If I Died

[Guest Thrasher]

If I died

 

Woman: Would you get married again if I died?

 

Man: Definitely not!

 

Woman: Why not -- don't you like being married?

 

Man: Of course I do.

 

Woman: Then why wouldn't you remarry?

 

Man: Okay, I'd get married again.

 

Woman: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)

 

Man: (audible groan)

 

Woman: Would you sleep with her in our bed?

 

Man: Where else would we sleep?

 

Woman: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?

 

Man: That would seem like the proper thing to do.

 

Woman: And would you let her use my golf clubs?

 

Man: She can't use them -- she's left-handed.

 

Woman: (silence)

 

Man: Sh*t.