turboplanner

"......................the jet packs will go like a rat up a drainpipe"  and there was loud clapping and laughter as the media pack appreciated Turbo's humour.

"Doesn't is smell?" asked one female correspondent who hadn't been briefed and Turbo's lip started to curl, but he was whisked away to his helicopter smiling and yelling something no one could hear, just like the US Presidents and ...............

......Loxie. It's time we got off that train to nowhere and went flying at ...................

.........Turbina had a huge tattoo on her right shoulder saying “Ultralight Fliars (sic) get it in the air”

Cappy realised

........had in mind.

"I've had it with Australia" said Ly Chee who was a sycophant of  Xi Jinping, "I'm going to take all their CO2 away from them" and thousands of Chine hit WeChat agreeing with LyChee, although a few said he was a flog.

Xi Jinping cautiously agreed with this action and ...................

.....ly Chee as an experiment in market expansion, but a wayward Trump adviser had stamped all the vials with the image of a skunk, slowing sales and.....

....scent of jasmine from the Che Zell products lining the shelves so Turbo tipped a bucket of water over him, and he came spluttering back to life. 
“Remember Harry Wackett from the WW2 days?” He left us the complete plans for a home-built recreational aircraft with a BSA Bantam motor......
 

...........posted in 1943, but still lay on the front desk of the PRC. The President of the PRC Commodore Loxette (he wasn't a Commodore, just a FI, but he figured the students wouldn't pick that up) had seen the envelope there many times, and knew it was a hot potato, and also like a minefield - able to go off in any direction becaise they all had buried secrets, none more than Loxie.

This time it was too much for the Commodore; he grabbed the envelope, went behind the screen and opened it.

They found him there on the floor 30 minutes later, but it was too late; he .....................

[Cappy has just taken an enormous risk. In his weak attempt at humour he appears to have missed the Eye of The Family. We hope he can survive this, but many don't]

.......Latte at the Pilot's Rest Cafe, Wagga Wagga International Airport, which by the way is celebrating its 107th birthday today.

The PRC was established when the RAAF were using Longhorn Fighter Aircraft and after a session in one of them you sure needed a rest.

Some say Elsie, who looks after all the pilots today was there when it opened.

Not many people know that in WW2 Elsie was seconded to ASIO to watch for any suspicious activity, second nature to Wag Wags as we know, but in July 1943, what occurred has been only referred to in sealed files up until now. On that Tuesday morning ..................

Turbo will wait to see what is going on and whether it's under a rug, because Dr McSwain's wife is well known as being a female, however, the NES uncovers a lot of the dark side.

".............that you had publicly disgraced me" and a tear rolled from Loxie's eye, for this was an unforgiveable sin in Wagga Wagga wehere it was very difficult to be graced without falling off the Wagon. In fact the Biblical film "Saddam and Tomorrer" was filmed in Wagga because they were all natural actors who could say anything and be believed.

Cappy's guilty reaction sent his coffee flying all over Doctor McSwain's wife, the town gossip.

"What's this all about, and who's Bob? she asked and the two of them turned as white as sheets, and in a whisper Cappy.........

........comfort if the sporran broke loose and started thrashing around in the works,

Not many people know that the low scores by Scottish competitors at the Olympic Games are caused by loose sporrans.

It's unfortunate that Cappy had to make public the ownershop of the BoB because Loxie is a very private person, and the names he calls Mrs Loxie on Facebook every time he gets an awkward photo of her cover an admiration of her ability to run a business where three quarters of Wagga's population shows up after dark.

Loxie sits in the back office like all Nightclub bosses do in his black suit, black 1/2" tie and a cigar, a wall full of CCTV screens showing him what is going on in all parts of the facility, including out the front where Cappy's amaterish fumbling with various old boilers is added to the YouTube video "Cappy's Bloopers" which now extends to 93 minutes of laughter.

Loxie decided this time Cappy had gone to far and over the weekly cup of coffee, leaned over the table and said ".............

".........have a flight plan?"

Onesie looked at the WD with legs still pumping like a pair of FC Holden shock absorbers and said; "do you?" wherupon the WD, like a Facebook troll started to sing "DUYUDUYUDUYUDUYUDUYUDUYUDUYUDUYUDUYUDUYU" in time with his flying feet.

This was too much for the normally placid onesie and he aimed a high kick at .................

....Bond, Alan Bond.........Onsie, a fellow Western Australian, we must point out, cringed as he looked at the blackened, shrivelled face, and said a most ridiculous thing: "But you're dead!"

The face reshaped into a rictus of mirth; "ASIO thinks so, but I was flown out in a Turbine Aviation Challenger to Cusco in South America, but some head shrinkers got me; my hands were tied but a p!ssed on the fire and put it out, so while there's some shrinkage abd blackening, I'm still in working order" said the WD pointing to a line of wives.

Onesie ........

.......knucklebone.

OneTrack had once been a butcher, and this explanation was enough to quieten him down.

However he was part Mayanmarise, and we all know what that means, so the next day he visited.................

7 hours ago, Captain said:

CLARIFICATION REQUIRED DUE TO NES CONTINUITY PROBLEMS:

 

Given Turdy's latest post, is Ahlox actually bull .... or are they both from the same boxer litter ..... or is Turbo having his (well known) NES continuity issues again?

[Turbo admits he go it wrong, and the boxer was clearly Loxie; he apologises most profusely, and is currently on sick leave to spend more time with his family.  Moderator 17]

......labyrinth, having been splintered by the many hits below the belt adminstered by younger, more powerful and shorter boxers from the Tasmanian Boxing Association.

"They always told me boxing was a mug's game", said bull sadly, "that when you started you would be beaten by people who were bigger than you and more powerful, then as you got older they were younger than you and faster, but they never told me TBA had never banned HBBTB in deference to their convict past, or the other thing they do, which is ......................

[A photo of the bull Clan Tartan with young bull aged 12.

........phone book who once contained the number of every eligible chick in the Riverina, a strapping fireman who strapped his boys every day,

a man who could pick a lock, even if it wasn't locked, a good samaritan who gave travellers a moment of ecstasy when they accidentally locked themselves out of their car or house (a very short moment we should honestly report, but even when they fainted at the bill, he still took them to hospital), a daring flyer in his beercan (although no one can ever recall seeing it take off, just parked out in front of the hangar as he shampooed it every Saturday afternoon), and he was ..............

.......”All you can Eat” section of the Kapooka Club which served the left overs from Wagga Meals on Wheels every night.

Loxie, was still thinking of something to yell from the Pokies section but he just couldn’t stop pressing that button. NES readers will remember the clever and informative posts Loxie used to make, but these days he’s a sad case, going straight from Centrelink to KC and finishing the night lying by the side of the road, where Constable Doubtfire picks him up by the scruff of the neck, the CLANG! Ringing out as he hits the front wall of the Divvy Van. He used to be..........

On 28/02/2021 at 4:42 PM, Bruce Tuncks said:

I remember reading that the underwing campers got dust from aircraft taking off due to their site allocation.

This would have slowed me down as another thing to check out before going. How far is the camping area from the tie-down area this year?

130 km.

..............seed these comments, just as Counter Intelligence Agents like Turbo and Cappy do, get CASA to focus where we want them to focus. 

Helpful things like asking for 1500 kg MTOW so they can show that amateur flying has grown up and they can get rid of it once and for all, after giving these unruly people a couple of years of experiencing aviation from the inside; the cosy evenings in the country clubs with the safety teams, the welcome letters with stamps, and the ..........................

.......hands, for this aicraft was one of the first "broomstick control" types, and as we can see from Cappy's helpful photo above, within a few minutes she was flying hands-free.

NES readers should never underestimate the thoroughness with which CASA discharge their obligations to the Australian Taxpayer.  Even though the Governor's daughter accidently flew over the tiny town of Deloraine at fifty feet, the branches og a Plane Tree [avref] parted, and there was the unmistakeable clap of a digital camera and FoI Polkinghorne was feverishly transferring the HD file to his phone ready to flash it to CASA headquarters in Canberra itself.

Unfortuately for him, he'd almost completed the action when the Governor's daughter came past again and the flash caught him unprepared. As he slipped, he realised his branch was above a pig stye, and .................

..........mohawk hair which he had carefully nurtured for years, removing his complete scalp.

Jack screamed and lunged at the Governor's daughter but she caught him in the oats with a well aimed shoe.

Jack ..........

.....asked her if she flew a kite.[avref]

Mainlanders May not know the significance of this, but in Southern Tasmania (which excludes the scroats from Launceston) it has a very specific and anti-diversity meaning, so she picked up a piece of 4x2 and wrapped it around his ........

.........trouble and the Governor’s patience was sorely tested over the next few years, because as everyone knows there’s nothing to do after 5 pm when all the shops close except make trouble, and Jack b  made it with a capital ‘To grabbing the Governor’s daughter and tying her to the railroad tracks, and then realising there was only one train per fortnight and having to bring her McDonalds every night until it was due, then....

On 01/03/2021 at 7:01 AM, RFguy said:

Hi Turbs, you make a good point on the engine runtimes.  As a kid with Datsun engines for track I used to run a pipe cleaner through oil galleries and actually removed quite alot of rubbish , in attempt to improve oil flow. Those internals were generally cast (rough) finish that I think tended to catch and buildup.

 

What is state of art these days for block lube paths ? I used to (30 yrs ago) have dreams of aux high pressure oil sprays up the bottom of the piston and walls from a separate oil pump ..... oil foaming and bubbling  was stuff I didnt really understand how to avoid/correct then. glen

There are still engines with flow problems in galleries and manufacturers select oils which will handle the problem, or specify more frequent oil changes to do the equivalent of your pipe cleaner. I once connected one bank of a Ford 272 cu in V8 from a gallery with good flow to overhead gear on the opposite side with a piece of steel brake line. Worked like a charm.