turboplanner Posted October 28 Posted October 28 .......nuts promised to tell one of his stories in a reading at the Chevron Hotel in Surfers where he ...................
Captain Posted October 28 Posted October 28 (edited) 4 hours ago, turboplanner said: .......nuts promised to tell one of his stories in a reading at the Chevron Hotel in Surfers where he ................... .... carried a large Warwick Cappercino, wore a Meter Maid's bikini, and stuck a ..... It was the bikini in the middle that fitted him best ...... but Rudy asked the other 2 lasses to take theirs off so that he could try them on. (What a cad). Wazza doesn't like publicity or the limelight, but allowed us to take this photo, after giving Rudyard his Cappercino. Edited October 28 by Captain
turboplanner Posted October 29 Posted October 29 .....kitten through the fence in the Dreamworld tiger enclosure and phoned DW to say one of the tigers had a baby. For a few days Rud was the talk of the town until Turbo took him up to the top of the Big Drop, telling Kipling it was the Gold Coast Tourist Lookout, and to hold his mongoose tightly. As they were going up Turbo was extolling the advances of the Gold Coast and how much better the lift was than the stairs in the old days, and Rud was taken in. As Turbo began to point out the landmarks, someone in a Thruster headed straight for the tower. They both knew it was a Thruster from that ducking, weaving motion, ...........................
Captain Posted October 29 Posted October 29 16 minutes ago, turboplanner said: They both knew it was a Thruster from that ducking, weaving motion, ...... .... identified by the NTSB as a TIO, and no longer as a PIO, so all of the Thruster pilots were absolved from their IOing and the fault reverted to the .....
onetrack Posted October 29 Posted October 29 ...........manufacturer of that particular version of the Thruster, a dubious backyard operator registered as Turbine Thrusters Inc. The TIO Cappy refers to, actually stands for "Turbine Induced Oscillations", as these particular Thruster models were noted for scrimping on the number of rivets and fasteners, and thus they performed like a GAF Nomad that was built on a Friday night by the factory cleaning crew, on their coffee break. The ducking and weaving aerial movements of the TTI version of the Thruster was simply due to structural flexing and panel warping, and to say it made for an interesting style of performance would be the understatement of the year. In fact, when Kitplanes tested the TTI Thruster, it was only some time after landing, that ground crew could force open the fingers of the white-faced test pilot from around the control column, and even then...................
Captain Posted October 30 Posted October 30 (edited) 1 hour ago, onetrack said: In fact, when Kitplanes tested the TTI Thruster, it was only some time after landing, that ground crew could force open the fingers of the white-faced test pilot from around the control column, and even then....... ..... he had filled-his-dacks (a well-known 3-word aviation (avref) expression. "And that is why I could not allow the Thruster to go inverted" he said "As it would have run down ...... Edited October 30 by Captain 1
Captain Posted October 30 Posted October 30 (edited) When the NES speaks of PIOs, Cappy, as a very experienced SuperDooperCFI, always thinks of the hundreds of Stewed Ants who visit the NES daily, and in doing so via the video below, he has been able to combine lessons in Thruster PIO and in the flying achievements of his best mate. You will all have seen and admired the F16 photo which is the avatar of the great man (TGM). It is little known that TGM was involved in the development and proving of the F16 and below is a little film that Cappy took from his spot in the rescue vehicle. The PIOs are obvious, and yes, the TGM was doing the so-called flying. See near the end where the pilot runs from the aircraft on the grass. That is the fastest I have ever seen Turbo move ......... but then again, it was over 50 years ago. Edited October 30 by Captain 1
turboplanner Posted October 30 Posted October 30 ...........the side of the canopy and the TGM knew that before he could wipe it, off the canopy would be acidified by the mix; it was better to go upside down, put it down hard and it would be as green as a dog's xxxx after grass dragging. TGM savours that landing, called "impossible" by the other test pilots, but Turbo just smiled and said "That's what they pay us the big bucks for" and everyone.............. 1
Captain Posted October 30 Posted October 30 3 minutes ago, turboplanner said: TGM savours that landing, called "impossible" by the other test pilots, but Turbo just smiled and said "That's what they pay us the big bucks for" and everyone........ .... gasped with admiration (some also with lust), broke into rapturous applause, and presented TGM (our own beloved Turdy) with a photo of an F16 on behalf of all Western Nations (the back was signed by Eddy Heath, Butro Butros Galli, Bill Clinton, Monica Lewinsky and Harold Holt [pre swim]). That photo, signed on the obverse, is the very one used as TGM's avatar, so it means ...... 1
turboplanner Posted October 30 Posted October 30 .........a lot to him, showing the takeoff for the specially approved upside down flight between the buildings and past the balcony of Buckingham Palace, for his beloved Queen (the flight photo was ruined by that out-of-control little pest Prince Andrew climbing over the balustrade and ....... 1
Captain Posted October 30 Posted October 30 (edited) 1 hour ago, turboplanner said: .........a lot to him, showing the takeoff for the specially approved upside down flight between the buildings and past the balcony of Buckingham Palace, for his beloved Queen (the flight photo was ruined by that out-of-control little pest Prince Andrew climbing over the balustrade and ....... ..... holding someone less than half his age, while Turbo, half inverted, flashed a smile at his (Andy's) Mum and also at Anne, because at that stage of his adventurous life, Turbo had always fancied a cucumber sandwich, and was going through his mother & daughter experimental phase, and Anne had always ...... Edited October 30 by Captain 1
turboplanner Posted October 31 Posted October 31 ......pointed out the front end of the horse when Turbo was riding dressage. Turbo was not a horse-person and Anne was an Aussie at heart, although she'd never been to a BNS Ball to learning phrases like "You XXXXXXX" or .......... 1
Captain Posted October 31 Posted October 31 (edited) 1 hour ago, turboplanner said: ......pointed out the front end of the horse when Turbo was riding dressage. Turbo was not a horse-person and Anne was an Aussie at heart, although she'd never been to a BNS Ball to learning phrases like "You XXXXXXX" or .......... .... "Do ya", ....... or "Does your 'Vette have a back seat", or "If you perform well, it will be "Arise, Sir Turbo" or ..... Edited October 31 by Captain 1
turboplanner Posted November 2 Posted November 2 .......many other down to e arth statements which would qualify her up there with the best of the BNS stars and weren't they amazing. Turbo remembers one night after the steaks were on the open fire, and Cappy had one the circle work with his P76 Ute, an unlikely contender but driven within an inch of its life with liberal use of ......
onetrack Posted November 2 Posted November 2 .........plastic bonder (to hide the gaping rust holes), metres of fencing wire (to make sure the doors stayed shut after they were closed), multiple numbers of Tek screws (to hold the reinforcing plates over the panel cracks), and a gross of nails to use as temporary fuses when the electrics went...........
Captain Posted November 2 Posted November 2 10 hours ago, onetrack said: .........plastic bonder (to hide the gaping rust holes), metres of fencing wire (to make sure the doors stayed shut after they were closed), multiple numbers of Tek screws (to hold the reinforcing plates over the panel cracks), and a gross of nails to use as temporary fuses when the electrics went........... ..... kaput every time it rained, so his 1st bag of nails was used up, and he used the 2nd to explain to Anne what it means at a B&S Ball when, in the middle of a progressive barn dance somebody asks, " Are you interested is getting nailed?" and you ....... 1
onetrack Posted November 2 Posted November 2 .......add, "I'm recommended as the best nailer in town!". Anne thought for a moment, and said in that plummy Windsor accent (that's Received Pronunciation to you plebs), "Oh my Gosh, Yes, I do believe may horse is in need of new shoes. I'm very glad I've found an Orstralian who can look after may horses, so can you please present at .............
Captain Posted November 3 Posted November 3 (edited) 3 hours ago, onetrack said: .......add, "I'm recommended as the best nailer in town!". Anne thought for a moment, and said in that plummy Windsor accent (that's Received Pronunciation to you plebs), "Oh my Gosh, Yes, I do believe may horse is in need of new shoes. I'm very glad I've found an Orstralian who can look after may horses, so can you please present at ............. ..... the stables where one can be my "Farrier"" ........ (and with that came a knowing giggle). "Great deflection, Annie. You are a beauty-bottler" said oneroot, (hot on the trail of #2) "I shall front up at the stables as your personal farrier, and after shoeing your horses, we can get some fresh hay into the stall (avref) and ..... Edited November 3 by Captain 1
onetrack Posted November 3 Posted November 3 (edited) .... I can start the job!" "Just hold on a minute, OT", said Anne. "Before we start, as a matter of Royal policy, I need to sight your testimonials". OT was horrified. "But I haven't got any!", he said. "I've never been asked this before, by anyone with horses I've ever serviced! Besides, it's not my style to produce my testimonials before I start - although I believe that daring Cappy has been known to flash his testimonials to anyone within sighting distance, and I believe he's gotten himself into trouble by producing his testimonials when no-one asked him to, and this was..... Edited November 3 by onetrack
turboplanner Posted November 3 Posted November 3 .........before things started to atrophy. Hearing the word "trophy" Cappy woke up from his nap. PA said "Who are you?" and he started the long titles handed down from 8 generations of Cooks. PA turned back to her horse and continued grooming it and Cappy was left at .............. 1
Captain Posted November 3 Posted November 3 10 hours ago, turboplanner said: .........before things started to atrophy. Hearing the word "trophy" Cappy woke up from his nap. PA said "Who are you?" and he started the long titles handed down from 8 generations of Cooks. PA turned back to her horse and continued grooming it and Cappy was left at .............. ...trophied. at ease, yet proudly at attention. "Wow" said PA "I've seen a few, but you are certainly still at attention while you are standing at ease. That is very impressive and my stallion, Blackie, is envious, so I guess that I can make an exception and go to the ball with a Colonial". "No wuckers Annie, and I'll make an exception too" replied Cappy "As I usually prefer B&S Scrubbers, but in this case I will ....... 1
turboplanner Posted November 3 Posted November 3 .......exception, as long as you don't wear those long gowns and sashes. I'll lend you a pair of RM moleskins and I've just broken in, after eight years, a pair of RM boots you can have. PA responded "That's OK Cappy I've got my own RM Moleskins and boots from the campdrafting competititions. Mummy thought I was doing dressage in the coat and jhodpurs, but what happens at the Gympie Muster stays at the Gympie Muster and here's a photo of me bull riuding at the "Curry". Cappy looked at her with a new respect; "You're not looking for a bodyguard are you?" he asked "I'm from the Khyber Brigade where we sometimes had to shoot at point blank range!" Given that the only point blank range shot he fired in that war was into Turbo, that was a bit rich, but PA said ...................................... 1 1
Captain Posted November 3 Posted November 3 (edited) 2 hours ago, turboplanner said: ... and here's a photo of me bull riding at the "Curry" ... Cappy's only comment is that he is envious, as bull seemed to be enjoying it immensely ..... and he did not seem to be moving any more than he needed to (that was a complaint from the Coffee Lady too) in case PA fell off & bent her crown. Edited November 3 by Captain 1
Captain Posted November 3 Posted November 3 (edited) 2 hours ago, turboplanner said: Cappy looked at her with a new respect; "You're not looking for a bodyguard are you?" he asked "I'm from the Khyber Brigade where we sometimes had to shoot at point blank range!" Given that the only point blank range shot he fired in that war was into Turbo, that was a bit rich, but PA said ..... ..... "As long as you don't plug me there (with your three-oh that is, & where Turbo is oozing from) you are hired dear Cappy. BTW, let's have a PIMS to get you all loosened up, and do you put in more effort than bull?" Cappy, ever the loyal mate, said "You need to make some allowance for bull, like we all do, as he is only around occasionally and his shift button is broken, as are a few of his other buttons, but he is a ....... Edited November 3 by Captain 1
onetrack Posted November 4 Posted November 4 ......Tasmanian who managed to flee to warmer tropical waters, so he can't be all bad. And it is a shame he's missing a few buttons on his shirts and jackets, but bull never learnt to sew them back on, and besides, he reckons they're just a nuisance at the best of times, he prefers zippers and press studs, because they're so much faster for access! "Ooooh!!", said PA, "I must say, I do prefer a man who rips things off in a hurry, when it comes to getting access to the important parts!" "Well", said Cappy, "Talking about ripping off things, did you ever...............
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