The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

29 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo took his friend and close workmate Nobushi to Ballarat for a conference one day. They arrived early, so Turbo took him to the memorial site of those brave miners.

Nobushi, after taking 34 photos burst into tears bowing profusely and said "Did we do this Turbo"? Such were the school lessons taught in Japanese schools about WW II. 
"NEBBER AGAIN!!!  the teacher would chant and the students would repeat it sincerely, not having the faintest clue what it meant.

Turbo raises a very poignant point and one which is often overlooked or avoided by less astute historians, as it is little known about the involvement of the Japanese contingent who were embedded in the British Army’s 12th Regiment of Foot (known subsequently as the East Suffolk Miner Killers) and the 40th Regiment of Foot who proudly added the name of 2nd Somersetshire Tent Burners to their battle flag.
 

However, it was the Japanese within the pommy units who added the Hotbox and the Samurai Sword to their interrogation techniques.

 

So Nobushi's sad outburst was well founded, and the Japanese were the reason that Peter Lalor lost his arm, when Nobushi's great, great, great grampy tried to behead Pete, but the sword slipped.

Edited November 21, 2025 by Captain

[turboplanner]

......bite like a Viper. Turbo himself started this company, even though it meant 7 years of uni plus another 10 years as an intern which declared "served" because he owned the company. Turbo had learnt his craft as the State Tribunals began to be infested by lawyers. For example an outrageous block of land covered in old junk including dozer tracks, blades, seized petrol starter motors stacks of grousers and weed shoulder high in which rats, mice and snakes bred was not a dump to be cleaned up as Mr Smithers of Dob and Inn, had said, but by definition an active Depot and therefore not able to be changed in any way. And that was at the Practice Meeting before the case even started, so they all went home after fifteen minutes. 

The AA Skipper had good reason to be confident, but...................

 

[Captain]

26 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

And that was at the Practice Meeting before the case even started, so they all went home after fifteen minutes. 

The AA Skipper had good reason to be confident, but.......

..... he had a bad case of Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS) and had voted for Active Joey Biden the Citizen's Friend, time for Hope and Change etc.

 

However, after meeting his Special Counsel, his TDS soon morphed into Turdbro Derangement Syndrome as Tubb's blonde hair and sunbed afterglow meant that our best mate looks like a cheap cross between Andrew Peacock, Jacinta Knitajumper Price, Warren Mundine (AO, 13 Plus and Adult Advisory, PGM), bull, and .......

[turboplanner]

.......Barnaby Joyce who decided to leave the NATS after being  banned from all paddocks in Australia for low flying a Thruster while on his back snoring.

 

He has reacted harshly for being banned from ........................

 

 

Turbo has been down in the hills of southern Victoria checking out fire trucks and coming up with better systems such as fitting them with water tanks.

[Captain]

9 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo has been down in the hills of southern Victoria checking out fire trucks and coming up with better systems such as fitting them with water tanks.

Thank goodness that Turbo is back, so will all of the members of Wreck Flying, & of Aircraft Pilates, stop calling me with your messages of concern. The great man is well and has just been off, down south, doing some more of his trucking BS again.

 

To those 5 or 6 members that he has chastised previously in the technical forums, bad luck, Turbo is still alive and well.

[Captain]

9 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....Barnaby Joyce who decided to leave the NATS after being banned from all paddocks in Australia for low flying a Thruster while on his back snoring.

He has reacted harshly for being banned from .....

... the AUF, although a rebel group (known as the TP/OT [or TeaPot] faction) has also nominated Barny-Bee for the Board, and if he does join the AUF Board plus become a member of One Nation as a result of Pauline's steak cooking skills, he will soon learn that they go together like a .......

Edited November 27, 2025 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......fish and chip wrapper; steak on the inside, but having to eat greasy paper to get there.

 

Pauline knew this of course, so she came out with Paperless Steak, supplied very cheaply by  Turbine Paperless Steak Company - We give you Bull every day! Pty Ltd.

 

But those in the financial industry who knew the parent company structure wondered .......................

[Captain]

11 hours ago, turboplanner said:

... fish and chip wrapper; steak on the inside, but having to eat greasy paper to get there.

Pauline knew this of course, so she came out with Paperless Steak, supplied very cheaply by  Turbine Paperless Steak Company - We give you Bull every day! Pty Ltd.

But those in the financial industry who knew the parent company structure wondered .....

.... whether Turbo's close association with Bill Gates, Tony Mokbel, and the Korean Yakuza leader, Won Track, might mean that the paper is not 86% recycled and the beef is ......

 

One of Tony's original wigs was brought back from Greece & takes pride of place in the Pool Room at Turbo's Toorak mansion.

Edited November 30, 2025 by Captain

[turboplanner]

Not many people know that this was actually Turbo's wig; Turbo had a bad case of head lice after staying up at the Spratleys resort after Cappy had been shacked up with a couple of Polynesian squeezes, apparently polishing up his Native Dancing for Beginners book.

 

Turbo felt that Tony had been misunderstood and badly treated, and told Tony to keep it, but Tony posted it back; that's the sort of person he is.

 

Won Track helped him out with the loan of a Cat D7 and Tony drove it from Esperance to Geraldton in three and a half days at its travel speed of  10.54 km/hr. No one took any notice of the D7 or its driver in blue singlet, shorts, thongs and spray tan like Trumps, and Tony departed on Cappy's yacht "Endeavour" without incident.

 

 

 

[onetrack]

.....ersatz beef, also known as "fake meat", which enrages the average red-meat-eating, manly man. However, when the fake meat is dressed up like Tony in a wig, this brings out the very worst in the meat-lovers, and it has been known for them to attack displays of fake meat products in shops, which then leads to..........

[Captain]

On 30/11/2025 at 6:31 AM, Captain said:

Cappy has just realised that Tony's mustache must have also been false, and is now being worn by Turbo, as he has the same snot-line. I will find another photo of the mustachioed Tubb and post it asap.

Edited December 1, 2025 by Captain

[Captain]

19 hours ago, onetrack said:

... ersatz beef, also known as "fake meat", which enrages the average red-meat-eating, manly man. However, when the fake meat is dressed up like Tony in a wig, this brings out the very worst in the meat-lovers, and it has been known for them to attack displays of fake meat products in shops, which then leads to ....

.... the shops making public statements about fake meat, which then encouraged Australian ladies to also fake it, but Won Track thought that was OK because it makes him seem to be a ....

[Captain]

22 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Won Track helped him out with the loan of a Cat D7 and Tony drove it from Esperance to Geraldton in three and a half days at its travel speed of  10.54 km/hr. No one took any notice of the D7 or its driver in blue singlet, shorts, thongs and spray tan like Trumps, and Tony departed on Cappy's yacht "Endeavour" without incident.

Miscellaneous D7's driving around WA are now part of the "What's on in WA" website, so WA Tourism urges you stop them and take a Happy Snap, as after the recent census, there are now more D7's in WA than there are Quokkas on Rotty.

[turboplanner]

........part of the Millennial era where people eat cat meat disguised as stake, faking it is making it, and Won Track fitted in as a "Leader" because he'd paid $750,000.00 for a mint condition Quicksilver GT400, the Ultralight with the REAL tricycle undercarriage and full enclosed with a heater. He had a big throng of starlets and stuff hanging around him wanting to be taken up for aerobatics, which in Won Trask's case consisted of taking off flying around and making a landing without losing it or seizing the motor.

 

One of his passengers was ......................

[Captain]

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

... part of the Millennial era where people eat cat meat disguised as stake, faking it is making it, and Won Track fitted in as a "Leader" because he'd paid $750,000.00 for a mint condition Quicksilver GT400, the Ultralight with the REAL tricycle undercarriage and full enclosed with a heater. He had a big throng of starlets and stuff hanging around him wanting to be taken up for aerobatics, which in Won Trask's case consisted of taking off flying around and making a landing without losing it or seizing the motor.

One of his passengers was .....

.... impressed to the point of fawning, and particularly when Won went into great details on the difficulties and dangers of "The Circuit" and in particular the "Impossible Turn" to Base (avref).

 

The crowd gasped at his mention of the "Impossible Turn".

 

"The aerobatic maneuver named the "Won-Track-Himmelmann" is an embellishment on the bog standard Himmelmann, as the original Charlie Himmelmann was a bit of a pussy, and the WTH is a piece-of-p*#$ compared with the dangers of Straight-&-Level in the circuit, (particularly when there is a Crop Duster flying a turbine powered Air Tractor AT-802A, so he thinks it is his circuit, and his alone) which you have seen me fly with impeccable touch, coordination and finesse,  ........ but then having to also turn to ..... 

[Captain]

4 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.... part of the Millennial era where people eat cat meat disguised as stake, faking it is making it, and Won Track fitted in ....

Cat meat disguised as a stake.

Edited December 2, 2025 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....and in fact had registered the Company CM Stake products and was selling fence posts in the agricultural areas of Australia in the tens of thousands. The numbers went into the hundreds of thousands when the US McDonalds advisor gave them a lick.

 

 This created a very embarrassing episode for Turbine Thoughtful and Kind Farms Inc. who were running out of rat food, upsetting the balance of the delicate Cat Skinning process. Turbo engineered a rat plague up in the Mallee where millions of tonnes of grain from the season's harvest were just lying on the ground under huge tarps.

 

The rats quickly multiply and soon there were Turbine Cleanup trucks running around the district sucking of the rats and putting them live into refrigerated semi trailers. The theory was that that rats would be both dead and frozen when they arrived at the Queensland farms, but ...............................

 

 

[Captain]

20 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The theory was that that rats would be both dead and frozen when they arrived at the Queensland farms, but .........

.... the Turbine rats took after their company founder (tough, resilient and resourceful) and used tiny little rat sized North Face quilted parkers plus teensy little Collingwood socks, both of which allowed them to survive to hit the tropics in force, and take on the Cane Toad infestation that was heading south.

 

The result was a ........

[Captain]

52 minutes ago, Captain said:

tiny little rat sized North Face quilted parkers plus teensy little Collingwood socks,

The Head Rat purchased these with rat bitcoin on the dark web from a very shady Turdbine Animal Clothing Store. Below is an example from their Catalogue, as the North Face Quilted Parkas sold out to those rats in the NES.

Edited December 2, 2025 by Captain

[turboplanner]

........massacre..........a massacre with bits of cane toad littering the roads along with the occasional cane toad appearing to dance as the rat inside tried to get out.

 

The newspapers...........

[Captain]

17 hours ago, turboplanner said:

........ massacre..........a massacre with bits of cane toad littering the roads along with the occasional cane toad appearing to dance as the rat inside tried to get out.

The newspapers ...........

..... branded the Rat army as right wingers and Nazi party members, while they characterized the Toads as immigrant asylum seekers, and suppressed all photos of Toads yelling Palestinian slogans, calling "From the Hinterland to the Sea, Queensland shall be free", below a placard of Greata Thumbird, who's similarity to a toad did not go without comment.

 

Nigel Farage and Donald Trump sent pre-recorded messages of support for the Rats and Chris Bowen took .......

 

Edited December 2, 2025 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....up the wet and smelly rag of the Toads. Many people who saw the march that day commented that Chris had finally found his niche.

Over time the movement spread with the Toads tending to spread north among friends and the rats headed

for Collingwood and would march down the streets showing their teeth to goad the locals, but the locals couldn't ..............................

[Captain]

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Over time the movement spread with the Toads tending to spread north among friends and the rats headed for Collingwood and would march down the streets showing their teeth to goad the locals, but the locals couldn't ......

.... care, or couldn't understand, why they should be the goad-ees when they had made it into the Prelim Final this year.

 

But then, the Rats knew that the Toads were rejoicing up in Qld with the Premiership in hand and tiny little toad sized Lions jerseys had been supplied by the club on a complimentary basis.

 

By comparison, the Quokkas on Rotty and the Tazzy Devils on the Sth Island had nothing much to celebrate and were seeking to .....

[Captain]

Cappy adds the following (avref) as there haven't been too many lately, and in deference to the affiliation of the NES with Wreck Flying and Aircraft Pilates.

[turboplanner]

But Cappy, engrossed in his morning porridge combined with the latest actions of Vlodymyr, Vladimir (neither willing to share vowels), and Don forgot to add the (avref), which was a story about the Quicksilver GT400 (Avref 100%) heretofore introduced into the NES by the actions of Wontrak.

 

..........allow steroids in those locations to get an even chance against Wise Men From The East, and Mainlanders, but after a democratic meeting where every team had an equal vote, and .......

Edited December 3, 2025 by turboplanner