys his jeans in ChuckxJeanswereus because.....

.... they have see thru mirrors in the changerooms, and they invite people of Turbo's significance to sit in the secret lounge chairs, with coffee & cake, to enjoy the show, and then take advantage of the .....

Posted

.......guest. Since Turbo always attended there under the name Tom Cruise, and looked like Tom, he presumes Tom's people took care of those big tips.

21 hours ago, Captain said:

Dear NES crew,

 

I am reliably informed by one of his concubines that Turbo experienced the earth shake for him at 2 am yesterday. 

 

However it was just a 4.7 quake at his Korumburra Equine, Wagu & Hunting Estate (with 4000 m paved strip)

Turbo had made sure there was no mention of fees at the KEWHE airport, so all the excitement stayed 17 km away from him. The wombats where hopping a bit - they'd taken it in the guts.

Posted
2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......guest. Since Turbo always attended there under the name Tom Cruise, and looked like Tom, he presumes Tom's people took care of those big tips.

Turbo is 100% Tom C, and this is one of his advantages, as he only needs a shallow trench when up the Khyber, and he can fit into his 'Vette without banging his head. Tubb/Tom also did all of the flying scenes live in Top Gun.

Cappy now awaits more dots from Turdy, so that the NES can continue, and our hundreds of readers, (and Bernie), can enjoy the Tome as we plough on towards 2000 pages.

Posted
3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

big tips

The opportunity to see big tips is the main attraction of the see thru mirrors. 

Posted

..........(Turbo apologises for the lack of dots; he had drifted into nostalgia thinking of Elizabeth. No one knew her surname. She worked in the Chemist Shop in Turbo's little suburb. You had to go to the local Doctor for an itch to see her; buying a packet of jelly beans was too obvious. You made sure at least two people had gone in and you slowly walked in waiting for a movement as she spun around; it was like watching the Blue Angels falling out of a starburst. More than one person lost the ability to talk when she said "How can I help you?" She had long blonde hair...........(no, not finished with the dots yet). Occasionally she'd be running errands at lunch time, and the cars in the street would stop. One day Turbo was in the Hardware shop buying some screws, and the assistant next to the one serving had yelled "Jesus!, look at that!" The wide eyes of the assistant confirmed that Elizabeth had just walked in, blond hair streaming out behind. She flew a Cessna 150. Turbo took her out once............................................

 

Posted
9 hours ago, turboplanner said:

..........(Turbo apologises for the lack of dots; he had drifted into nostalgia thinking of Elizabeth. No one knew her surname. She worked in the Chemist Shop in Turbo's little suburb. You had to go to the local Doctor for an itch to see her; buying a packet of jelly beans was too obvious. You made sure at least two people had gone in and you slowly walked in waiting for a movement as she spun around; it was like watching the Blue Angels falling out of a starburst. More than one person lost the ability to talk when she said "How can I help you?" She had long blonde hair...........(no, not finished with the dots yet). Occasionally she'd be running errands at lunch time, and the cars in the street would stop. One day Turbo was in the Hardware shop buying some screws, and the assistant next to the one serving had yelled "Jesus!, look at that!" The wide eyes of the assistant confirmed that Elizabeth had just walked in, blond hair streaming out behind. She flew a Cessna 150. Turbo took her out once............................................

 

..... before she became Queen, and thereafter Turbo was always up to .....

Posted
7 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........one fund raiser or another for the teeth...............

 

.... ing rings for her royal offspring, one of whom is the spit of Turbo, and has become well known recently because of.....

Posted
7 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.........his "influencer" status in Southern California, where he is cutting ......

.... a rug with Liz Hurley and believes that he can now join the Aussie cricket team, as he has been where Warny has been and thinks that it can't be too hard to also chuck a ball with a bit of spin on it.

 

So, his baggy Green is on the ......

Posted

.......way from Zingzou, China, and he plans to just catch the bus and hope no one notices.......

Posted
1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

.......way from Zingzou, China, and he plans to just catch the bus and hope no one notices.......

.... on the way to the MCG to play The Pomms the next time they tour.

 

His plan is to just chuck the same ball that ruined Mike Gatting's career, after all, how hard can this caper be, then bask in the glory and the adoring ladies + get a promotional gig with Advanced Hair Studio and also a ......

Posted

.......12 months unlimited coupons for petrol at $1.00 a litre from Adrian Portelli. All he has do do it pay the Membership fee. He expects to save ...... 

Posted (edited)

.... enough to buy a tank of fuel and a ....

Edited by Captain
Posted

.....cupcake in the roadhouse.

He's happy with that, because money is money, as Turbo has always said....................

Posted
32 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.....cupcake in the roadhouse.

He's happy with that, because money is money, as Turbo has always said....................

.... and that's easy for Turbo, as opposed to the rest of us on Wreck Frying, who are judt mere mortals and who therefore, each day have to strive & .....

Posted (edited)

......still didn't have a dime to play the jukebox, Cappy started slipping down that path to depression where people look back on themselves as mere mortals, and remember their mother saying to visitors  "he's good with his hands", and remembered  Motz, who grew a beard to cover up his  embarrassment as he trained some of the best Recreational Flyers in history, flitting in and out of CTA legally, skilfull enough to know how. Skilfull enough to be a "Flying" at the Royal Flying Doctor service where he had to land anywhere and did, thanks to his RA skills. Then his move to VIP Charter where he only flew the best. He would have flown Elvis but for a hamburger. Then staring through the glass of his toy telescope, so powerful that he could see galaxies far far away looking for his ancestors the Jedi. And Loxy, that genius who when Turbo was called to Wagga Wagga on a CIA matter, entertained him at Cappy's place (Cappy was away appearing in Court for something he'd done somewhere.), Now providing magnificent community support as a Genereal in the Fair/Fiar Service and Deputy Mayor of Wagga Wagga City. His ancestors were Jedi Knights from the Eagle Galaxy, which Motz showed to Turbo one night. Who can forget (Turbo will have his name in a moment). Ah that's right, Isaac, that ball of fire who digitised the full stop with FFS!. He flies an Auster, some do. His ancestry produced the Jedi Knights of the Hot Galaxy, very few people know about that one, but Motz has seen beings with the powerful ditital telescope. Tomo, who bought a Commanche because its registration was sexy, originates from the Queensland galaxy (Jedi Warriors, but odd), but Cappy, despite the exotic adventures of his ancestor Captain James, was only from the judt mere mortal galax. In this galaxy, it was said, you could spit on the floor and curse, and ........................

Edited by turboplanner
  • Haha 1
Posted

.... be an undercover Jedi Knight, although the light sabre was a bit of a give-away whilst under cover, so he developed a procedure to insert it wrapped in a condom, like the drug mules do, but an accidental triggering of a light sabre when in that position could cauterize a ....

Posted

........bull and if it didn't cauterize it could still give him a bad case of the irrits, and it was best not to try to hand him a bunch of carrots.

If you've ever seen a lit up bull you know how hard and fast they run. On the Queensland Rodeo and campdrafting (Turbo used to go to all of them for the chicks) Meetings back in about 2017 they lit up a bull and it went straight through the CWA tent and ................

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