The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Every question he asked, they answered with "Yes" followed by a long and evasive trail that left her asking "Please explain"............

...... which elicited the same response from the Secretary that "The response to such a question is beyond my pay grade, plus it is time for lunch, and the Canberra Floriade is on so we get a few days off, so can I take that on notice and I'll get back to you, Red."

 

Pauline spat chips on hearing that, before she ......

[turboplanner]

.......realised the typical evasion of an Academic.

"I have to do ALL the work around here!" she moaned, and then realised she had to put make up on and go out to the airport to greet the President of Tuvalu..............................

[Captain]

3 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......realised the typical evasion of an Academic.

"I have to do ALL the work around here!" she moaned, and then realised she had to put make up on and go out to the airport to greet the President of Tuvalu..............................

.... who had his hand out for another $Au 500 million because his islands were sinking (particularly after the BOM changed the height datum in the Pacific).

 

"No way Hose-A, or whatever is your moniker" said Pauline "I'm here to look after Aussies and Aussies alone, and I don't give a rats if you go with one of Xi's Bracers and Tracks Initiatives, like Mextoria nearly did."

 

"But missus, I've brought you a Prezzy" said the Tuvalu Prez.

 

"I don't take gifts" said Pauline, setting new Parliamentary standards, and she .....

[Captain]

Just 13 pages to go to reach 1000, Turdy.

 

We can make it, even if everyone else has buggered off.

Edited Friday at 12:40 AM by Captain

[turboplanner]

9 hours ago, Captain said:

Just 13 pages to go to reach 1000, Turdy.

 

We can make it, even if everyone else has buggered off.

The Vatican is watching the number of pages very carefully. No one has ever succeeded in writing more pages than VaticanScribes Inc.

[Captain]

8 hours ago, turboplanner said:

The Vatican is watching the number of pages very carefully. No one has ever succeeded in writing more pages than VaticanScribes Inc.

However, VSI doesn't have the dedication of two long term best mates (and tome writers) who have helped each other thru all of life's pitfalls and spent so much time in combat (combatting the mozzies up the Khyber [Blood sucking mozzies, not blood curdling Mussies, although there were a few of them too]).

[Captain]

18 hours ago, Captain said:

"But missus, I've brought you a Prezzy" said the Tuvalu Prez.

 

"I don't take gifts" said Pauline, setting new Parliamentary standards, and she .....

..... punted the Prez's prezzy off to some parliamentary aid so that it could be added to the National Estate and taken to one of the 27 museums in Canberra, but after a few months the museum realised that the Prez's prezzy was half a pig wrapped in palm fronds, so they ......

[turboplanner]

.......invited the Greens to a BBQ. Such was the status of this once powerful Party.

Four fights broke out oveer how they would ever get a vote again, and there were plenty of ribs at .........................

[Captain]

20 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......invited the Greens to a BBQ. Such was the status of this once powerful Party.

Four fights broke out oveer how they would ever get a vote again, and there were plenty of ribs at ......

...tacked as they all piled onto that portly bloke in the wheelchair with the double-barreled name ..... and the Teals, who had been invited to the barby based on their shared policies, also gave him a good kicking, and Zalli used him as a mogul while riding her skateboard.

 

Pauline got a giggle out of this blue, as none of these dingbats were now MPs, because all of their seats had been won by One Nation due to the punters just crossing out the names on the ballot and writing things like Pauline for PM, Pauline for Pope, Pauline for Queen (NTTIAWWT), and Pauline for ......

 

And while talking double barreled names, it is little known that Turbo's last name is actually Turbo-Planner as his Grandpa Turbine had hooked up with a member of the Planner family in a torrid affair that had rocked the Monarchy.

Edited Friday at 07:54 PM by Captain

[turboplanner]

......Governor General.

She was still smarting from the way the President showed her up on his arrival by snapping to attention (she didn't know what attention was) and marching along the Guard line with a complement here, licking his finger and getting a stain off there, and realised all she could offer them was fish and chips.

She started to wonder whether it was all worth it, then Albo came along on his Government issue electric scooter, giving her a snarl, and she knew the power of the ballot box.

The problem was that all those ballot boxes had been........................

[Captain]

5 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The problem was that all those ballot boxes had been......

.... certified by Dominion Shanghai PLC, and had been ......

[turboplanner]

.......then filled with what looked like genuine voting slips,and the boxes delivered the same way as AEC does. Dominion also provided a box minder, so when the second (AEC) batch arrived they were moved into the voting area, but when it was time for the count, the Dominion boxes came out. The scrutineers commented that this was the first year no informals had been received, but then just went ahead and signed off.

Now there was a little Hitler, who...................

[Captain]

12 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Now there was a little Hitler, who.......

.... wore a white lab coat and Blunstones, and he, (or she ...ifn it was a Hitlerette), stood on .....

[turboplanner]

a chair to shave,never brushed his teeth, aandwas a mysoginist,agenuine one - not like us accused, who decided take BigRed (as Pauline was known); he posted crap about her, argued with anyone who disagreed, called any defenders XXXXXXXs and generally made a nuisance of himself. This was not a good start to taking down Prime Minister, and BR had her admirers who .........

[Captain]

17 hours ago, turboplanner said:

a chair to shave,never brushed his teeth, aandwas a mysoginist,agenuine one - not like us accused, who decided take BigRed (as Pauline was known); he posted crap about her, argued with anyone who disagreed, called any defenders XXXXXXXs and generally made a nuisance of himself. This was not a good start to taking down Prime Minister, and BR had her admirers who .........

.... were experts on the interweb, so were able to hack into this Hitler person's profile and they found that this was really a Miss Oginist named Rachel, and she was merely jealous of BR's successes.

 

Rachel also had the hots for Tommy Robinson, so was envious of BR's time spent with him in the UK interviews, and fantasized about what might have happened off camera. That meant (as all of us studs know) that a jealous Rachel is way more dangerous than Hitler, Stalin and Mussolini combined.

 

Given this danger, BR called out the ADF for personal protection, and was allocated 6 raw recruits, that as an ADF in-joke were also all rangas, as they were apparently the only ones with working weapons that were not involved in giving evidence to the Brereton Inquiry or had been subpoenaed to attend the BRS court case.

 

Once Rachel saw BR and the ranga recruits all dressed in burqas, & looking like a line of bollards, she didn't ..... 

Edited 7 hours ago by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....want to hesitate, so she asked "Please Eexplain". It was too late; in an instant the ranga Raachel had her in a jaw grip and marched her out onto the street.....................

[Captain]

.... where she was humiliated in the worst possible way, by ......