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turboplanner

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Everything posted by turboplanner

  1. turboplanner
    I don't dismiss non-RAA accidents. because they cover long distance cross-country, busy airports more complex equipment, but I don't broadcast them to people who are just learning to fly every basic aircraft over short distances and will never encounter the issues in this area. No point in making people depressed about a lot of fatalities from things they will never e.cncounter.
  2. turboplanner
    Sure I see them, but I drill down to the categories to get like-for-like so it relates to RA aircraft, not some very complicated flight relating to IFR or a very complicated aircraft.
  3. turboplanner
    Well put it this way the base load of RA fatalies about ten years ago was about 12 people per year. If you are hearing of more than 12 per year in RA Australia, then its time for RAA t step up and take action.
  4. turboplanner
    ...a Rotax for the first time doesn't sound like a normal aircraft, and the noises may have been revving the engine over the farms which is a fairly common occurrance to alert the people inside the house.
  5. turboplanner
    Only because people have been reporting GA accidents, RPT accidents, Military accidents, and accidents from all over the world in countries with vastly different standards and regulations compared to Australia. Although RA don't seem to be reported as well as they used to be, and people don't see every Australian newspaper report on RA accidents, the RA fatalities still seem to be much lower than the 10 per year average of about ten years ago.
  6. turboplanner
    167 km/hr = 90 kts 56 km/hr = 30 kts 50 km/hr =27 kts
  7. turboplanner
    .......go into a pub where people on the land congregate and we're wearing crow feathers, they're more likely to give us a dose of BBs. Ever mindful of the time at the Gumly Gumply pub where he was chased down the road by cockys on 4 wheelers for releasing an expletive about waste grain on the sides of the road which he'd slipped on in the Land Cruiser, Cappy went out and shot four Wedge Tails, skun them, and was soon prancing around looking like Poking Honters. The four wheelers were lined up for a hundred metres, but this time he'd parked his Drifter with the Encabulator around the corner. It didn't take long ...........
  8. turboplanner
    George may have suffered the Pattersons Curse problem where people come back to life and start becoming younger and just where they're getting into it they start fallig over and going to sleep and becoming in the continent and stuff, and the Bros don't like that, so Cappy, a resourcefull fellow set about finding a herb which would clear George's affliction. Almost immediately .........
  9. turboplanner
    .......start a long-term resort rental business called Shangrila. The aim is to secure not the brash types who climbed the mountain on credit using crampons and ropes from chain stores, but the early explorers who may have had 250 pounds in the bank when they died, which has now compounded to six billion AU$. These people can afford the nightly fee for the best views in the resort and everyone's happy. Surprisingly this venture was started by OT who we would have thought wouldn't know a lot about extreme cold or a clean, sand-free climate, and it wouldn't be surprising to find that OT dusts the residents off once a day. The resort has also attracted .........
  10. turboplanner
    ......started putting the slabs back in the Jeep, but one had thawed out, lost his stiffness and was become relaxed. "I say old chap, would you have a cup of tea; the name's Mallory, George Mallory." Cappy fainted, the Jeep ............ Not many people know that George Mallory went missing with his fellow climber in 1924. They were believed (and still are in England), to have been the first to conquer Everest and were found years later on The North Face by a party of duck hunters. Even less people know that Cappy used the name to found a Company called The North Face which makes mountain climbing clothes based on Cappy's mountain climbing experience which is cleaning the leaves out of his gutters according to his wife Ethel.
  11. turboplanner
    ..........changed in appearance, now looking like 16 yos, and two of them were beginning to move as they thawed out, and then ..........
  12. turboplanner
    .......basket. Not many people know that the British Army, fighting in the Khyber Pass bought 500 war service US Army Jeeps because (a) the US hadn't been able to sell them, even at US$50.00 because everyone was buying Toyota Land Cruisers and (b) because the Khybers would sneak through the lines at night and steal any Land Rover starter motors because there were no spare parts. The Jeeps, unlike today's SUVs which don't even have Low Range because no one knows how to use it anyway, could go anywhere. Once on a weekend furlough from the fighting a Gurkha invited Cappy home. The Jeep climbed up into the mountains and through bogs effortlessly. After dropping off the Gurkha at his home they decided to continue up the mountains. There were Bengal tigers drinking from mountain streams unworried by the Jeep's presence, Dak Runners everywhere delivering the mail a letter at a time. The view kept getting better and better and eventually they reached the top of a mountain. "Someone's been here recently" shouted Cappy. Carved in the summit were the names "Ed Hillary" and "Tensing Norgay". After a quick meal of Energy Chocolate, they started driving back down. Brakes were not the strong point of the Willys Jeep and ............
  13. turboplanner
    .......look that up in the Oxford English Dictionary because most poms come from the Caribbean these days and don't eat .........
  14. turboplanner
    Get about a metre of 1/2" plastic tube; put one end up to your ear and poke the other end around the likely sources. This will localise the sound pick-up from surrounding noise, and you should be able to identify the exact area.
  15. turboplanner
    .....still wounded by the Chinese propaganda vilifying them for actions in Manchuria in 1930 when their grandfathers simply went across to China to take photos with the new Nikons which changed the world and led to those all night slide shows which usually led to Grandpa dropping the slide box or spraying the wall to kill a persistent fly leaving it looking like a forensics scene for years. The scrambled TJDF squadron heard Turbo shouting "TORA!" "TORA!" "TORA" (he'd got that from a movie) and the pilots went berserk; eyes squinting and thoughts only for the Emperor (who was watching a Los Angeles Dodgers ball game). They ripped into .......
  16. turboplanner
    ....saw the Emprass Mahjongg coming towards him slowly.........and then he was woken by Turbo whispering "We have to get out of here now! They're going to behead you at dawn". Turbo had risked his life by flying a Drifter in under the trees right up to the bottom of the Great Wall. Turbo knew the guards went home at dusk because really, who's going to steal it overnight. He expertly got the Ninja uniform over Cappy who was naked and ugly to the point of attracting attention from the Chinese. The Drifter made it under the trees and zoomed off into the gloom, but Chinese radar picked them up off the coast. It was now a race between Chinese fighter aircraft and the Turbine Japan Defence Force (TJDF) which had been scrambled from Sendai, but thanks to the Chinese pilots being slow to get out of bed ................
  17. turboplanner
    .......sounded much better than the A Flat he usually played juts to get attention, but the problem was whether to use it at the beginning to set the tone of the song or use it at the end as emphasis. He was thinking about this when he heard the sound of heavy footsteps which sounded like military men .............
  18. turboplanner
    ....fortune. It happened almost immedately when Cappy blurted out his price just as a What's App came in from Turbo. Chairman Xi was holding his phone up and it caught Cappy's face and words. Turbo didn't show that he'd seen and heard Cappy's treachery, just said to Chairman XI, are you up for a tiger shoot in Bengal Saturday; I'm bringing the Challenger over. (Turbo always let Chairman Xi have a fly) Xi quickly accepted and Turbo smoothly said "I've managed to get a better price on those machine guns from another manufacturer, and quoted a figure ten cents under Cappy" As we know that's not always going to change someone's mind if there's been a handshake, but Turbo's master stroke was to say "Have you seen that Captain Cook scoundrel; the guns he sold to North Korea keep jamming and he's needed down there to explain himself ......if he can." That did the trick and Ki said XXXX off! to Cappy, who was lucky to get through the gates of the Palace. A hundred metres down the road a Chinese Secret Police car...............
  19. turboplanner
    .......classified as Chinese, but of course there were some members of AUF who were, Like Mr Magoo, a few hours late in the Greenwich Meantime world. Cappy raced for the bathrooms but in has haste dropped his Panda shorts in the floor slot. He was frowned upon by several old men squatting and grunting and while quickly pulling his red shorts out of his pocket caught a compact gin bottle and it flicked straight towards the nearest old man who caught it and held it up, with a delighted grin to his mates. Cappy left that room with the code identifying him as a genuine Chinese of Mongol Ancestry (M. Polo 1210 - 1264) He strode confidently back into the meeting room and Chairman Xi welcomed him with open arms. "Should I buy these machine guns from Turbine Firearms, and Cappy the Nouveau Chink that he was said "No, I can supply cheaper". XI looked him straight in the eye and said "How much" Nes readers will know that Cappy never quite understood the skills required for marketing and at that cricial moment Cappy froze, much like his ancestor had done on Waikiki beach..........................
  20. turboplanner
    .....pandas and looked like she might be interested despite the threat of being beheaded by six terra cotta warriors, but just then OT walked in and .....
  21. turboplanner
    ...but Cappy broke in and said " that's BS, Chairman, we in the west know it's made of rocks and sand." Xi beamed; this man was not a fool (although it has to be said you can't be sure in just a few sentences) and he said "What I really want to do is knock out some of these Satellites which are spying on us every day as we go about our lawful business. Cappy .................
  22. turboplanner
    ......a most auspicious coming together of moons and this came to the notice of Chairman Xi who called Cappy in for a chat. Cappy's brassy mood (as shown by the self-promoting effort above) froze momentarily, but when he was ushered in Chairman Xi said "Cappy, I'm not interested in your usual XXXXXXX stories; my question is can we fit a machine gun to the front of your lunar module?" Cappy said "Yes, but why would you want to do that Chairman?" Xi said "I'm not supposed to tell you this, but ..............."
  23. turboplanner
    ...embarrassment in the Bombay Club that a descendant of Captain Cook should be a mere calque! "The last calque around here was taken out and fed to a Bengal Tiger, what!" said Sir William Orpington-Smythe who was prone to spreading gossip about others in the Club. Cappy ......................
  24. turboplanner
    ......balance....and we all know the importance of weight and balance. So cunning Cappy started offering Weight and Balance courses by a very experienced aviator who had beaten fearsome odds in places like the Ucayali tributary of the Amazon River where he had to fly under the trees with monkeys dropping on him now and again, Guinea Bisseau, The Khyber Pass and Kapooka. His tag line was "We can really shift your weight around!" As time went on there were rumours and ........................
  25. turboplanner
    ....those who had practised Upsets and basic Aerobatics all survived. it was a lesson to all there that...........
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