turboplanner

Didn't any of you find the encrypted attachement?

What a dumb lot!

............not realising that the one with the blue hose was Argon" said ditDot, " which caused me to fart to the point where I could hardly breathe, so I had to turn it off."

"There's nothing like an education" said Rattus Homus, who in fact had received the most crucial part of his education at Henty Girls College every time the teachers went to Sydney for retraining.

Ah lots of interesting twists to Ah lot of the Ah story" said Rivets, Ah wonder where are Trevor went; he seemd such a nice person"

"Ah, the old grapes up the snout trick" said Turbo who remembered a wonderful day spent out the back of the Conargo Pub with his mates having a grape spitting contest with points for distance and double points for hitting the pub cockatoo which was sitting in its cage underneath a giant peppercorn tree.

The aim accuracy reduced exponentially with the consumption of stubbies, and thoughout the afternoon the old cockie said nothing, but dodged to the left and right just enough.

Late in the afternoon a grazier and his wife arrived in their Jaguar, and parked under the peppercorn tree.

The wide got out, and said "Ooh, what a nice cockie, hello pretty bird, scratch cockie?" followed by "OH, you NAUGHTY bird, AHJGFOUAFKU!........

....Von Hi Haus, whose intimate knowledge of WWII vintage aircraft mit der Mercedes engines, gave him away as a former SS Commodore designer, who wasn't above fitting the odd 20 mm machine gun to his products. he'd show ditDot what this game was all about........

....grammar and speeling also went west....

Turbo was struggling - he had no idea how big the transport industry really is. He thought you just grabbed a stubby, took out your teeth, tied a fox tail to the aerial and off you went.

Think 760 kg is complicated, try this, the 19 Metre B Double, or "Mini B Double" as our road authorities ( it is suspected provided the basis for the ASIC card) like to call it.

There's one for General Access - all the roads we drive or ride on (OK Mr Suzuki?)

Then there's a version with different dimensions for "Approved Routes"

Then if Cappo can calm down there are four different sets of weight limitations.

Now, take out your pencils and design a Prime Mover to handle all these configurations....and that's before the customer comes in and wants to order his personal sleeper with microwave and cooking facilities.....aaaaargh.......

Trevor's light hearted quip brought dotDash back to life.

He'd never heard of Western Australia until he went to see "Rabbit Proof Fence", and after that he thought West Australians were a pack of b*st*rds, so he decided to go over to Albany to sort things out.

The only aircraft in Dalby that fateful day was a Baron, but as a freshly licensed Drifter handler he thought "What can be hard about this - you just have to start two engines instead of one".

As he entered the runway and lined up, his radio communications dripping with the drawl of the Commercial Pilot, the aircraft started to roll.

About a third of the way down the strip dotDash thought "This hasn't got any more power than the Drifter", and about halfway down he was becoming mildly uncomfortable.

He was in coarse pitch............

and worse than that, it wouldn't have any flow.............

...push on, regardless, although it seems that the Inspectors have caught up with dotDash over the Tartic affair, and the only way he's going to get out of it is to take them to a BNS ball.

We all know city slickers are never the same after one of those - they're better than a University education.

McLock cursed at the skipper's question - he'd just counted to 16334 rivets and was getting close to the finish.

"It's not easy when all you've got is your fingers...." he said, and resignedly turned back to the task; "One, two, three, four, five, change hands....."

"....or they would be if I wasn't designing about 30 seconds ahead of truck production, where any calculation slip mans "ross of face", so the head job has to wait for a few days...."

Back at CASA they were talking bout ditdot's epic journey and what charges they could lay regarding the illegal low flying incident, even though he was a passenger.

"He's getting worse!" said Inspector1 (they, like the SAS, don't give out names, and Inspector1 had been lurking around Dalby for a couple of months disguised as a Dogger).

"Yes" said Inspector2 "he's been putting off gyro pilots when they are trying to land, I hear, by giving radio calls just when they are about to touch down"

"That's right, I took the report" said Inspector 1 squinting through his Raybans, because it was dark inside, "it wasn't so much what he said, but the Queensland accent."

"First time I've heard of a gyro pilot worrying about a radio when he was trying to land" said Inspector3 "they usually just come straight in from 50 feet and there's a big bang which would drown out the pound anyway"

I think we'll let the young guy off this time said Inspector1.

There was a shuffling outside - somone had been listening at the door. They raced out to see a ratlike person running round the corner.....

The rain was too late for dotDash. There he was standing next to what was once a beautiful white R22, but was now sandblasted by flying icebergs, crudely painted red (as only Queenslanders can do), with one bent skid (dotDash forgot to tell us about that), an engine which now needed a valve grind (don't tell the Jab haters about that), and a liberal dosing of Swine Flu virus.

The owner angrily approached dotDash, who had already been bawled out by a nutcase pilots who liked listening to recordings of himself as he did his circuits, and objected to formal radio communications, and was about to get into more trouble for using the racial discrimination term "Mexicans".

From the other direction came Stan's a hero, who'd been washed down by the rain (it's not generally known that that's what wheat cockies do - Turbo used to drive to Horsham just before rain when the daughters came out - they were alright after about 50 mm.

dotDash started to run, while looking over his shoulder.....

sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSCHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Graham, any chaf running us through the sequence from when the engine cut?

We've all practiced forced landings with an engine idling, knowing we are going top lift off it turns sour and often with an instructor who helpfully guides us out of difficulty, but hearing about the real thing may help us manage to achieve what you did.

From the beer can philosphy flowing freely here, you'd think we were at Bathurst!

Thread headings which hang around like a bad smell forever, like:

"What's wrong with the Jabiru" and

"Why do lots of people dislike Jabirus"

can be very distressing to a manufacturer who is out there trying to do the best for his customers.

On this occasion it's Jabiru copping it in the neck, but these comments apply equally to any other product.

What often happens is that the manufacurer reacts to minority criticism rather than calming down and considering the majority of satisfied customers and makes changes which destroy the product.

For example, Jabiru might assume from these comments that it should change the product to compete with the Tecnam. The millions in development costs have to be allocated against the sale price, so the prices become the same.

Now you have a SuperJab with more comfort, more speed, more range than the Tecnam at the same price, but the majority can't afford either of them, so the product fails, and the fallout is that training affordability takes a tumble.

Pioneer200, I'm not suggesting you started this thread with the intent of anything other than curiosity, but it's a pity we are now repeating the trend of an earlier thread.

....and so it came to pass that the Evinrude defied its history and made a second successful trip to the Tartic where Tubz and DitDot had a quick meal of seal blubber, a short swim, kick started the R22 and made their way back home....or almost.

Somewhere between Albury and Wagga, dashDash got mixed up between the Wagga tip and The Rock and veered off track.

He had enough fuel to get home, but as he approached Dalby realised he was desperate for a can of Coke, and so had to divert to Toowoomba.

Looking down at the apron he gazed into the steely eyes of the ASIC card inspector.....

Now that is a very nice piece of reportingness Captain!:thumb_up: but one drastic problem is that Dalby doesn't have a Bunnings!

Yes, fair go Captain, this isn't Wagga Wagga you know - they've put their application in for the electric light, and all babies are immunised when the serum arrives, but you have to go to Toowoomba for things like bread and screwdrivers......

yes, and it would be interesting to know how many people CASA employs overseeing this can of spaghetti.

Even if we had a Master Index which showed us what we needed for each training stage and licence category, and where we could get it.

...............at one of your wineries, Destiny?............

Yes, Tomo, never bait him - he just delays the clients breakfasts and get you early in the morning whn you are half asleep; very rat-like behaviour, but now and again we have a win............

In the post prescriptive era there are two considerations:

(a) an offence of strict liability means you are in it deep, so if that's attached, it's not voluntary.

(b) If something does go wrong, and you knew about the requirement but had argued it was voluntary, you're pretty well looking at a criminal charge for negligence, because there's no argument that the accident happened, which destroys your argument that your decision was safe.

Ah Tomo, how quick you were to suggest I hadn't put oil in the fuel............, but OK, you write the trip report down to the Tartic again....

Stupid is as stupid does

Anyone got any answers yet?

The next Chapter involves calculating weight distribution, so you'll need to be able to do this Chapter's calculations in order to have a chance of getting the weight distribution calculations correct.

I'm a poddy calf riding champion from way back, but Moy, I'd definitely put in some time with a Jab instructor rather than try to do it by correspondence.

I counted using the large grass patch, got to about 10 or 11.

Yes.

You are probably doing a lot of skidding on the grass, where the bitumen is grabbing the tread.

Eugene Reid maintains the Jab steers much better on the landing roll with back stick.

The trick is to do it as the mains touch, without touching down with too much nose up. Get an instructor to ride you for a few circuits until you are comfortable