My Next Life . . . . .

[Phil Perry]

MY NEXT LIFE

 

by George Carlin

 

 

 

I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that out of the way.

 

 

 

Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.

 

 

 

Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're too young to work.

 

 

 

You get ready for High School: drink alcohol, party, and you're generally promiscuous.

 

 

 

Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you have no responsibilities.

 

 

 

Then you become a baby, and then... You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully

 

in Spa-like conditions - Central heating, room service on tap, and then...

 

 

 

You finish off as an orgasm.

 

 

 

I rest my case.

 

 

[facthunter]

I'm a biological orga(ni)sm in a hostile universe already. Nev