planedriver

Hi Guys.

An old avaition junky here, who's never found a cure for his addiction, and not looking for one anyway.

Just landed at this site.

Done a bit of flying on Auster, Warriers and Jabirus and like to stay in touch with the aviation scene.

Not done very much in recent years and stiiiiill waiting for a call from the trusty moderator to go for a spin. (Don't worry Darren, lifes always changing, so i'll try not to get in too much of a flap about it) :character0029:

Kind regards

planey

Some months after my wife and I seperated, I took another lady out to dinner for the first time, and later, we went on to see a really good show.

The evening was a huge success and as I dropped her at her door I said, "Thank you so much, I have had a lovely time and really appreciated your company tonight.

You looked so stunning over dinner, and you remind me of a beautiful rambling rose. May I call on you tomorrow?"

She agreed and a date was made.

The next night I knocked on her door with a nice but small bunch of flowers for her, and when the door was opened, she slapped me hard across the face:black_eye:.

I can tell you I was stunned in more ways the one.

"What was that for I asked with tears in my eyes?"

She said, "I looked up rambling rose in the encyclopedia last night and it said,

'Not well suited to bedding, but is excellent for rooting up against a garden wall'."

Prince Charles was backing his Land Rover out of the garage at Buckingham Palace when he ran over the Queen's favorite Welsh corgi. He got out and found the corgi dead, squashed to a pulp.

The Prince was devastated. What a sad thing to happen!

One of his aides offered to help, but the Prince brushed everyone away. "I'll will bury the dog myself," he said. "Just bring me a spade."

With that, Prince Charles gathered up the limp, squashed body of the poor little dog and carried it to the garden. There he began to dig a hole. As he cried:crying: over the loss of this friendly animal, he systematically shoveled the dirt out of the hole :construction:and dropped it in a pile.

Then to his surprise, the spade hit something metallic and gave a clang. Prince Charles reached down and pulled out the object. It looked like a lamp.

Charles dusted it off to get a better look when suddenly a Genie materialized in a cloud of vapor. The Genie looked Charles in the eye and said "Your highness, I can give you one wish! What would you like?"

The Prince pointed to the lifeless animal and said "This is mummy's favorite dog. Can you bring it back to life?"

The Genie said "Let's have a look at the dog. Oh no, nothing can be done with this dog, you ran over it with the Land Rover. There is too much damage to the dog ... even with all my powers, nothing can be done."

"But you must try!" says the Prince, "It's mummy's favorite!"

"I'm sorry" said the Genie shaking his head, "there's no way I can bring it back to life."thumb_down

"OK" said the prince with a shrug of his shoulders, putting both hands back in his pockets like he usually does. "But do I still have a wish?"

"Yes, of course", said the Genie. :thumb_up:

"Well", said the Prince, "I just married Camilla.... could you make her as beautiful as Diana was?"

The Genie thought for a while then said, "Let's have another look at the dog!"

Why not grow a handlebar moustache .............................??

Reported on the noon news today that an Ultralight pilot missing on a trip from Renmark SA to Hay in NSW has been found deceased near Hay this morning. No futher details as yet.

I know that my condolences along with everyone else's on the forums, go out to the family and friends at this very sad loss.

R.I.P.

The Top 17 Country-Western Songs for 2009

17. I Hate Every Bone in her Body but Mine.

16. It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed Your Ass Out All Day Long.

15. If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You.

14. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me.

13. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?

12. I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well.

11. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better

10. I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win.

9. I'll Marry You Tomorrow, But Let's Honeymoon Tonight

8. I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like You're Still Here.

7. If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I'd Be Out Of Prison By Now

6. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him.

5. She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger.

4. You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly.

3. Her Teeth Were Stained But Her Heart Was Pure.

2. She's Looking Better After Every Beer.

And the Number #1 country song is.

1. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With Ugly Women but I've Sure Woke Up With A Few

A husband and wife are having major problems after 15 years of marriage, so they go to seek the advice of amarriage counselor.

The counselor asks them what the problem is. The wife launches into a tirade, whinging about every problem they have ever had in the 15 years they've been married. She goes on and on and on and on.

Finally, the counselor gets up, walks around the desk, embraces the wife and kisses her very passionately. The woman shuts up and stares at him quietly in a daze.

The counselor then turns to the husband and says, "Your wife is very lonely. This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"

The husband thinks for a moment and replies, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but Tuesdays,Thursdays, and Fridays im in the shed from dawn til midnight building my aeroplane, and Sundays I go flying with the boys.

Tell me, do you work Saturdays by any chance?"

A man was pulled over, breath tested and subsequently arrested for drink driving.

The female officer tells the man, "Sir, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can, and will be held against you."

"Great idea," the drunk replies. "Tits!"

Gday Guys,,,, Its been a hard slog since Avalon but,,,,Woo Hoo My Renegade flies again !!! With 4 rebuilt and covered wings, New main undercarriage legs and some repairs to the Fues and engine cowl. Gee Its good to be back in the air. Done some test flights last week and some today then done some Circuits with my wife Annette, She had gone solo it it just before Avalon and hasnt flown since. She was a little shaky but she still done some nice landings. A few more circuits and she will be on the ball again. Pete

My heart went out to you and the others involved when I saw the pictures.

Kind regards

Planey

I bought a new Nissan Navara and returned to the dealer earlier in the week because I couldn't get the radio to work.

The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated.

'Nelson,' the salesman said to the radio.

The radio replied, 'Ricky or Willie?'

'Willie!' he continued and 'On The Road Again' came from the speakers.

Then he said, 'Ray Charles!', and in an instant ' Georgia On My Mind' replaced Willie Nelson.

I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, 'Beethoven,' I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, 'Beatles,' I'd get one of their great songs.

Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed me, but I swerved just in time to avoid him. I yelled, ' Stupid A*s*hole!'

Immediately the radio retuned to the ABC and all I got was a parliamentary speech by Kevin Rudd thumb_down

:thumb_up:Just thought I would say gudday.New member call sign-RAYMAR.

:welcome:to Australia if you're a recent arrival, and more importantly, welcome to the best recreational site on the internet. We look forward to hearing more from you in the future.

Rgds

Planey

Yes Ian, I have to agree with Ray - it's a 10.Why?

I didn't have the seatbelt done up on the office chair!

 

Decca.

That would have to be the one for sure. Was able to read a page from the book on an internet site, but that was all I got.

Can't wait to get my hands on a copy, as I did'nt even know the book existed.

Many thanks.

Alan

Hey Guys, re-read my mail. I received this from my mate Taff. His Gloom, not mine. He and I were first introduced to Lancs during our air-borne radar training at RAF Yatesbury in Wiltshire, UK. If I remember correctly, they had a Lanc' in the training hanger and I remember skinning my shin on the climb up to the cockpit. For those who haven't been in one, the wing main spar goes right through the fuselage and has to be climbed over.

I was lucky enough to have a short ride in one God knows how many years ago at Biggin Hill. I can only guess that it must have been around 40-45yrs ago and it had been flown to the UK from either Australia or NZ, and arrived flying on 2 or 3 remaining good engines.

My Dad was involved in supplying camoflage paint for its restoration, it was then granted a special certificate of airworthiness to fly on to near Derby, where RR were going to overhaul the Merlins.

When I climbed up into the thing, I felt a bit claustrophobic as I first made my way to the rear gunners turret almost crawling throught a small tunnel for a look around, because all the other space was taken up for it's bomb load.

I only had a flight of about 5 or 10 minutes prior to to departing to Derby, but can remember the engines almost deafening me. I had a couple of photos laying around somewhere, taken with the old bakelite cased Kodak brownie 127 camera which I have'nt seen in ages.

If I come across them, i'll scan them and post them on the forums just out of general interest.

Presumeably the Lanc is still around, and it was being taken care of by the Historical Aircraft Society, I think it was called.

Memories!

Regards

Alan

Thanks fellas. I'm a regular visitor to the RAA site and have been reading the flight theory section so I can learn to understand the lingo vne,mtow etc, and learn some of those not so common sense things. I think I'll put a trial instructional flight on the birthday list!Thanks again.

Flying R/C is a good thing, and gives an understanding about flight.

Don't be shy,tell the family what you want for your Birthday and keep your money in your pocket. Once you've had a trial instruction flight you still have money towards your next flight.

BE WARNED! Its addictive, like the smile you'll have on your face, and you'll lay in bed at night reliving your first flight many times:clap:.

Kind regards

planey

Sorry David, I forgot to say welcome, the pommy humour kicked in too fast, it always gets me in strife.

At 66, antibiotics can't cure my love of flying, and don't I want it to.

Sounds to me like you've got it made mate, your own planes and a lovely wife to clean the bugs off the windsreen, what more could a man wish for?

G'day David.I will have to see if I can find your strip on Google Earth. I get down into that country fairly often when I bushwalk at Isla Gorge, but can't place Frog Hollow.

Hope you find this info really helpful:question:

Rgds

Alan

"Well", said Tourism Tomo, "What a hide some of you blokes have, knocking us ere in The Perfect State. :hittinghead:

 

"I want youse all to know, that we go ahead in leaps and bounds up here and are very proud of it, and thats not only at the local airstrip.

 

If you lot can ave a bit of a stir, then so can I.:stirring pot:

 

Today, i've written to the RAA voiceing my safety concerns about some of you bloody Mexicans:kumbaya: who fly Sportstars and the like, wearing big straw hats to keep the sun off.

 

Up here, we wear banana leaves which bend a lot easier and have a better fire-rating, so it not only keeps the sun off, but is easier to wear our headsets plugged into our ipods. :DJ:The "boof boof" music resonates with the engine revs and if it sounds out of sync, we know we should get down quick.

 

We might have quite a few migrants who have settled here from India, but it's unfair to say that it's largely tiger country.

 

In conclusion, we also like to be thorough in our communication and training skills, so would appreciate you typing a little slower when posting on these forums".

 

"Wellllll saaaid Tomo. Speeeeeak your mind maaaate and stand up for whats riiiiiiiight "

 

Kind regards

 

planey

[quote=ahlocks;

Dika carefully checked his wiring. re-examined the plumbing. tweaked a couple of more dials (just 'cuz he can) and flipped the switch.

Instantly a blood curdling scream erupted from above.....

The Captain and his first mate were standing on the conning tower at the time when the Captain copt it in the eye.

Being convinced that it came from a seagull, the first mate said "would you like a tissue to wipe it Sir:question:

"Dont be stupid man" replied the Captain, "that bloody bird will be miles away by now":hittinghead:

A little boy was sitting on the footpath with a bottle of Turpentine. He was shaking it up and watching all the bubbles.

A Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had.

The little boy said, 'This is the most powerful liquid in the world; it's called Turpentine.'

The Priest said, 'No, the most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water. If you rub it on a pregnant woman's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby.'

The little boy replied, 'What garbage, if you shake some of this on a cats behind, it'll pass a Harley Davidson !' :thumb_up::thumb_up::thumb_up:

Make that 18hours, never mind, here's breaking news:

Turbostealer has been working undercover again. There’s a police headline just appeared in the forums to say a police station toilet’s been stolen. We needed another in the subrollarine.

 

Now we can convert all the relief tubes to Zulu’s.

With everyone giving that sigh of relief, the redfaced:angry:crew gave a thunderous applaud :clap:and Tubs was happy in the thought that ElCrappy the Captain would be undeterred that the thing had been knocked off.

Dikka not being an ex-submariner thought he was doing the right thing drilling 103 holes in the hull, being of the opinion that the devices were self-draining:question:.

If this should fail, being an engineer,he thought, i'll simply switch a couple of wires behind the main panel and pump the effluent out of the periscope.

However, the Captain who likes to run a tidy ship, said he'd "kick the crap out of anyone not obeying his orders".

Below are some photos from this forum's Fly-in at Cowra this weekend.Thanks for posting the photo's Geoff.

 

Looks like the weather was ideal, certainly different to Narrromine at Easter.

 

Maybe Natfly should be shifted to somewhere like Cowra around this time of year, when the weather generally is a bit more settled

 

Sorry I could'nt make it, (maybe next year), but happy to know that you guys would have had a great time.

 

Kind regards

 

Planey

Real story .... happened with famous Heart Surgeon Dr. Nitu Mandke. He had done many heart operations.

A mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted the famous heart surgeon in his shop, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager to come to take a look at his car.

The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hello Doctor! Please come over here for a minute."

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively, "So doctor, look at this, I also open hearts, take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and when I finish, this will work like a new one.

So how come you get the big money, when you and I are basically doing the same sort of work?"

The doctor leaned over and whispered to the mechanic .....

"TRY TO DO IT WHILE THE ENGINE IS STILL RUNNING".;)

Good on you JG, at least you are following your dreams and making things happen that bring you happiness:thumb_up:.

I admire that, and it has got me thinking about my own situation.

Kind regards

Planey

Wow! That was great report. I managed to get red dust up my nose just reading it.

Sounds like there's quite a few potential traps out there if you don't do your homework.

Thanks for posting it JG.